Caring for your Introvert - an article for the clueless extrovert

[politicat]

When I read this, I mentally said, "Aha! I understand now! I can explain it!"

Well, in fact, I can't, because extroverts don't get it, but this article makes it a little easier. After handing a copy to my mother and my sister (both extroverts on crack) they both have calmed down some about my crappy ability to respond to phone calls and email.

http://www.theatlantic.com/doc/200303/rauch

********excerpt***********

Do you know someone who needs hours alone every day? Who loves quiet conversations about feelings or ideas, and can give a dynamite presentation to a big audience, but seems awkward in groups and maladroit at small talk? Who has to be dragged to parties and then needs the rest of the day to recuperate? Who growls or scowls or grunts or winces when accosted with pleasantries by people who are just trying to be nice?

If so, do you tell this person he is "too serious," or ask if he is okay? Regard him as aloof, arrogant, rude? Redouble your efforts to draw him out?

If you answered yes to these questions, chances are that you have an introvert on your hands—and that you aren't caring for him properly. Science has learned a good deal in recent years about the habits and requirements of introverts. It has even learned, by means of brain scans, that introverts process information differently from other people (I am not making this up). If you are behind the curve on this important matter, be reassured that you are not alone. Introverts may be common, but they are also among the most misunderstood and aggrieved groups in America, possibly the world.

[Catchawave]

1. Great article !

Finally got around to reading it. I'm married to an extrovert, and the author knows what he's talking about :hi:

[mainegreen]

2. Good article

*snip*
Are introverts arrogant? Hardly. I suppose this common misconception has to do with our being more intelligent, more reflective, more independent, more level-headed, more refined, and more sensitive than extroverts.
*/snip*

:D

[politicat]

3. That's not arrogance.

That's the truth. There's a difference....

*grin*

[eleny]

4. Thank you!

The article was a huge eye opener. My husband fits this orientation. He appreciated the article, too.

It's given me so much more understanding about who he is. And maybe about that small corner of myself who needs to be dragged to parties and then given time to recuperate!

[Wapsie B]

5. I love that article!

Boy, aloof, distant, arrogant are all adjectives used to label me at times in my life, but mainly used by clueless extroverts.

[Louisiana1976]

9. Me, too! I've also been labelled "afraid of people" by the clueless.

[deepthought42]

6. Wow, great article! Fascinating read...

That is definately me. I can only take so much socializing before I just get tired of people. I'm a wallflower is large groups, so I get tired of feeling left out. If I'm not up to making the effort to socialize, there's no point in it...

[medeak]

7. Thank you so much!!!!

just breezed onto this site trying to figure out brilliant 25 yr old son...this really explains it all!

Bless you!

[Zookeeper]

8. Thank you for posting that article!

I will print it and show it to my husband and three kids (ALL extroverts :crazy: ).

Like the writer, I can be very charming in social situations, but I dread it and find it exhausting. The older I get, the less interest I have in wasting the energy.