Hello all, I have been out of town for a little while, thus no posts. I am fine and still sober, thanks for the PM's checking up on me!
I have not posted before now about another sobriety group I have been attending because I wanted to really get a sense of what they were about. The group is LifeRing Secular Sobriety: www.unhooked.com . I was referred to it by one of the Grandmas in my G'ma/G'pa AA group -- her daughter-in-law attends, and she took me aside at the last meeting and gave me a brochure and told me that the group might be a good "fit" for me -- and then spent the next 10 minutes trying to assure me that she wasn't suggesting that I stop attending their group, "heavens NO!" just that this other group might be a good supplement. It is not a 12 step group.
Well, she was 100% on the money. Before the first meeting, I checked out the website and ordered their "workbook" called "Recovery by Choice." I am about halfway through it and I must tell you, I have never been forced to confront my drinking like this book is forcing me to confront it. Check out the table of contents and worksheets:
http://lifering.com/workbook/workbookTOC.pdfYes, it is really detailed and totally geeky, but you know what? I need that. I'm a lawyer, reading and writing and examination and written regurgitation are my life. I am also a visual and written learner: If I do not write it down, I will not remember it. So, this workbook has been a great tool for me thus far. I would note that worksheet 8-10 "Summing up my drinking/using career" was a scant one page. They encourage you to make photocopies of the page if you need more space. Um, yeah. The copier at the far corner of Kinko's was where I made my additional copies! If I was going to do it, I was going to write down EVERYTHING.
This group meets in my area every Tuesday night. Everyone sits in a circle, and the moderator says "So, how was your week?" The participants then relate their week and their challenges and successes in avoiding drugs or alcohol. People jump in with suggestions for strategies in situations to avoid using. "Drinkalogues" (tales of past using) are not encouraged. The focus is on the now, your personal experiences in the past week, and your plans and strategies for recovery. I have been to three meetings and by the second one, I really felt I had found a home. By the second meeting, the group had covered strategies for many of my trigger social events (charity functions, political fundraisers, business dinners) and I had filled pages of my little "emergency book" with great tips for alcohol avoidance. I also encountered a few people at this meeting who I KNEW in my profession, (and if you've been following my posts, you know that this was one of my greatest horrors) including a prominent Judge who helped start the local LifeRing chapter, and they treated me just like they would have if they had seen me in court. "Oh, hey! Great to see you! Have a seat yet -- there's one over here." One particularly hard-ass female legal adversary of mine saw my eyes tear up and she said "If I'm nice to you, you'll cry. You're fine. You're here. Cut it out. My number is in the contact list." Exactly what I needed. Exactly.I pulled myself together and enjoyed the meeting.
I would note that there is ZERO AA bashing in this group. Many, if not most, attend or attended AA. But this fills a niche for me, and it is helping, so I wanted to share. The group emphasizes that even if there is no local chapter in your area, you can benefit from the workbook (which I highly recommend)and from the online resources.
I have reported back to the G'mas/G'pas, and they are very supportive of my efforts with LifeRing. If anyone has any questions, fire away. I've only been to three meetings, but I am very, very encouraged by my experiences.
Much love, MBD.
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