Would you hang a family "portrait" like this in your home?

[LibDemAlways]

This is the "portrait" that hangs in the Virginia home of Sen. George Macaca Allen. The tv tuned to FOX is just beyond the pale. And how about the bar setting? What would his loyal fundie fans think?




The link below provides more info. This is not a joke. The "artist" has a variety of backdrops he sketches people into. Allen (or somebody) paid money for this monstrosity.
(My earlier post on the same topic sank like a rock, but I thought you all should see this for some comic relief.)

http://www.wonkette.com/politics/george-allen/george-allen's-family-portrait-198490.php

[xxqqqzme]

1. is that real - I mean is it really

hanging on a wall in his house - did he pay football or something? you're supposed 2 have a volleyball @ the beach.

[LibDemAlways]

13. It is real and it hangs in his house. The football

is because his dad was an NFL coach and the name recognition got him into politics. Each family member is depicted doing what they enjoy. That must mean his wife enjoys sitting at bars with her little daughter. All three of Allen's kids, by the way, are named for his favorite Confederate heroes. Son Forrest is named for Nathan Forrest, early KKK Grand Wizard. I personally think the entire family should have been depicted wearing sheets.

[Bunny]

46. Your post has given me uncontrollable giggles.

"That must mean his wife enjoys sitting at bars with her little daughter." :rofl:

[kilgore65]

98. That 'art' tells me one thing...

Allen is a major asshole... sheesh...

[Tandalayo_Scheisskopf]

2. It cries out for the special touch of...

Black Velvet.

[elehhhhna]

76. Why is Jennifer Aniston (orange dress) in his family portrait?

What a perv.

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

3. Well, my parents have family photos of all of us drinking up...

but they're not hideous paintings. And we're not fundies, we're Irish.

[The_Casual_Observer]

4. Sure, if I was out of my mind.

It looks like an Al Jaffee Mad Magazine fold in. I wonder what the message is? "I hate n***gers" perhaps?

[elehhhhna]

78. Check out the sleeves on Macaca's shirt.

[mike_c]

5. that is hideous....

Call me an art snob, but that is awful. He HUNG it? OMFG. I don't know where to start....

[doubleplusgood]

6. paint by number? n/t

[Proud2BAmurkin]

7. BWAAA notice the TV has FOX NEWS on?

:rofl:

[Kingshakabobo]

21. Holy shit. You are right. These people never quit. nt

[MnFats]

8. does he also have a velvet Elvis? Or...

...the lovely set of dogs playing cards?

[haele]

9. The TV's tuned to Fox?

Eeuyk, this looks worse than anything Rodney Dangerfield's charactor in Caddyshack would have.
I've seen magazine ads for punch or lunchmeat in the 70's with more class.

Haele

[OnyxCollie]

10. It looks like the artwork at my favorite Mexican restaurant. nt

[LibDemAlways]

11. It's real all right.

The "artist" has lots more like this. LOL

[OnyxCollie]

14. Oh, jeebus! I saw that "artist" at a community art show.

He proudly showed us one of his "works" to convince my girlfriend and I to buy. It was some hideous painting of a girl standing in front of three different landmarks that he was so willing to cram together into one composite.

"That's um... nice."

We tried not to laugh. Honest.

[LibDemAlways]

16. Here's the guy's website featuring the Allen family

http://www.davidcochran.com/pages/fys.htm


I just can't get over how utterly crass this is. You've got to figure the guy must live in a spectacular home. And he sticks that on the wall? Hysterical.

[madrchsod]

18. good god that guy is awful!

people actually pay money for that crap...

[mike_c]

19. oh man, Dave Cochran is really bad....

He's been doing that for 29 years?! And making a living? Astounding.

[LunaSea]

32. AAAAAAAIIIIGGGGHHHH!

My Eyes............
Don't click that link....it struck me blind!

[Crankie Avalon]

70. You'd think a person would have only one "painting" this ghastly in them

...but he finds a way to keep up the pace and never, ever flag as each one is just as grotesque as the last.

[LibDemAlways]

73. That bottom picture is beyond hideous. Who'd want

a "portrait" hanging in their home that includes a sign pointing to a bathroom? And look at the size of those ice cream cones? Those kids will need that bathroom big time I guess. And mom and dad look like they're taking a break from posting on Free Republic. That is one fucked up POS.

[Goblinmonger]

91. DId you check the pricing?

It STARTS at $4400. I mean seriously, it isn't even sofa-sized for that money.

[lpbk2713]

12. Everyone is smiling....... Are they idiots?

You know what they say about people who always smile at nothing in particular.

