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pinerow Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Sep-09-07 02:38 PM
Original message
Who Gives a Shit!
Who Really Cares!
© Ramón Piñero 9/9/2007



Who really
gives a shit
when the
pretty talking
blonde hair
on television
assures the world
that our allies
have ‘tremendously’
assisted US
in searching for
the alleged
Bin laden.

The hills
between
Afghanistan
and Pakistan,
always been
home to today’s
newly minted
bogey-man.


Who really
gives a shit
when a ‘surge’
is much like
getting a
stiff one
up your
rear end
and nobody
kisses you
and gets ready
to ‘surge’ again.

Who gives a shit,
when almost
4000
little boys
and little girls,
moms’ and dads’
are now lost ones
snuck under
cover of night
so that the
public misses
out on that
great American
tradition of
honoring its’
dead, or
when thousands
return without their
OEM.
(you know
arms and legs
little toes and
fingers, gray
matter oozing
through
bandages and
gauze)
The standing
order is to
get them well
enough to send
them home,
to empty streets
and empty lives.

Who gives a shit
that there are
71000
‘confirmed’ dead
Iraqi civilians,
little boys and
little girls
mom’s and dad’s.
just like
you and me
only maybe
a little less
concerned
about the
latest Lohan
and Hilton
soap operas.

On page 12
of the
New York Times
below the
half page ad
for the newest
IPhone and ITouch
seven American
boys died in
Iraq,
and Britney is
all over the
evening news.


and you
really must
ask yourself.
Who gives a shit!













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shenmue Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Sep-19-07 05:43 AM
Response to Original message
1. Lame.
These days, people mistake any poorly written sentence with lots of line breaks in it for poetry.

If it wouldn't make sense as something other than a poem, it's not going to make sense as one.
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LisaM Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Sep-20-07 04:45 PM
Response to Reply #1
2. What., are you just going into every thread here and snarking?
People have posted lots worse poems than this. I agree it looks like an early draft, but why so dismissive? Isn't the point of a poetry FORUM to give constructive criticism, or have good dialogue? There's lots of good material in this poem that could be distilled down to something quite potent and good.

Remind me never to post any of my poems.
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