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Years ago, I managed a sub shop that stayed open pretty late. My typical shift was 5:00pm to 2:30am or so, depending on the volume of business, and I got into the habit of drinking a lot of Coke into those wee hours of the morning. Then, I'd go home and usually stay up until four or five before heading to bed and sleeping until noon or so. I didn't drink any Coke after getting home.
Sometimes, though, I'd feel what I would now describe as an almost crushing depression, typically about an hour or two after leaving the shop, and it eventually got bad enough that I actually had to tell myself that--based on prior episodes--I wouldn't feel it when I awoke. As it turns out, I was always right in this regard, but honestly it didn't make the feeling any easier to bear at the time.
I've never been in any sort of therapy, and I'm not well read on the subject, but I believe that I experienced a range of symptoms associated with depression: sadness, hopelessness, despair, isolation, lethargy, etc., as well as painfully dark introspection.
As I mentioned, the feeling would always be gone by the time I woke up, though it took me quite a few cycles to realize this, and quite a few more until I was able to convince myself of the pattern.
But in spite of all of that, it wasn't until months later that it occurred to me that my caffeine intake might have had something to do with it. I began to wonder if "coming down" from my nightly caffeine binge while at work could have brought on these feelings, or perhaps amplified feelings that were already there at a much lower intensity. I later left that job, and correspondingly my caffeine intake dropped; I also moved to a more reasonable sleep cycle. In any case, these bouts of depression eventually went away but left me wondering at their cause.
I'm glad to report that I haven't really suffered from depression in years, but I'd be very grateful if someone could corroborate my anecdotal observations with a similar experience.
Thanks for reading and for sharing your views.
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