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i spent the whole last week in exile, doing everything i could to stay out of the way. it helped some, but also underscored his fear. space only does just so much. my therapist advised him to call his if he felt like he was in trouble, and i decided that i was going to promise to call mine if i thought things were getting out of hand. i think this will really work, because she can help me with my own fear, and with the incredible loneliness of going through this without him to hang onto. i can't tell him to call his, but i'm pretty sure that my call would prompt his. my going to therapy really built a bridge for him, and one of the big factors in this spiral was that i canceled my appointment for last week, and was talking about maybe switching. i didn't see at first how it was working on him to think that i was crazy, and not going to be there for him. that i not only picked the appointment back up, but that we both went, and he got to see that i had a good therapist was an enormous relief. that she pissed me off was icing on his cake. so, better, better.
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