Anyone else tired of Monday morning quarterbacking?

[CBHagman]

First, a confession to make: A friend of mine gave me an earful, so to speak, via e-mail, on the Democrats and how they don't know how to win elections. He singled Bob Shrum out in particular for criticism, and of course laid into Kerry's campaign.

Here's the thing. I did some volunteering for Kerry, and I find such rants really demoralizing. I have an extremely hard time taking it, especially from someone who hasn't run a campaign. Most of my friends and family have treated me with a lot of caution following the election, knowing how I feel about it. In fact, their tendency to approach the topic gingerly amuses me most of the time.

So I e-mailed back and asked him to give me some breathing room and implied I felt a bit guilty in light of his comments. He wrote back that he blamed the Democrats, not me, etc., etc. I then thought I should have been more direct (i.e., "Please stop talking that way. I find it demoralizing."). After all, I am one of the Democrats who failed, even if he doesn't see it that way.

So now I feel both dishonest AND annoyed.

How are you dealing with all this post-election crud?

[TayTay]

1. There isn't a whole lot you can do.

Ask your friend if they hold out any hope for it getting better. If so, from where do they anticipate this help coming? If not, why do they care anymore?

Some people can't see that constructive criticism is a good thing as is some navel-gazing. But pointless and aimless criticism is just so much hot air and can be easily ignored. (Content-free griping.)

[LittleClarkie]

2. By bursting into tears every once in a while

esp. when I think of the hope I had before, and the dreams of saving the country.

Maybe it wasn't the best campaign. But damn if felt like a winner toward the end there. I still flash back to certain people of the Republican persuasion that I know who took such great glee in dancing before me going "flippy floppy flippy floppy" (this was a rather round man who looked like an imbecile at that moment). Another whom I was honestly trying to explain Kerry cutting the budget on several weapon systems in the 80's. Never could I get them to let me say the whole thing. I'd try starting with "Cheney was advocating cutting the same..." Interrupted. "Cheney's not running for president." I try again. "Yes, but you don't understand. He was a budget hawk and this was the time of the $200 hammer. He voted for..." Interrupted. "Before he voted against?
HAR!

Yeah, guys, laugh it up. It doesn't mean life or death to anyone, does it? It's just a political game, and all you wanna do is have your side win. Nevermind that Bush isn't even a traditional Republican. I swear some Republicans never looked at him long enough to see that he was NOT a fiscal conservative. They acted like Kerry was going to be the spend thrift, when he'd actually helped balance the budget, and gotten liberal flack for it besides.

Not to mention that the more I fell in love with Kerry, the more this shit hurt. I'd end up in tears alot.

I just wish there was more I could do besides watch. I see people getting upset, normal average folk who never struck me as particularly liberal calling Bush a Hitler.

I guess I'm just emotional right now. The anniversary of my dad's death was Saturday, and I'm slowly realizing it's affecting me more than I realized. I sometimes psychoanalyze myself, thinking I only became more into the campaign after he died, and maybe I got so attached to our sailor Senator because my dad was in the Navy too, and watching the GOP smear a veteran just got me on a deep level.

That and discovering Gitmo in April. I was worried about those guys from the minute I found out we'd detained them for almost 2 years with no recourse. And I was right too. I still remember the stories I read where the Army tried to say that every single one of them was supposed to be there. Oh sure, the military never makes mistakes. No need for checks and balances here. They don't get due process. They're not Americans. As if we were the only ones in the world entitled to what is only right for any man.

Even now, I wonder if all this administration has done will ever come out. If you're a believer in God, wouldn't you think he'd get sick of these tactics being used in his name and sooner or later kick some divine butt across the stage? Surely these people's time is coming. How long do can they be expected to get away with this shit. When does it hit the fan?

I mean, who do you even believe. I see Wayne Madsen has a new article out about "The Christian Mafia." Do we believe all this conspiracy stuff? Does Madsen have credibility? What about all the other books written about the BFEE? How much of that is credible. Are we really dealing with people that freaking evil? Surely that can't go on forever. Something's gotta break. But what the hell to do?

Getting back to your original question, this is part of why I won't let anyone just point a finger at Kerry. The poster shares in it, Shrum, Kerry, the media, the GOP and their nasty ways, and every person who couldn't see what's going on and only cared that Bush could have a beer with them and whether or not TeRAHsa was going to throw ketsup bottles at the Iraqis. I hope, like the Nazis, they end up having to curl up in a ball somewhere far, far away. I don't think even Argentina would take them this time.

Um. You apparently pushed a hot button. Sorry about the ramble.

[ginnyinWI]

3. Aw Clarkie

We know how you feel--we've all had those moments. Yes, I would agree with you that focusing on the campaign might have been a way to delay grieving over your dad, and that now it is working its way out. But we all did it to some degree; myself because of being mad at Bush since he was "selected" and Gore rejected, and just knowing in my gut that Bush was bad news for the country. And unfortunately I was more right on that count than I had imagined. Who would have ever predicted the levels of incompetence?

