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‘Twas The Night Before Bail-Outs
by Gregory Bachelis, aka mathpol
‘Twas the night before bail-outs, and all through the nation
Not a business was stirring, not large corporations
Their requests had been sent to Congress with care
In hopes that Pelosi, or Reid, would give them a share
The CEO’s had their hopes set on the Fed
And visions of bonuses danced in their heads
I was at home, full of hope and wonder
At the thought of big companies not going under.
Then out on the street there arose such a clatter,
I looked out the window to see what was the matter.
On the street was a hay wagon, making its way
Not the usual wagon, filled with bales of hay.
No, this one, (and I know this sounds funny), Was filled instead with bales full of money.
With a very old driver, so morose and deadpan,
That I knew in a flash it was Alan Greenspan
There was a small note, stuck to each cash bale
With the name of a company too big to fail.
His wagon was drawn by eight sleek mega-bucks
And he shouted their names as he whipped their buttocks
“Now Paulson, Bernanke, Now Rubin and Volcker
On Krugman, On Samuelson, Kudlow and Cramer,
To the next company’s holiday retreat!
So I can deposit a bale at the revelers’ feet"
And so the wagon continued on,
Until the last bail-out bales were gone.
Greenspan then to his team gave a whistle,
And away they all flew like the down of a thistle.
And as they flew way up into the sky,
Alan cried, “I must see Ayn Rand one more time ‘fore I die.”
And I heard him exclaim as they flew into the night
"Happy bail-outs to all, and to none, oversight!"
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