Dr. "Flat Affect" and Mr. "Hammered"

[Cats Against Frist]

I just have a question -- for anyone out there who is a former, or struggling alcoholic, or is an addiction counselor, or lives with an alcoholic:

My boyfriend is a high-functioning alcoholic -- well, sort of high-functioning. He manages to maintain a great job, with a great salary, despite the fact that 2-3 nights a week, he stays up, all night, and gets blotto. The problem is, that often, when he's NOT drunk, or recovering, he's like a fucking zombie -- the clinical term being having a "flat affect," completely lacking the ability to even speak or carry on a conversation. There are obviously times when he's "recovering," from a hangover, that he's lazy and sick and lays around, but his motivation is always pretty shitty, and sometimes, he can barely move his mouth. On the other hand, when he's drunk, he can be expressive, talkative and even a bit affectionate.

My questions are: has anyone else dealt with this -- especially anyone who may have often been in that state, who has "kicked" it, and can provide some insight into what's going on in his mind, when he acts like the walking dead? And, is this symptom more common of depression, rather than straight-up alcoholism? Do you think a bit of the ol' pharma would help? Is there anyone who has found a way to deal, effectively, with someone like this?

[KitchenWitch]

1. Are you sure he is an alcoholic

He almost sounds bi-polar to me. Some bi-polars use alcohol to slow down the mania as a self medication type thing.

[NMDemDist2]

2. there was a study I read once that showed alkies got the postive

effects of alchol quickly but it drops off just as quickly. we actually functioned worse as the booze dropped out of our systems fast rather than the tapered line of a "normal" drinker

an alky is more likely to fail a "sobriety test" sober than if he was drunk

alkies are weird that way....

[ismnotwasm]

3. I had a lecture on that very topic

Guy was going over substance abuse in general, but when he got to alcoholism, he said that hard core alcoholics function very well at blood alcohol levels of about .20. In fact when the level starts dropping below that, all kinds of mental and emotional problems can start, and well as acute withdrawal symptoms.

[Joe Chi Minh]

4. Is it possible to be a high-functioning alcoholic?

I mean, not recovering.

Heavy-drinking, yes. Alcoholic, I can't see it. Though I'm not saying heavy drinking can't be problem.

[KitchenWitch]

5. My dad was a high functioning alcoholic until he got into recovery

when I was 17

[mirandaod]

6. Yes, because it's a progressive disease.

I stopped drinking while still high-functioning. I was on the way to not functioning at all. Thankfully, I didn't have to ride the train to the end. I've met lots of people like me in recovery, and many who have lost everything.

[Joe Chi Minh]

7. Well, I suppose it makes sense that it would be progressive,

and there would be a critical change-over point.

[ismnotwasm]

8. Absolutely

Being a "low bottom" drunk myself, I couldn't see it for a year or two. (working got in the way of drinking time) But I've met cops whose stories include doing their job handing out DUI's, and then go drink themselves into liver failure after work. It's a very creepy disease.

[yardwork]

9. My dad was a high-functioning alcoholic who died at age 63

of cancer of the liver.

[TrogL]

10. I'm wondering if there's some autistic-spectrum stuff going on

or some sort of social avoidance phobia.

I'm an Aspie and would have similar problems. Booze would help me overcome socialization problems make me more outgoing (often to the point of being obnoxious) and then I would need "downtime" after.