I need a thicker skin.

[mac56]

Little ornery shit, little obsessions and "what ifs", are getting to me lately way out of proportion to what they should. My "mountain versus molehill" monitor is waaaaaay out of whack. I have very poor bearings as to what's a big deal and what isn't - and unfortunately the people I find myself among aren't a whole lotta help in that regard.

Add on edit: I truly envy people who can go through life. never giving an apparent thought to this kind of thing: what's right or what's wrong. As far as I can remember I've always been this way, even as a kid. There are just some times when I somehow keep better tabs on it than others.

What the hell do you do?

[ThingsGottaChange]

1. Hey, Mac, I know exactly what you are talking about

I've also spent my entire life with these thoughts. The endless tape. Playing over and over and over. The only time it stopped for me was then I first took Prozac. For the first time in my life, I could think just like everyone else! Something I had always dreamed of doing.

I've run the gamut of AD's and am back to Prozac. Doesn't do much anymore. The thoughts aren't as bad as they were before AD's but, they are still there. What if? Is this the right way to think? Feel? What would others think? Feel?

I spend my entire life wanting to just BE. And not thinking about how to BE.

I know, not a whole lot of help. Are you on any meds? I think it's mostly an anxiety thing.

Take Care!

[Bluerthanblue]

2. don't mean to sound ....?... smart assed...

or like I don't understand your frustration or the feelings you are expressing- but I was given a little sign years ago with Ziggy saying:

"It's not the big things that get you down, it's the constant pitter-patter of all the little de-feats".

It's proven so true from my view- like the 'last straw' kind of thing. And, to be very honest, there isn't much today that IS 'little shit'- because it is all connected to the 'big picture'- the hell we are in, the direction this world seems bent on taking- (or the powerlessness that the majority of us actually have to bring about change, in a meaningful, timely, and TANGIBLE way.)

I believe what you are saying is that you are fully alive, and aware- that you are NOT 'numbing down- or dumbing down' in order to function- because when we take a good clear look at this tired old world, and the powerful elite who are pulling all of the strings.... right down to the words you are allowed to speak on the 'air', the power of our 'voices' to be heard- the 'accountability' that is selectively applied, not to those who are in power, but to those who have become powerless.

If someone had told you 10 yrs ago, that we'd be on the cusp of a fascist state, in pre-emptive war with a middle-eastern Nation, and manipulated by a 'bought out' media, and monopolized utilities- and essential services... that something like Katrina could occur, and so few heads roll- that theocracy in america had become a real threat... you'd have thought them insane...

and here we are- I'd say you are healthy- and aware- and outrage, confusion, and frustration, (and depression, or anger) are appropriate responses- how to handle them..... which I realize is your question, and issue-
i wish i could offer you a truly good suggestion. I don't do well with the stuff myself-.... drugs are my best option i'm sad to admit.
That or throwing myself deeply into work- (denial, and forced distractions) sometimes is possible. but less and less often-

Write it down???? talk to a piece of paper, and vent it all as much as you can?? sometimes that helps me to ...understand some of the deeper triggers-

i wish you comfort and peace-
blu

[hedgehog]

3. I read a theory once asking

what was the evolutionary value of depression/anxiety? The conclusion was that while it didn't help that particular monkey very much, the troop as a whole was aided if one little guy was always worried about whether there was a leopard sitting on the next tree etc. I guess we're just wired to be ultra sensitive.

[mac56]

4. Brilliant. Thank you.

I read this response early this morning, and it lifted a burden right off my shoulders.

Not long ago I opined to a friend about how some people get anxious and obsess, freeing others in their group from having to.

[Ladyhawk]

6. About 20% of any population of animals is highly sensitive.

I found some interesting information in the book I mentioned in my other post on this thread.

[Ladyhawk]

5. I found myself in the pages of this book:

The Highly Sensitive Person

[DemExpat]

7. I came to a point some years ago when I decided to fully accept

my sensitivities.....my condition.....my specialness even with its handicaps, and this was after I decided to go it without medications and live with myself as I am.

Not for everybody, this choice, especially those who have to work at certain jobs and therefore need to function in a particular way, but I could learn to be myself while nurturing and raising my children.

I truly value my sensitivity - and when I lost it on drugs that were not so good for me (legal and illegal) - I learned what it was to not have to feel the agony and the ecstasy of my journey.

I have chosen to live with my extremes. The agonies are hard to bear but temporary, (all things pass), as are the wonderful ecstacies that regularly come my way. And I have learned that ones who truly love you love and accept you with all of your characteristics.

I guess the main message from those in this thread is - you certainly are not alone, and that the flip side of the excruciating sensitivity is openness to all connections, effects, details, and sometimes deep understanding.

:grouphug:

DemEx

edit: Oh, and one more thing I discovered
was that accepting and even embracing one's thin skin makes it feel thicker automatically, because it is our perception of how the world is and how we are that make our realities.

Barb

[lovelaureng]

8. Therapy, Therapy, advertising causes me,

therapy, therapy.
Ok, seriously, find a good therapist with an open mind, Someone who is certified in Psych-K is even better, although it doesn't take a therapist to facilitate this particular technique. Check it out, Google the term Psych-K and see what you think. Do a little research.
I highly recommend it! If you truly want to get better and I mean really, really make some changes in your life and who you are as a person, I can't stress this enough. Check out Psych-k. You will not regret it. You will be a new person for going through the process. What do you have to lose? Absolutely nothing!
Take care and good luck.