(Rant)- My bad day with migraines- and inhumanity

[ncrainbowgrrl]

I slumped down in front of CVS, having just thrown up two times- luckily not on myself either time. Once in a very public garbage can, and the other in a more out- of the way place...

I had just paid for frova out of pocket- waiting on preauth to come back into place- had thought it would be done by today (fun with insurance)
took one-went outside for head to clear before getting into the car.

15 minutes later, police cadets and their superiors come into the store

Oh, good, I thought. They should be able to help me up... I don't have the strength to get myself up right now.


Wrong.

I'm sitting up there, clutching my CVS bag and...- Extend a hand to one of 'em- the instructor- and ask for help. He may have thought I was asking for money... but even still...

Try again. No luck

Multiply this by like 12 attempts. I'm on the sidewalk. Next to the gum, near the ants- going marching two by two, hurrah, hurrah. I have wires on me- but they're not going to my ears- they obviously scream medical device- don't they?

Finally, I take the bag, and with all of the strength I can muster, ask the last one- "Help, please- I have a medical condition- I can't get up- but I can stand if I get help up." He reaches down and helps me up. His superiors are staring ahead- as if I wasn't a person- or if they wouldn't have instructed him to touch me... as if I were toxic. But this young cadet did help me up. I thanked him. He said "glad to help, ma'am."

What the heck. Why did this happen? Invisible illness problem? Did they think I was enjoying sitting there, reading the tabloid headlines through the CVS glass door.

I got in my car- head resolving in the next 3 minutes to the point where driving back to work was okay. But, peeved. And then, what did I see? The same cadets in their cars ahead of me on the way back to work. Laughing and talking inside their private cars... One cadet turned back to see me behind him. I know he saw me- 'cause the rest of the car turned their heads. And I saw the one who had helped me- giving me a half wave. I nodded back at him and gave the same tentative half wave.

Still. The whole experience left me with more of a bad taste in my mouth... worse than that of the original bile from the migraine.

[hyphenate]

1. I'm sorry to hear of your headache

Migraines are rough--I used to have them on top of the tension headaches. But since I've been taking propranolol, a beta-blocker, they have subsided (I take it for a fast heartbeat mostly). I'm not positive, but I believe they make a migraine formula as well if it helps.

As noted in another post, I've been falling a lot myself. Thankfully, people here are a lot more helpful! I gave up being embarassed about it because if I fall, I fall--nothing I can really do about it. I fell 3 times on one day! The last one in public happened at the hospital and I had at the very least 5 or 6 people trying to help me. They gave me a wheelchair to sit in and I used it for the rest of the afternoon that I was in there.

If I fall at home, it's a different matter. It means I need to find a way up without help, which can be a real pain.

If you are able to, keep a phone with you all the time. I know that one of these days I'm going to really need help and I'm going to have to call for it. It will likely be in private, because I am so fortunate to have people who are willing to help.

[ncrainbowgrrl]

2. yeah- I tried that beta blocker...

whoa. Hospital ER time- dangerously low heartbeat and BP.

I'm normally mildly tachy... (just the way I am) so, that low of a heart rate had the doctors racing with the 02, and the EKG stuff...and a nice night's stay in the ER. :eyes:

Glad it helps you, though.

I did have a phone on me- but if I called someone of my coworkers or friends to help me up, it would be a little ridiculous, as we were 10-20 minutes away from work or friends' places.... it was all about getting a stranger to help.

[murielm99]

4. Propanolol may require a period of adjustment.

I had a problem with bradycardia when I first took it. It really scared me, after years of a rapid heartbeat.

Then, I made a mistake with my meds one night. For some reason, I was disoriented, and took a second dose of all my meds in the middle of the night. I had to go to the ER at four in the morning. I thought it was safer to go in the ambulance in case my heart stopped. They were actually more worried about the coumadin than the other stuff.

The doctor put me on a different does of propanolol, and it is working out better.

[ncrainbowgrrl]

6. I can see how it may require adjustment for some folks.

However, the kind folks in the ER and my Neuro were adamant about my trial period having ended that very night. I was also on a VERY small dose of it at the time... so there was really no room to titrate down... It was a "Get her off this- yes?" "Yes!"

Very glad it's helping you though!!

[flamingyouth]

3. That's horrible - I'm so sorry.

:hug:

Do you have a medical alert bracelet?

And ugh - paying for Frova out of pocket. I did that once. :wow:

I hope you feel better today. :hug:

[ncrainbowgrrl]

5. Yeah, I do have a medic alert bracelet.

Unfortunately, I need to get a new plate for it, as I now have had some VERY scary issues with topical "caine" products... and this needs to be Widely Sprawled on my body....

I'm gonna wind up getting some of the frova money back, i think... i have finally gotten things straightened out with my insurance carrier, and my preauth has been backdated. After seeing Sicko last night, I started crying, thinking just about how I was g to be denied my meds so that some person could be rewarded with more stock options. It took almost 3 hours on the phone, and a very long story....