Just found out that my hub's leaving.

[jojo54]

It's not really unexpected....we haven't been happy in many years. Sorry DU men, but he's a narcissist and a Scrooge. I did leave him about 6 yrs ago (did an 18 mth stint in N.H.) but let him back into my life. Then I realized what a BIG mistake that was. Anyway, the other day my very pregnant daughter let something slip and I deduced everything from there. Turns out she's rather pissed at her father for putting this extra stress on her (to not say anything to me). He really thinks he's going to hurt me by leaving but guess what???? NOT!!!

I felt guilty before because I'd been thinking "I just wish he wouldn't come home" and now my wish is coming true and I don't feel guilty anymore. I hope nobody thinks I'm cruel or crazy 'cause I'm not. I've just suffered (emotionally, not physically) for the better part of a 30 yr marriage and I'm tired of being told I don't know what I'm talking about, tired of being controlled and being put down every chance he got.

I'll be turning 51 shortly and I'll still have a good 20 years to GET MY LIFE BACK!!

Sorry for the rant. Thx for listening.
Jo

[knowbody0]

1. good luck JoJo54

Im 57 now and have spent the last three years alone. Believe it or not, I am sofa king HAPPY! I think about hooking up again but man oh man, COLD FEET! I actually do not feel the need. Life is good.

[jojo54]

2. That's great knowbody0.

You should be happy, just the way you are. That's why I say I'm taking back my life. I've lost "me" somewhere along the way because he wanted me to be somebody else (or a combination of several). Either way, I'm glad it's finally over - I can't wait until next month when he's alledgedly moving out. He told my daughter that he wants to wait until after my birthday (early Sept.). I say Please, don't do me any favors!!!

I think you'll know when the time is right to hook up again. Here's hoping the next one will be the real winner!!

[villager]

4. yeah, I didn't realize how much "territory" within myself I'd forfeited

...to try and make my marriage work, until my Ex bailed, and I was forced to do the "reclamation" work...

[LWolf]

3. I hope you'll be as content as I have been.

I was devastated by the break, and it took a couple of years to recognize that I actually liked being on my own. I haven't shut any doors, but at this point I am content, and don't have any time or space in my life to offer anyone else.

I hope your new life is as blessed as mine has been!