my shrink.. I dunno

[undergroundpanther]

I told him that I feel a wave of depression coming,I see the small signs it is coming back,that seemed to not register.I thought it strange.What did he tell me to do?
Take a warm bath with sea salt???
I know that traditionally helps some people.

For me it is trigger central.There laying in a tub, nude, a situation where you cannot jump out of it easy with just a shower curtain ..I feel too vulnerable in a bathtub and the flesh in my face fills me with a profound sadness because I don't like this body it's a flesh cage I barely can tolerate it.
For me a bath,that is not 'relaxing'.

He claimed I have toxins.Well if that is so why do I have to remove it in bath form? I shower, I like it better because I stand up, it feels safer..Besides what toxins? How come he was so vague? Some toxins you need anti toxins or is he just grasping at straws or selling me a new age fix for my efforts at warning him about real issues?

And another thing that bugs me about that dismissive kind of shit is it reminds me of when I was a kid and the incident with my father happened. I did the right thing. I tried to tell the local sheriff what happened to me but he didn't listen,to me at all he just basically dismissed me and told me to drink a glass of warm milk.(this was before there was a 911 for emergency calls)

I kinda got that kind of dismissive air from my shrink this time.
I was warning him.
Now I am breaking out,my scalp and feet are a mess because the stress is building..and I am feeling urges to cut again.

I don't like it.

[hedgehog]

1. I wish I could help you. Try to be kind to yourself.