Ms Toad takes F.Gordon on a Colorado Mountain Hike

[F.Gordon]

Or… “You can lead a stupid farm boy from Iowa to the Mountains but you can’t get him to take a decent pic to save his life.”

It’s no secret that I really suck at Landscape - Outdoors - Nature photography. Actually I pretty much suck at every kind of photography but I really really really suck at Landscape - Outdoors - Nature stuff. So, when Ms. Toad contacted me and said she would be in my neck of the woods and invited me on a Photography Hike in the Mountains I was very excited.

I got up that day at a very early hour and headed out but got stuck in a major traffic jam. Took me 45 minutes to travel about 2 miles. Fearful that I wouldn’t make our predetermined rendezvous point on time I called Ms. Toad who put me on the phone with a local and she gave me directions to the Trail Head.... “Just look it up on your Mountain Trail Map…..” Mountain Trail Map??? I need a friggin’ Mountain Trail Map???!!!!
:wtf:

After getting through the worst of the traffic I engaged Warp Drive on our little F’Mobile Mini-Van and actually arrived on time at the trail head. Even more amazing was the fact that I FOUND the trail head.
:dunce:

As we started out on the hike you can imagine my shock and amazement when I discovered that this trail wasn’t paved or anything. It was real rugged like. Apparently this is fairly common for most Mountain Trails. Oh, and apparently all Colorado Mountain trails are Pink. Someone needs to do some of that photo editing stuff.
:freak:



The trail we took followed this beautiful mountain stream. Ever so often I would actually notice the fact that the trail we took followed this beautiful mountain stream and I would catch a snap of it. (can you find the smiley face in this one?)



At one point I wandered a little off the trail and I found what every self-respecting Landscape - Outdoors - Nature photographer dreams of finding. Green Leaves with rain drops. I shouted out… “hey everyone there are some green leaf things over here with rain drops!!!!” A few people turned and looked at me, apparently annoyed. I think they were snappin’ Mountain Lions, Grizzly Bears, or something boring like that. Well, fine. I had the green leaf things with rain drops all to myself. Click.



Near the highest point of the trail there were these awesome views. Beautiful Mountain Vistas, Forests, Mountain Streams, people on a rock ruining your snaps of mountain vistas, forests, mountain streams…



Most have seen the beautiful photo Ms. Toad took of the pretty shroom’. I had wandered over to find her frustrated that she lost the light or something photographilistical like that. Well, after tripping over a rock and then standing up I saw the shroom’ and I thought to myself “I didn’t need no stinking’ Light… I have beautiful Landscape - Outdoors -Nature snaps to take. Times’ a wastin“…. Click.



Having had no breakfast that day I thought that the shroom’ looked might tasty so I yanked that sucker up and munched on it for awhile. What happened next is a little foggy. I’ve been told that they found me about an hour later prancing nude in the woods. I think they were just yanking my chain….but ya’ know, I have absolutely no memory of taking this snap.
:scared:



Not to be outdone by all the great Landscape Photogs around here with their fancy water photos I decided I would step out into the mountain stream and setup my tripod. I couldn’t believe that I actually got the tripod level and grabbed this 4 second snap. Caught Ms Toad looking at me out of the corner of my eye. Not sure if she was concerned for me or she was waiting to get the DU Photo Group shot of the Year…. F.Gordon and Camera falling into the water.



Later on the trail this voice comes out of nowhere. “We’re over here”. I look. Where’s… uhhh… Here? Everyone was under The Harry Potter Tree about 10 feet off the trail. I grabbed a few snaps but this one… I setup the tripod against the tree and I swear I had major camera shake going on.



And this one. Since I had a polarizer filter on I did a snap into the sun. I think it might have screwed up my camera by doing this because the snap seems to have a very slight blue cast to it.



Did I mention that the trails weren’t paved or anything? Real rugged like.



Every so often my Artistic Instincts would kick into auto mode. The spirit of Ansel Adams would take over and I’d be in the Zone. I would see things that no one else would. I’d.. .. hey… who the hell is that in the background ruining my Zone???



On the way back I rounded a bend in the trail and I saw IT. A cover snap for Colorado Beautiful Magazine. This was the snap I’d been waiting to take all day. This was finally IT. I spent a good 15-20 minutes getting everything perfect. The exposure, the DOF, the focus, the framing, the person on the trail. Person on the Trail??? “Hey, you on the trail!!!! You’re ruining my Colorado Beautiful Magazine cover snap!!!”



