Do dreams have meaning?

[davidthegnome]

I've been pondering a dream I had over a week ago for some time now. It's something that continues to persistently invade my thoughts. Though I tend to dismiss it as just a dream, I wonder if perhaps someone here - someone more spiritual than I, might possibly have an answer for my questions. I am agnostic, yet somehow I cannot completely dismiss the feeling that this dream I had was connected to the spiritual realm through my subconscious mind.

So... for those of you who have some free time or an interest in the subject, I wrote this. Amateur work at best, but it more or less sums up the issue.

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I was floating. Not falling, not walking, nor can it appropriately be defined as flying, as it was much too slow. My gaze was directed up wards, floating through a tunnel with walls I did not see or consider. Gazing up I saw faces, my younger sister, her boyfriend - and my older sister and her boyfriend as well. Somehow, I felt, we were all connected. Somehow their faces seemed more than what I would normally see. Beautiful, remarkably beautiful. From the nose, to the hair, to the lips and cheek-bones. Somehow it was all so magnificent I could only gaze up wards in awe. Words cannot do it justice, the sense of peace I felt. Like a child, staring in amazement at a magic show.

I was dead, yet more alive than I had ever been. The vague recollection of a plane crash ran through my mind briefly. I remember there was, or had been, a problem with my left eye. That somehow involved my heart. I don't know - dreams don't have to make sense do they?

Someone was missing. I don't know how I knew this, but I knew. I saw a blue form, without a face, without distinctive features that would tell me who she was (yet I knew it was feminine). Yet my heart did not ache, I remember thinking of her - of how she had saved me before, but I could not remember how, or why, or when, or from what. I know only that she is, and was, both beautiful and magical. I had the feeling that she wanted me to open my eyes, but, as far as I knew, they already were open.

There was a peace, floating through that tunnel, a contentment, an amazing sense that all was right and would turn out as it should. Complete inner peace, the likes of which I have never properly grasped nor even imagined. I thought of the magic girl, the blue form without distinctive features. Amazing, and she had saved me. Somehow I knew her then, somehow the how of it, or the why of it wasn't important. I knew her, and I knew that she had saved me. I knew that she was magical, and that we were connected.

I woke. The soft clicking of the computer mouse upon my computer desk informing me that my mother was there, playing free cell. At first the feeling of peace persisted, yet as the realm of dreams and sleep faded from my mind, I began to think, and thinking, I began to doubt.

I groaned, and sat up. "I had a funny dream" I informed my Mother. She must have said something that indicated curiosity (though I do not remember what) because I continued to ramble about it until I realized how absurd it must have sounded. She only nodded and kept on clicking.

I lay back down in bed for a time, thinking to myself about the faces, about the connected feeling I had experienced. About the peace... but mostly, about the girl. I felt, even after the dream had faded, a certainty that she was real. A certainty that we would meet again, that she had indeed saved me before. Though I did not know how.

As the days go by I continue to wonder, as that certainty has faded. Was it just a dream? Some odd, meaningless dream, inspired by the beer and wine I'd drunk the night before? I felt... at first, a fierce longing for that magical girl, the one who had saved me. Yet as time goes on my conscious mind has slowly dismissed the notion as fanciful.

Still, I think of her when I drive, I think of her when I lay down to sleep. I think of her, often. Of a person or a being that probably (realistically) does not exist. And I long for her. Not the sexual longing a young man might feel for a beautiful woman - though she is indeed beautiful... or was, or would be if she existed.

No, the longing I feel is something deeper, something spiritual, perhaps. I feel as if there is a lack within my life, as if my eyes are not quite even half open. As if I am going through life, asleep. It is a sad, lonely feeling, though I can't say whether or not it has any grounding within reality. The longing began the day I woke from the dream, and has continued since.

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So, my question... well, the whole thing might seem absurd, but it is something that, perhaps, involves my spirit in one way or another. I had a vague feeling, during that dream, that the girl, the magical one, was telling me to open my eyes to save my heart. Though she was not really there, or only half there. It makes little sense to me, and perhaps it's a sign of a disturbed mind that I post it here.

My question is, does this dream, or any dream ever really mean anything? Is it possible that my subconscious is trying to tell me something? Or was it just an odd dream, perhaps due to the alcohol I'd had the night before - perhaps simply a weird dream with no specific meaning or cause at all.

Advice, information, or mere speculation (or assurances that to even wonder indicates a disturbed mind and I should seek professional help) would be appreciated. Somehow I feel that this is somehow spiritual - though as an agnostic, I'm not even sure I believe in the spirit.