Third Step Hell. Or Letting go with Clawmarks...

[RetroLounge]

Anyone else have this problem with letting something go, turning something over? Anyone who doesn't? :D

I have a very complicated situation in my life and and can't seem to just be in the moment and turn it over to HP.

I'm struggling...

RL

[KitchenWitch]

1. In my humble experience

nothing worthwhile that I ever let go of was without clawmarks. I tend to fight the spiritual stuff tooth and nail.

In those instances, I ask for willingness to let go...

[RetroLounge]

2. and that is where I am.

asking for willingness and help.

:hi:

RL

[KitchenWitch]

3. May you be bestowed with all the willingness you need!

:hug:

[RetroLounge]

4. Thanks!

It's getting, if not easier, less chaotic...

:hug:

RL

[ismnotwasm]

5. Well, if you turn it over

And you don't let go, you're hanging upside down.:hug:
Happens to me all the time. Amazing what happens when I get out of my own way. (Sigh) Rough, though.
I will give you an example: My husband has MS. It's sloooowly progressing. I lose little, tiny pieces of him every day. Now we fight this with everything we have, and sometimes make progress, but the ultimate outcome is out of my hands. I turn this over every single fucking day, and as you can tell by my language, I don't like it. Nor am I good at it all the time. But let go I do, it's that, or go insane. Life on life's terms does suck sometimes. My husband is my hero. And he's been sober a long time.

[RetroLounge]

6. "Life on life's terms does suck sometimes"

I gave a lead on this very topic last week.

Let go or go insane, so very true.

Thanks!

:hi:

RL

[NMDemDist2]

7. just my experience with the 3rd step. It's a decision, that's all.

no action needed, just decide.

"but I keep thinking about it!!" you wail,

opps! apologize to God for taking it back and make the decision again. repeat as needed (up to 120 times an hour) until you get tired of apologizing, or, (horrors!) you do the 4th and 5th step on that situation.

remember the 4th step is being "in the problem" so try not to spend too much time there. line out the problem, find your part in it (fear, self seeking, selfishness or dishonesty are your choices-see page 67 in the BB) then find a friend to talk it over with to make sure you aren't fooling yourself.

IMHE, once I see my part I can start to let go because I see why I am allowing the situation to rule me (see steps 6&7).

the steps aren't some theory, they are practical actions we can take to help us in our daily life.

Simple, absolutely. Easy?? hmmm not so much, until you have some practice doing them over and over and over, every day until it becomes habit. once you can do the steps in 10 minutes on any topic in your life, that's when you start to "step out easy" and life changes.

keep on keeping on, and try using the tools that have been laid at your feet. It may surprise you !! :hug:

[Joe Chi Minh]

8. I found it helpful to reflect that what was required, was not for me

to do something, but rather to not do something. Idleness has always had some appeal to me... An easier decision, in a way; a continuation of the status quo, and just hanging in!