Psalm 23: Bush is my shepherd; I dwell in want.

[UrbScotty]

I got this in an email.

Bush is my shepherd; I dwell in want.
He maketh logs to be cut down in national forests.
He leadeth trucks into the still wilderness.
He restoreth my fears.
He leadeth me in the paths of international disgrace for his ego's
sake.
Yea, though I walk through the valley of pollution and war,
I will find no exit, for thou art in office.
Thy tax cuts for the rich and thy media control, they discomfort me.
Thou preparest an agenda of deception in the presence of thy religion.
Thou anointest my head with foreign oil.
My health insurance runneth out.
Surely megalomania and false patriotism shall follow me all the days
of thy term,
And my jobless child shall dwell in my basement forever.

[progressoid]

1. I likes it

[StrongbadTehAwesome]

2. haha!

the ending is great...I'm definitely passing this on

[lady lib]

3. He sucketh up to special interests

and destroyeth the New Deal.

[benny05]

4. Another Joke (old Testament folks too)

In the year 2004, the Lord came unto Noah, who was now living in the United States, and said, "Once again, the earth has become wicked and over-populated and I see the end of all flesh before me.

Build another Ark and save two of every living thing along with a few good humans."

He gave Noah the blueprints, saying, "You have six months to build the Ark before I will start the unending rain for 40 days and 40 nights."

Six months later, the Lord looked down and saw Noah weeping in his yard.... but no ark.

"Noah," He roared, "I'm about to start the rain! Where is the Ark?"

"Forgive me, Lord," begged Noah. "But things have changed.
-I needed a building permit.
-I've been arguing with the inspector about the need for a sprinkler system.
-My neighbors claim that I've violated the neighborhood zoning laws by building the Ark in my yard and exceeding the
height limitations.
-We had to go to the Development Appeal Board for a decision.
-Then the Department of Transportation demanded a bond be posted for the future costs of moving power lines and other overhead
obstructions, to clear the passage for the Ark's move to the sea.
-I argued that the sea would be coming to us, but they would hear nothing of it.

Getting the wood was another problem.
-There's a ban on cutting local trees in order to save the spotted owl. I tried to convince the
environmentalists that I needed the wood to save the owls. But no go!

When I started gathering the animals, I got sued by an animal rights group. They insisted that I was confining wild animals against their will. As well, they argued the accommodation was too restrictive and it was cruel and inhumane to put so many animals in a confined space.

Then the EPA ruled that I couldn't build the Ark until they'd conducted an environmental impact study on your proposed flood.

I'm still trying to resolve a complaint with the Human Rights Commission on how many minorities I'm supposed to hire for my building
crew.

Also, the trades unions say I can't use my sons. They insist I have to hire only Union workers with Ark building experience.

To make matters worse, the IRS seized all my assets, claiming I'm trying to leave the country illegally with endangered species.

So, forgive me, Lord, but it would take at least ten years for me to finish this Ark."

Suddenly the skies cleared, the sun began to shine, and a rainbow stretched across the sky.

Noah looked up in wonder and asked, "You mean, You're not going to destroy the world?".

"No," said the Lord. "The newly elected government beat me to it."

[lady lib]

5. Ha Ha. Now if he'd just rapture those suckers.

Take them! Take them all!