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Because of the depression and a hundred other things, I went back to a therapist last winter. The problem for me is that there are too many calamities all happening either concurrently or right after each other.
Well, the new guy and me didn't quite work out, and yesterday, I told him I quit. First of all, I cited the Fibro/CFS for making me constantly, which is true. I told him I wanted to have some kind of peace and quiet, with no obligations for a little while.
This is one of the problems I have with people--they just don't understand that if you are trying to achieve some semblance of normality and have a condition that keeps you from having real sleep, you want the ability to sleep when you should, and not when you shouldn't. The ex-doc unfortunately is attributing the desire to sleep as depression, and says I still need "help."
He kept telling me that I seem to avoid problems by refusing to discuss them. I think we ALL have some secrets that we don't want to discuss with anyone, and that even goes for seeing a shrink. People like this doc take everything you say trying to find the hidden motives behind it, and that's not the real problem. I began to go to him because of the physical problems which keep growing in my life, as well as all the other shit in my life. I've been forthright about many things, but there are some things I would rather keep to myself. There aren't a lot of these things, but they're simply none of his business, and they aren't blocking me from getting somewhere. BTW, politics is one of the things I want to discuss, and he won't go into that, which is likely one of the things I have to talk about and get off my chest. The therapist I had 3 years ago was great--I could talk about so much with him, and I hated to see him leave. I needed a sounding board then, and that's what I need now and what I wasn't getting.
Anyway, sleepiness tends to creep up on me quite frequently when it shouldn't, and yet I spend a great deal of time during the night with NO sleeping. I need to reset the internal clock and get myself back to normal with the main intention to get off the damned sleeping pills if possible. And that can be achieved as I slowly bring myself back to a real schedule.
Sorry if I'm rambling--it's just after noon and I can barely keep my eyes open.
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