Fake Headline: V.P. Dick Cheney Killed by Covey of Quail

[Philosoraptor]

Vice President of the United States Dick Cheney was killed Sunday is what is being described as a freak hunting accident. "One minute he was doing what he loved, and the next minute he was dead", said a witness to the quail attack.

"Human fatalities from quail attacks although rare do occur, there are 27 recorded incidents of quail related deaths going back to 1783", said an expert on animal attacks in the U.S.

Mr. Cheney was survived by a wife, Lynne and two adult daughters.
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Now, how will DU react to this headline when it is a little realer? Some will admit hatred of the man in life or death, some will point out the many deaths he decreed for profit, and a few will say they are diminished by any man's death, while a few others will scold those who do not obey the unwritten rules of grieving.

I for one will celebrate, and I will save my grief for a fellow human being, of which dick cheney gave up any claim of being decades ago. I will speak ill of dick when he croaks, I just want to say that up front. When reagan the monster croaked, I rejoiced as well.

How we behave when someone dies, wheather the deceased be benevolent or monstrous is a personal decision ultimately, no one can dictate to you how to behave or speak of the recently departed. I owe no one any respect simply because they died like I too must die, they must have earned my respect for me to grieve their passing.

[TomInTib]

1. I am with you 100 percent.

Well put.

[spindrifter]

2. Can anyone name a kind thing that the old buzzard did?

[DRoseDARs]

3. Well, he was nice enough NOT to kill the guy he shot.

That has got to count for something, right? :shrug:

[MrModerate]

4. Sure he's a shithead, but it's hardly useful . . .

From a political point of view, that is, to glory in his demise prematurely. Let's not make it any easier for the 'Licans to get their base out in November by painting Dems as bloodthirsty cranks.

With regard to Reagan, I neither celebrated or mourned his death, but I was thoroughly disgusted by his elevation to sainthood, which was both historically unsupportable and morally repugnant.

[orpupilofnature57]

6. I Agree Ronnie-Rayguns ,gave it back to the pirates and ShrubCo

[orpupilofnature57]

5. A figure head of covert associations and presumed authority ,Villain!

Where was dick nov.22 1963?

[mcscajun]

7. It is not for the person that respect is asked, but for the fact of their

death. There is a difference. "If you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all" applies to any person in death...at least for a 'decent interval'.

At least wait until the funeral is past. Sheesh.

[ComerPerro]

8. This thread is anything but productive

[razors edge]

9. i agree

but its GD so who cares right? besides, he'll be whisked away to an undisclosed location to hang out with ken lay anyway.

[Javaman]

10. Backup story in case Harry Whittington died from Chaney shot...

Fellow Hero Hunter give life to save VP
Feb 12 3:45 PM US/Eastern

Washington

Vice President Dick Chaney's life was saved today after a flock of wild quail attacked him.

Fellow hunter Harry Whittington, 78 standing nearby when a group of rabid quail suddenly and quite deliberately attacked the Vice President.

With total disregard for his own safety, Whittington, rushed to Chaney's aid and distracted the furious fowl. Pushing Mr. Chaney out of the way, Whittington, took the brunt of the attack.

Witnesses say that the poor man was pecked to death. The incident left Whittington with thousands of tiny "holes" all over his body from the beaks of the quail.

Later, Katharine Armstrong, owner of the Armstrong ranch stated, those quail can be quite tough, as evident from the outrageous display of their temperament.

Scotty McClellen at his Monday morning press briefing said that, "quails are now are number one enemy. Like pigeons, they can be trained and we have a firm belief that the ones that attacked the VP on Saturday, were al Queda trained. They will stop at nothing".

The quails are small, plump tasty terrorist trained birds. They are meat eaters, but will also take on politician's and similar small spineless prey. They nest in spider holes and caves.

(I wrote this a while back)