Took quite a few snaps that day and this is the very last one I took. We had returned to the trail head. After I took the snap Ms. Toad came over and said.. “it’s too bad that bush was in the way”. Bush? Huh? What is she talking about… Oh....

Note to self: When doing Landscape - Outdoors - Nature photography bring Pruning Tools and a Chain Saw.



At the end of the day I still really really really sucked at Landscape - Outdoors - Nature photography but I didn’t care. I had fun and I met some wonderful people; Ms Toad, her spouse, Mom, and Dad. Her spouse was a kick and had me figured out in no time.. Knew I was out of my element up there. Mom was a sweetheart even though she wouldn’t give me her waaaay kewl walking stick. And Dad was awesome. He was doing a Colorado Wildflower thing. At one point on the trail I looked over and saw Dad half way down this steep incline snappin’ some wildflowers.

Oh, and Ms Toad was wonderful too. ;-) I wish I would have followed her lead because she's a great photographer.

[intheflow]

1. Aah, the magic mushroom!

I was thinking you were on some kind of hallucinogen when you invited us to "find the smiley face" in the stream shot. I couldn't see a face in the rock, trees, or water, and even looked around for a person in the shot, but apparently, this was one of a very few shots you took that day sans people.

People and tripping aside, will you stop beating yourself up about your so-called lack of nature photography ability, already?!? You have some gorgeous shots here, FG. I particularly like the mushroom and the cropped running water shot. And even with the people, your Colorado Mag Cover shot is beautiful.

[F.Gordon]

2. Work with me. I got a "thing" going here

:crazy:

Most snaps didn't have people in them. I had to find ones that did because they worked with the "story". I could have easily erased the people. Oh, and the smiley face is there.

I always bounce between being very comfortable with what I do to having complete digust for what I do. With these it was an important part of the "story" that I throw the "I really really really suck" part in. Guess I need to watch how I say things.... the line between when I'm being serious and when I'm being not-serious can get a little blurry. That said... I still don't think I'm that good at Landscape - Outdoors - Nature stuff put I'll keep trying.

The Cover :eyes: snap is one of my faves. I've got it put aside to work on it. It was a filmsie snap as was the cropped water snap. Why is it cropped? The camera was fairly low and close to the water... I checked the frame but I didn't look closely enough. The only way I could have done this was to kneel or sit in the stream which I wasn't going to do. The problem..... my lens hood had rotated and cut off two corners of the snap. x( I need to get one of those things that attaches to the viewfinder that lets you look down.

I though I left quite a few clues in my "story" to tip ya' off to what was going on. Oh, and I actually do own a Colorado Mountain Trail map. I also own a computer tracking map for the entire lower 48 which is far more sophisticated... location of every body of water... every trail...caves... elevations.. the whole topographical thing.

I'll start putting disclaimers in my posts.
:silly:

[intheflow]

3. No need for a written disclaimer.

Not when you have a disclaimer smiley at your disposal: :nopity:

And I know you're not being 100% serious when you write about how much you suck. I just like giving you a hard time because, you know... I suck.
:silly:

[F.Gordon]

5. No way. I suck way more than you.

I'm the suckiest....
:silly:

[F.Gordon]

4. For Ms Toad and RadFemFL

FYI for Ms Toad: The area where we were at the highest point? If you climbed over the peak you'd be in Bobcat territory. The complete trail is about 6 miles and does a loop. At the lowest point is an open meadow filled with wildflowers and an unobstructed view of Longs Peak. I plan on going back in autumn if I'm not too tied up with all this political stuff to get some better snaps... and the Longs Peak snap from the meadow.

RadFemFL: This trail has a difficulty rating of "moderate". I'm not sure what that means but it's a pretty easy trail... at least the part we were on. I'm fairly certain that this trail is very close to where you live. Before I went I thought this was close to Estes Park, because I didn't know where I was going, but it's actually closer to Boulder.

That's all.
:hi:

[JeffR]

6. If you don't write a how-to book one of these days

it'll be a damn shame. "F.Gordon's Guide to Sarcasm, Snappin' and Self-Deprecation" - a guaranteed bestseller.