As much as we'd like to see the repubs eat their words and regret their votes, most probably won't ever admit that they made a big mistake when they voted. They still would say that they voted for the best alternative! For that I blame the Democratic Party, for not getting our values out there where people could see them! I used to be a Republican, and voting for a Democrat was just not an option--unthinkable. They were the ones who spent too much money and raised our taxes!! They were the ones who were too radical, too dangerous!

Indeed. It would seem that now the Republicans are the radical spend-crazy party. And people think they are the conservative ones!
Oh and the repubs were also the party that was supposed to be able to handle foreign relations the best, and the Democrats were the ones who started wars!! Do you see the irony? It seems that we've gone through Alice's Looking Glass.

Keep the faith, Clarkie. We've still got John Kerry and a lot of other courageous, brave and true Dems in Congress who are going to put it all on the line for us. We will rise and the other side will be brought down. There are just too many things hanging like millstones around their necks for them to prevail much longer! They keep a brave face on to the media, but look a little deeper and you see signs. The repubs that have come out to speak on behalf of the Social Security reform thing, or this budget seem anything but enthusiastic. They look like someone is holding a gun to their backs behind a curtain! You can tell when someone is really happy about a new project, and they aren't.

:pals:

[elshiva]

4. LittleClarkie, I still cry about Gore, but even more about Kerry.

Gore, again, is a great man who would have been so good for this country as far as the environment, education and GLBT rights.
Kerry was different. I wasn't in love with Gore, but I still am in love with Kerry. Don't even try to be indifferent about. Cry for God's sakes it is a fucking national tragedy!

[CBHagman]

6. I'm getting a lot out of your post, Little Clarkie.

First of all, I'm sorry to hear about your father. I had no idea. And certainly that brings a good deal more emotion to all your experiences of the last year.

I can't do justice to what you've written right now, but I loved this passage:

"Even now, I wonder if all this administration has done will ever come out. If you're a believer in God, wouldn't you think he'd get sick of these tactics being used in his name and sooner or later kick some divine butt across the stage? Surely these people's time is coming. How long do can they be expected to get away with this shit. When does it hit the fan?"

I've been reading up on Texas Republicans, particularly Tom DeLay, and I can't believe how often I pray for divine punishment for those guys, or at least an indictment that can't be shaken off.

But that gets away from the original purpose of this thread. Yes, self-criticism is a good thing, but I am so dragged down by the Gloomy Guses of life, many of whom are actually on our side but also real energy vampires who will tell us It's All for Our Own Good.

Back later, folks. Hang in there!

[karynnj]

7. It seems a lot of us are having a harder time with this loss than

with other campaign losses. I agree wholeheartedly with both you and the original poster that it is painful to point fingers at anyone (on the Democratic team).

Maybe it was partly because we so strongly desired a regime change even before we knew who was running in the primaries. But I think another part of it was that the more one read of Kerry the more exceptionally qualified he seemed to fix the horrendous mess we were in.

It was also hard because it seemed the media was complicit in repeating Republican lies leading people to have very little information on either of the candidates. There seemed so many accomplishments in Kerry's life that were never covered. Even the antiwar stuff ignored how involved he was in Veteran's welfare issues. (Someone had posted a link to the 1971 Senate testimony including the q&a part on the K/E blog last summer - I had never read anything but the prepared statement.) It still seems with the normal level of "meet the candidate" type stuff that is published and/or broadcast leading up to the convention didn't happen. Then the convention coverage on the networks was cut to 3 hours vs 9 hours four years before - don't they get the airways for free with a duty to use them for the public good.

Also, I think both the Tour of Duty book (and later, Going Upriver) and the Butler book of photographs, may have both allowed people who chose to read them a unusually personal view of a candidate. Kerry's Vietnam story in the book seemed to be more about conscience and morality than war medals. The fact that he is consistently described as private, reserved and somewhat shy, makes it more impressive that he allowed either of these projects to go forward. So in addition to being impressed with his intelligence and the positions he stood for, I liked him better than any candidate in my life time. So, when Democrats lost in the past, I regretted that we were losing control of the agenda - this time it was not only that, but a feeling of real sadness that a man of Kerry's intelligence, morality and commitment would not be President. This at a time when the world greatly needs these attributes in the President.

[Vektor]

5. I have most people on permanent ignore.

I have a bit of a reputation among my circle of acquaintances for being a bit of a loose cannon who can really hold my own in a political debate. The few Repugs/naysayers who have attempted to start shit with me have been swiftly and violently verbally annihilated. Most have been REEAAAALLLLYYY nice...

Too nice. :-)

I have been balls out, in your face, LIVID since the election, and it has worked for me quite well. I haven't had any real attempts from anyone to put down the party to my face.

I heartily recommend forgoing banter with negative "friends" in favor of flat out refusing to take their shit and making it clear that you will not.

Sounds harsh, but works miracles. Good luck! :-)