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- you think socks are too formal for a Summer service. - you know at least 5 ways to say - Happy holidays! - your idea of a guy's night out is going to a N.O.W. rally. - unleavened bread is part of your Easter Brunch. - you refer to construction paper as "paper of color." - the name of your church is longer than your arm. - you find yourself rewriting a church survey, rather than taking it. - you call up your minister in the middle of the night, panicking because you are STARTING to believe in God. - to explain your personal theology, you have to use interpretive dance. - you take your day planner to church instead of the Bible. - you have ever been in an argument over whether or not breast milk is vegan. - when you dress for a formal evening out you wear a little black dress and Birkenstocks - you are unsure about the gender of God. - the money you sent to the Sierra Club last year was more than you spent on your mother at Christmas. - you think the Holy Trinity is "reduce, reuse and recycle." - you study the "ten suggestions" instead of the "Ten Commandments." - the only time "Jesus Christ" is mentioned at church is when someone trips or stubs a toe. - your child says to you before eating dinner at a friend's house "I'll remember to say my 'pleases' and 'thank yous' but I'm not going to say that dinner 'pledge of alliegance'." - You think a Holy day of Obligation is your turn to do coffee. - You get mail from committees you didn't know you were on. - You know at least two people who are upset that trees had to die for your church to be built.
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