New terrorist movement--warning

[Viva_La_Revolution]

NEW YORK -- A public school teacher was arrested today at John F. Kennedy International Airport as he attempted to board a flight while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a set square, a slide rule and a calculator.

At a morning press conference, Attorney General Alberto Gonzales said he believes the man is a member of the notorious Al-gebra movement. He did not identify the man, who has been charged by the FBI with carrying weapons of math instruction.

"Al-gebra is a problem for us," Gonzales said. "They desire solutions by means and extremes, and sometimes go off on tangents in search of absolute values. They use secret code names like 'x' and 'y' and refer to themselves as 'unknowns', but we have determined they belong to a common denominator of the axis of medieval with
coordinates in every country. As the Greek philanderer Isosceles used to say, 'There are 3 sides to every triangle'."

When asked to comment on the arrest, President Bush said, "If God had wanted us to have better weapons of math instruction, He would have given us more fingers and toes."

White House aides told reporters they could not recall a more intelligent or profound statement by the President.














:rofl: Thanks PDXBara!

[tuvor]

1. That's just paranoid and crazy!

Now, if he'd been carrying a compass...

[lvx35]

2. hehe! Gotta recommend that!

Just came from a long math study session to DU to get my mind off it, and I run into this. ...Hillarious!!! :lol:

[Kutjara]

3. I love it!

"Weapons of math instruction." Genius.

[silverweb]

4. LMAO

My daughter recently finished her very last college math requirement forever, so we immensely enjoyed that!

:rofl:

[TomInTib]

5. The problem is with them durned philanderers

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_mesg&forum=132&topic_id=2812972&mesg_id=2812972

[Olney Blue]

6. that's funny!

[cascadiance]

7. They also thought they saw a mask like my avatar and the letter V too...

... but they won't tell you that!... The code name "v" is still not talked about openly! :+

[Rainscents]

8. LOL

Very funny! :rofl:

[Bluebear]

9. Don't forget their 'allied' organization Al Manac.

Very dangerous fringe organization that teaches geography so the masses know you are invading the wrong countries.

[Viva_La_Revolution]

10. am kick!

:donut:

[Coexist]

11. *snort*

thanks for the laugh!

[Sydnie]

12. tee hee!!!

Love it!!! Thanks Viva! kick and rec'd.

[soup]

13. Love it!

:rofl: thank you!

[GeorgeGist]

14. But those rules that slide...

are the worst of all.

[Kurovski]

15. Even though I've been terrorised by math my entire life,

this was pretty funny! K&R.

[Recursion]

16. Hmmm...

...you know, Muhammad ibn Muusa al-Khwarismi, who founded al-gebra, was an Iranian... how deep does this rabbit hole go?