Great shots & great narration! Still lookin' for that smiley face... in the meantime I did notice you have a T.Rex (F.Rex?) head in that photo:

[F.Gordon]

7. Years ago when I wore a suit and tie

I had to spend two weeks in Charlotte NC for this training thing. One day a dozen or so of us are in this room and we all had to give a phrase that described ourselves. When my turn came I said.... "a friendly cynic"... everyone in the room applauded. :eyes:
:evilgrin:

You're getting warmer on the happy face... but noooo ceeegar. Hmmm... I didn't see the F-Rex.

Thanks.

[Blue_In_AK]

8. Wasting away again in Amanitaville, huh?

:rofl: These are really cool shots, and I love your commentary. I'm looking forward to taking you on the Granite Tors trail or something similar when you come to Alaska. You up for 15 miles?

[F.Gordon]

10. 15 miles??!!! Maybe on an ATV

I'm more a Zen type of photographer.
O8)

There's nothing worth snappin' say... the first 3 to 5 miles?
:shrug:

If I'm lugging my camera crap then I'm taking pixies. Sometimes I'll hang at the same place for quite awhile. Can you leave a trail of bread crumbs so I can catch up with you?
:rofl:

[CC]

9. If a person listened to you they would think you

can't write or take pictures. Good thing most of us know better. These are great. You even have a contest entry already. The cover snap is perfect for a cover snap, with the person.

[F.Gordon]

11. I'm starting to feel real guilty about doin' this thread

I just find that there are times that I want to explore different ways of telling a story or expressing myself. I think maybe I wandered a little too far into the deep end of the pool on this one though.
:-(

I'll try to act a little more normal in the future, and thanks for your kind words. You think "cover snap" would be a good contest entry? I was thinkin' of something maybe a little... different. :P Have some b&w filmsie snaps I took last winter that I want to check out.

:hi:

[CC]

12. I like laughing

as I go through a thread. As for contest entry, yep you need to go on another hike and snap a few more, but only because it would be a good excuse to take a break. Numbers 8 and 11 are great contest ideas. Just a tie for which I like better. Then again haven't seen the black & whites yet.

As for acting normal in the future, why would anyone want to be normal? That might be the first step down the road toward the right.:scared:

[intheflow]

13. Stop the presses! I think I found the smiley!

Am I right, FG? And if so, do I win a prize?

[F.Gordon]

14. About damn time

I mean geez.. it was soooooo obvious.

Prize? Sure.

You and a companion get to spend an all expense paid 12 month vacation on the beautiful Mississippi Gulf Coast.

Oh... wait....

Disclaimer: This post is 59% serious.

[intheflow]

15. The prize sucks.

Disclaimer: :nopity:

[Ms. Toad]

16. Here I've been waiting to see these and almost missed them!

I'm on the road, again.... story of my life recently.

Not only that, but my computer pooped out on me so all my shots of F. Gordon wading into the creek are sitting on a very expensive doorstop about 2000 miles away. With any luck when I return the 4 days of charging will have given it enough juice so that I can power it up long enough to retrieve the last three years of pictures I've taken. (I'm posting this from my expensive new, non-doorstop, photo-less computer.) Guess you'll all have to imagine the vision.

It was a fun day!

[F.Gordon]

17. Bummer. I remember you were having power problems

With your laptop. Hope you're taking time to do something fun now and then. I'll get all my photos from that day online so you can see them. If I posted all of them here the photogroup would probably submit a petition to Skinner to have me tombstoned. :D I got a couple of good shots of you for my scrapbook that you might like to have.

Take care. Hope your puter' problems aren't serious.
:hi:

[Ms. Toad]

18. Apparently, its a design flaw.

They put a processor chip in that runs too hot and melts the power jack off the motherboard. I can get a temporary fix. If I'm lucky, I will only have to fix it once every six to 18 months (at a cost of $300-$500 a pop). The first fix was when it was 14 months old. At about 15 months after the first fix it needed its second fix (I made it limp along for an extra 5 months, but now it is dead as a doorknob).

For $100 I can pretend its a desktop and run it on a relatively permanent alternate power connection, but unless I'm willing to keep replacing motherboards its done traveling. I am in the process of breaking in its replacement - and once the docking port arrives I should be able to salvage my pictures (and other files). With any luck, I'll be able to salvage soon enough to find a photo for the September contest.

Fun...what's that?

You got a lot of nice shots from the day - I look forward to seeing the rest when you get them online somewhere!