Isn't getting well more important than laying blame?

[TZ]

Seriously. My Thanksgiving with my sister was okay but I wasn't particularly outgoing and my younger sister refused to attend (tired of the hour and a half drive, but I think it might be more than that).
My sister spent a great deal of time complaining about the person who called the police on her. At first she blamed her husband, but now she is blaming her old "counselor". (I found out that the "friend" she was seeing for a counselor also had severe medical issues- she is dying of a brain tumor-and she had mental health issues and was not taking her meds)
And she also claims *now* that she was not suicidal. I kept my mouth shut during this little tirade. I think the woman she was seeing was not helpful, no, but I am hearing what sounds like revisionism of a sort which makes me wonder really how well she is...
I am still not comfortable with her, and my instincts are telling me she still doesn't really get it. There were good reasons for her to be committed.
She is living with her husband but has her own bedroom. I am wondering how much of this "I was wrong" attitude is because she really doesn't have much else she can do, since she had her face rubbed in the fact that her beloved Mark stole considerable money from them.
I have the feeling this is not the end of things. But I will keep my misgivings to myself because no matter how accurate my personal observations might be they won't likely be listened to by anybody. I think I am inclined to keep my contacts with them still to a minimum.

[Droopy]

1. Yes, getting well is more important than laying blame

A good therapist will help you get through the emotional trauma of being mistreated. In my experience, though, with my therapist we figured out that I just needed to let some things go and she helped through that process. There was nothing I could do about it in the present and I was just wasting energy by obsessing about it. That's not the way to handle someone who has been seriously abused, but for someone like me who was hanging on to past slights it was the way to go. It sounds like your sister falls into the same category as me in that regard. She just needs to focus on getting better right now and not worry about anyone else. And you are right in that this is not the end of things unless she gets the help that she needs.

[mopinko]

2. these things take time.

a lot of time. and there is not a lot you can do to help her. don't feel bad about backing away a little. no sense piling up more irritations now.
do try to protect your mom if you can, tho.