Why I can never accept any invitation to say grace.

[Deep13]

Dear god, thank you for this bounty which my mother bought and then prepared with no help from you. Thanks also for the gift of life which also happened without any direction from you. But mostly, thanks for sending your son, who is also somehow you, whom you sent to be tortured and murdered because somehow you made us evil and killing this guy will make us not evil. Or something like that. Except he did not really die but rose into what I have to assume is outer space. So yeah, thanks a bunch for that. And we give thanks for our bone-stupid electorate who think that believing in your impossible existence really hard is a substitute for experience and wisdom. I know saying such things will anger you and you might strike me dead, which by-the-way seems a long time coming. I have to conclude, therefore, that you are a celestial pussy without the guts to take any responsibility for the shitty job you are doing running the world.

Amen and fuck you, YHWH.

[YankeyMCC]

1. I like to get the opportunity to say grace

which I do often get because the family that is sooo concerned that I don't believe in gods usually neglects this. And when I do get the chance I say something to the effect of "Thank Goodness"

Thank the goodness of the skill of the farmers who raised the food
Thank the goodness of the skill of the cooks who prepared the food
Thank the goodness of the skill of all of us of paid for the food
Thank the goodness of everyone around the table that we can be so happy and joyful today
Thank the goodness of others around the world who work to make life better for others.

[Warpy]

2. People know I'll give the Archie Bunker grace

"Bless the meat and damn the skin
Open yer kisser and cram it in!"

[muriel_volestrangler]

3. 'Damn the skin'? That's heresy!

It's about flavour ...

[JNelson6563]

4. My Granfather's version

Good bread, good meat,
Good God let's eat!

Always irked Grandma. :toast: