Finding One's "Right Place" in the working world. Is it even possible for many people?

[Wapsie B]

I'm 50 years old and have never felt like I am where I belong. I've not had this aha! moment where I know that I'm doing fulfills me. I can't fake the unbridled enthusiasm I see in so many others in my field (polysomnography). Opportunities that seem to come to others so easily have been completely out of my grasp. I've done this job to death and I feel empty. I'd like something much more creative, more artistic in nature than dealing with docs and patients and MBA's all day, or all night as the case may be. What I wouldn't have given for a little encouragement here or there from a teacher or someone who saw something in me that I need to develop.

That's why in a number of ways in life I deal with a sense of bitterness about having busted my hump and still not being where I want to be, that is having a career that I love. I see others who are younger than I already having a nice college teaching job or a successful business of their own; having overcome many personal hardships along the way. So I know things are possible. That possibility is the only thing keeping me going somedays. But enough with the possibilities. I want my dream job in reality. I've waited long enough for it. But what is that dream job? The inability to even formulate a concrete goal to work for is frustrating the hell outta me. I've read the books. I've done the career counseling and I'm no further ahead than I was before.

[Manifestor_of_Light]

1. No. This society does not support creative people.

Or people with any kind of imagination. It wants bean counters and boring conformists.

I'm a creative person who unfortunately got degrees in boring shit due to parental pressure..
Now I'm old enough to do what I want.

[CBHagman]

2. This is not meant as a pat answer, but you have company.

I'm also in transition, trying to find what it is I should be doing all day, and ruminating over various decisions, life-changing events, the why of how I got where I am now.

In case you were wondering, yes, I've had the career counseling, taken the various inventories and tests, queried people about their jobs, and I'm still looking.

My anger keeps me going, and so does the sure knowledge that the status quo is unacceptable. I can also say that I've found allies in strange places, and perhaps not in the form I expected.

Dear bushwentawol, if at all possible, please limit your exposure to pessimists. They are energy vampires and will suck it right out of you.

Do you have any sort of support in your life right now, such as a trusted colleague or a friend with a ready ear? Or are you seeking your support here? I'd say several layers of support help.

If you want to brainstorm or something, feel free to PM me.

[Tripper11]

3. I was in a job/company that was thr right place and I didn't know it...

until I switched and went down the street to the competition. I didn't burn any bridges and was actually told by my manager that I was welcome back if things didn't work out.
Well....it's not looking great right now...see my post here

[ramapo]

4. Making a change in mid-life is harder than I'd thought

bushwentawol...I know exactly what you're saying, especially the empty feeling that you describe. I'm a couple of years older than you and have spent the last few years ruminating on what to do next with my life, something satisfying and rewarding.

I've always had a concrete "next" goal. From college through a couple of different jobs to raising a family and sending the kids to college. I'm pretty much done with all those responsibilities and have been trying to figure out what to do with the rest of my life. But I've been unable to find something that I can latch on to.

I'm in the computer business, which I've grown to despise, for a variety of reasons. I spend most of each day with a headache, a pit in my stomach, and a brain churning through just what the hell can I do next. It even spills over to the weekends now. My position now isn't terrible, some might even think it wonderful. I get decent money and don't have to do a whole lot, although that it part of the problem.

I've thought about going back to school but it doesn't really seem practical to do it in order to start a new career. I'm most interested in the outdoors, ecology, geography, archeology, recent history of my area, and sustainable development. I do some volunteer work with our local trail conference and animal shelter but neither really translates into a full-time job.

I've always been able to see my next goal and figure out a way to get to it. Like you I've been completely unable to formulate that next step. Sometimes I think I should just quit what I'm doing and maybe the shock of that will stir something up. A sense of responsibility has kept me from doing just that.

What makes it worse is hearing about or reading about the many people who have made a change, sometimes a very gutsy change and have achieved some satisfaction. That just makes me beat myself up all the more and say to myself, what is my friggin problem???

I'm wondering how you're doing with your search.

[Wapsie B]

5. ramapo and everyone else, career-wise I am stuck in the same place I've been since forever.

I am going through a divorce and still haven't got all the final details worked out. But at least I'm feeling better about day to day life while living alone. I am wanting to move out of the area and have gone on a couple interviews but still in the same field. I have all but given up trying to find this mythical "right place" for me. I've had a hard time dealing with the bitterness of not really having had any life direction given to me, certainly not by any teacher I've ever had. I know those who are identified as "gifted" in some way get encouraged to do this or that. Maybe some see themselves as being pushed into something that's not for them; ie: coming from a family of doctors so it's expected that they'll be a doctor as well. But me? I'm empty.

What kills me is the hearing of these motivational speakers talk about the world being my oyster, about how I can be anything I want to be. But I have no idea as to what that is. If I could formulate a goal I'd have something to work for. But I've got nothing.
To me the most difficult exercise I've ever had to do is to answer the question of who gave me direction in life and what did they do and say? I've not been able to answer that question. I don't believe that anyone has been truly able to reach me.

[raccoon]

6. About finding one’s “right place” in the working world,

if you mean finding a career/job that one loves AND makes a good salary at, AND has good benefits, then I’d say, for sure, that’s not going to be possible for some—I’d say most--people.

I’m in my mid-50’s, now happily underemployed, working with community college students.

I was looking for a job about a decade ago, and job seeking really sucks. IME, if you want a good job—good pay and benefits—you gotta have the contacts.

Once in a while, I read about an older person or a retired person going back to school and learning to do something else, but they seem to end up doing volunteer work or something close to it with the new skill(s).

I think that especially in this day and time, when people are laid off at the drop of a hat, many of us would benefit from finding our fulfillment outside of work. That way, if you lose your job, it wouldn’t be as much of a blow as when you’ve got so much emotionally invested in it.