Here's what I sent:
"As my apprentice, you're never fired!"
"The real supreme court is up here!"
"If you must curse, use your own name!"
Have you seen these billboards on the county roads here in Warren? They are all black, with big white letters, and they all attribute these words, words that are not in the Bible, to "God".
The word apprentice is not in the bible once, but let's pretend that it was. It is a relief to know that, as God's apprentice, we can't fail. But what if we are successful? Could we eventually become masters? If we are indeed truly masterful, will we become equal to, or even replace God? Is business and power even an appropriate metaphor for how we should lead our spiritual lives? Is never firing employees an appropriate policy for a good business to have?
But, who paid for these billboards? What is their agenda? Is it a conservative attempt to overthrow the US Supreme Court, or a 'South Park Republican' attempt to people who "must curse"? Isn't that liberalism in sheep's clothing? Why don't they even list themselves on their own billboards? Don't they want to be listed on the right hand of God's billboards.
Maybe it is better they don't reveal themselves, so we are not tempted to judge the sinners along with their sin.
Here's the long version:
Something is not right about those billboards in Warren County that say "The real supreme court is up here!", "If you must curse, use your own name!", and "As my apprentice, you're never fired!". They are all black, with big white letters, and they are all attributed to "God".
Attributed to God: by the billboard...not the Bible. Putting words in God's mouth. Taking the lord's name in vain. Blasphemy.
Jesus did not insult tax collectors and sinners, or anybody else for that matter, even if they did sit in judgment of others' actions here on earth. Why would God? He wants thee to love thy neighbr as they self.
The word apprentice is not in the bible once. Introducing it in God's name raises all kinds of questions:
If we can fail as his apprentice without consequences, what if we are successful? Will we eventually learn to be a master of all that God has taught us? Will we learn enough about the word of God to go into business for ourselves? What about the competition? If we are indeed truly masterful, are we to become equal to, or even replace this God of whom we speak? Is that ultimately consistent with the first commandment, thou shalt have no other gods? Is business even an appropriate metaphor for how we should lead our spiritual lives? Is never firing employees an appropriate policy for a good business to have?
The first billboard about where the real supreme court is, seems to be all about the conservative agenda against 'activist judges'. But the second one -- If you must curse.. -- adopts a more permissive, liberal tone. In Matthew 5:34, Jesus says, "But I say unto you, Swear not at all." Why should God's law permit us to curse one of his children, even if it is ourself? Is this the marketing strategy the new 'South Park Republicans' book talks about?
Finally, who paid for these billboards? Is this group doing so humble a public service that they don't mind getting no credit for it? Why don't they want to be listed on the right hand of God’s billboards? Is signing your work a mere formality? Aren’t there reporting requirements for political ads? What would the real supreme court say?