Would you even consider this?

[politicat]

Note: this is a long term, very vague, don't really know what to consider thing.... so any comments or notes are welcome.

Imagine this: three couples and four singles get along really, really well together. They live in pretty much separate houses, but they congregate in each other's houses so often that actually considering that they live separately is only for voter ID and bills. All 10 involved have, at separate times and individually, thought about the idea of creating a closed community that is pretty much self-sufficient. In years of knowledge, including extended periods of time under stress and in each other's hair, there have never been major arguments.

Now imagine this: This group of people learns of a piece of property that is a) large enough to permit the outdoor activities and separation that this group requires; b) can be subdivided within some limitations, c) is in a good, central location for people who work; d) has a present set of structures large enough to shelter those of the group that would need to move in immediately and can shelter those who would need temp space while additional buildings are being constructed.

This group is financially sound, has assets that are worth considerably more than the property's list price, and agrees that additional structures should be added, and agrees that stumbling distance is the proper distance for separate houses. The group is also very socially, personally and financially savvy, so building codicils into the terms of sale agreement to ensure future harmony is not terribly difficult.

Now imagine you're one of this group. The property is there, and within grasp. Carpe dieming would mean making some significant changes in lifestyle, while doing nothing doesn't decrease one's quality of life. Would you consider going into a group venture of this sort?

[NMDemDist2]

1. in a heartbeat

perhaps create a limited partnership?

but I'd do it

[wildeyed]

2. Sounds great.

The big question for me would be what happens if a family wants to move out? Do they sell their dwelling on the open market?

I have read about people doing this for retirement purposes. The idea being that they take care of each other as they age.

[Warpy]

3. I know one group like that outside Chapel Hill, NC

that has functioned well for many years. Well, decades. I know of another group on Cape Cod that is less cohesive and where members come and go that has stayed true to its original ideals for decades. There are land co ops all over the southwest, usually populated by trust fund hippies building alternative forms of housing, that are doing fairly well.

It can work. You do need to sit down and decide what you'd want out of such a group. You'll also want to build separate dwelling areas, even if there's a central kitchen, dining hall, meeting area, and what have you. People really do need to get away from each other from time to time.

The problems with the peace-love hippie communes in the 60s was that they all had a little too much togetherness and they hadn't worked out how to deal with the selfish or the lazy.

My suggestion is that you read up on land co ops and trusts. That seems to be the easiest way to deal with the legal BS.

Good luck.

[politicat]

12. Separate spaces - oh, yeah.

That's what we mean by stumbling distance -- close enough to get home along a reasonably well maintained path with a flashlight after having had a couple, but not so close that you have to smell each other's morning breath the day after the night before. I like my friends, but in general, I'm not much of a fan of humanity or people.

I've been reading on co-housing and coops for a while now, but trusts I hadn't considered. Thanks for the tip.

[TygrBright]

4. Grab while the grabbing is good!

But get a sympathetic lawyerly type to help set up a structure that protects everyone. I think communal living/housing projects like this are the wave of the future. I just wish that the people we would (ideally) do such a project with weren't, like us, mandated to a semi-gypsy existence for the next decade or so.

wistfully,
Bright

[Stinky The Clown]

5. I'd go for it .......

.... you have little to lose. The dirt will always be worth soemthing, even if everything fails.

I've always had a secret dream to do this with family. An 'Amish' kinda thing. Multiple generations and multiple family branches all living in a 'compound' of sorts.

[Kingshakabobo]

7. Me too...

I don't understand the obsession with getting away from family.

[Warpy]

8. You've obviously never met mine

[Mist]

10. LOL! "Family" isn't an unadulterated good thing for some of us. Warpy,

you mention that the hippies hadn't thought of how to deal with the lazy or selfish, but they also tended to forget about dealing with the silly practical everyday stuff, like who's turn is it to buy toilet paper, and do you need to label food in communal fridges to be sure someone doesn't eat your dinner for lunch. I haven't lived in an intentional community, but have lived with up to 5 of us in one house--it was enough to convice me that I'm a lone wolf. But this particular land deal sounds great, for those who have worked out the daily details of communal living.

[Stinky The Clown]

11. Hehehehe .... there's 'communal' and then there's **COMMUNAL**

In my own dream world, what I see is a single property with multiple self-contained dwellings, each with its own bathrooms, kitchens, private spaces, etc., *plus* some communal spaces. Think along the lines of a condo or townhouse or garden villa complex with a community pool and party room.

NO WAY could I live in the same actual house with those not in my nuclear family.

[politicat]

13. My family is utterly loony and unable to handle money, to boot.

I can't live with them - I've gotten very, very good at handling money and I insist on a level of savings and financial control that would destroy them, or else, we'd be supporting them and that would be VERY bad. My father has PTSD and situational psychosis and a couple of other, untreated, comorbid issues arising from his stint in Vietnam (he was a helicopter pilot doing medical evacuations on search and rescue... he still can't look at raw meat). My mother is, although an accountant, a terrible spender and has been through bankruptcy twice (once from my father's excesses, once from her late 2nd husband's medical bills). One sister is okay, but very aggressive; the other is a soft Republican. Living even within a few hundred yards of them would be far too much for me. I'd have to kill them, then feed the bodies to the pigs. And my husband's family is, if anything, worse....

My chosen kin are better for me.

[Lisa0825]

6. Sounds like an "intentional community."

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Intentional_community
An intentional community is a planned residential community with a much higher degree of social interaction than other communities. The members of an intentional community typically hold a common social, political or spiritual vision and share responsibilities and resources. Intentional communities include cohousing, residential land trusts, ecovillages, communes, kibbutzim, ashrams, monasteries and housing cooperatives.


I'd join one in a heartbeat if I had the opportunity. I will probably never marry again or have kids, so I do wonder sometimes who I will be able to rely on for help when I am older.

[Dora]

9. Most certainly.

[The empressof all]

14. Co Housing communities are on the rise

Here's a link that could be helpful in organizing. You want to make sure all the legalities are in place and you have agreements in writing.

http://www.cohousing.org/default.aspx

[hvn_nbr_2]

15. Sounds good but plan for the future

Sooner or later, some of your current group will die, marry or divorce or partner or de-partner, get transferred to another state, become too ill or injured to live independently, or something else. Plan now for how you'll allow property transfer and accept new residents/members.

[Nite Owl]

16. We've been talking about something

similar. The way I imagine it is a huge 'great house' where people meet at any time. Just one big room for crafts, projects etc, kitchen and long table for meals together. Around this room would be the satellite houses which would be small, maybe two bedrooms, small kitchens, basic stuff. There would of course be land for gardening and maybe some farm animals. This sort of just came up in talking that's as far as it has gone. Seems that many are looking towards the same way of living.