[Contrary1]

15. This portrait measures 4ft x 5ft...

"Prices are determined by the size and the number of people to be included. Prices begin at $4400. for a 3ft x 4ft painting." :wow:

http://www.davidcochran.com/pages/fysinfo.htm

[The_Casual_Observer]

17. That's actually very cheap. It looks like he projects photographs

on a canvas sort of like Andy Warhol used to do. The difference being that Warhol used more interesting subjects, like old cans.

[LunaSea]

34. very cheap.

the marginally talented can buy all the gear they need for that at a "seminar" in some hotel function space.

[Bluebear]

35. 'Warhol used more interesting subjects, like old cans.'

Oh. My. God. I love ya.

[Bluebear]

20. Is this on velvet by chance? nt

[Tom Yossarian Joad]

22. OMG! You have put me off of booze for a week with that!

[Luna_Chick]

29. I think I'd need to be shitfaced just to like it

Pass me a bottle..quick..before I claw my eyes out.

[magellan]

23. The perspective is awful, the colors and rendering are cartoonish

...and the proportion is off. The artist is over the top into symbology; what's up with the single high-heeled sandal with the bird sitting on it? In memoriam, the one-legged lady??

Well, at least we know how FAUX News rates with the Allen family. Family time for Repugs appears to require hate spewing in the background.

[badgerpup]

24. Style reminds me of a kid's bible story book I saw once...

You know, the kind where everyone is white?
And the Garden of Eden pic has Adam clean-shaven with short hair and Eve looking like she's fresh from a salon (only they left her hair down for that 'natural' look)?
And the pic where people are being welcomed into 'Heaven' by their loved ones, everyone is wearing 1950's clothing and Stepford smiles...
:puke:

[LibDemAlways]

47. I e-mailed this pic to a friend and that was

his impression too - like this is some weird heaven thing with all the Allens as they would like to be remembered. Bizarre.

[badgerpup]

25. Style reminds me of a kid's bible story book I saw once...

You know, the kind where everyone is white?
And the Garden of Eden pic has Adam clean-shaven with short hair and Eve looking like she's fresh from a salon (only they left her hair down for that 'natural' look)?
And the pic where people are being welcomed into 'Heaven' by their loved ones, everyone is wearing 1950's clothing and Stepford smiles...
:puke:

[marions ghost]

31. yep

that is exactly the genre. Shudder

[Broken_Hero]

26. Nah, to tacky for me nt

[VolcanoJen]

27. Why does George Allen look like he's 20 years old?

Just sayin'...

[Bluebear]

33. LOL! Thought the same thing...

Who is this, George Jr. back from freshman year at Bob Jones U?

He probably commissioned the "artist" to make him look all young and virile.

[aaronbees]

28. Has that weird "Rapture glow" to it

WTF??!! I'm surprised it doesn't have black servants in the background serving sweet tea and some "Girls Gone Wild" ladies ogling Allen. Everyone has a dumb and dumber-esque smile, and it looks like Allen's "package" was embellished. The perspective is strange, as if it's all seen through one too many martinis. Truly dreadful all around.

[VolcanoJen]

36. It does, it does, in that "really bad folk-art" kind of way

Hard to believe someone would pay for something that looks no better than a velvet Last Supper, ya know?

[aaronbees]

37. Too true

Except really bad folk art can sometime be interesing. This, well, it just gives me the creeps. Like his taste in politics, Allen's taste in art seems to be trashy. :D

[Bluebear]

38. Same artist? >>>>

[aaronbees]

41. LOL...

That painting leaves me speechless ... just ... wow. But it does have the same strange and skewed perspective, to say the least.

[marions ghost]

44. that's actually not bad in the

folk art vein. (These days it could be an art sophisticate imitating folk art style). It has some art value.

Watcha gotta realize is there's "bad -bad art" and "good -bad art." The Geo Macaca family portrait has
no art value. But it is high kitsch. I'd buy it at the thrift shop in an instant.

[Irreverend IX]

30. I'd like to see one of these paintings done for Rick Santorum.

Do you he'd want the dead, miscarried fetus included? If it's a seaside scene, the fetus could have a festive little beach umbrella attached to its formaldehyde jar.

Anyway, I looked at the artist's website and can't understand how any self-respecting person could hang this cartoony shit in their house. It's flawed in lots of ways, but the worst thing is the disjointed composition--why are the family members crammed into the corners with a big empty space in the middle? Guitar boy doesn't look very good with his shoulder cut off like that, and what's the point of the cat and little table at the bottom? Not to mention the shoe with a bird perched on it.

Oh, and just so you know, prices for these things start at $4400.

[LibDemAlways]

79. This guy could make a fortune doing these

snarky "portraits" for prominent repukes. Cheney could be pictured pummeling a hapless guy with buckshot. Kindasleezy in dominatrix gear standing over a horizontal chimp. Chimp falling off the barstool....the possibilities are endless.

[Raine]

39. It looks like those things they

have had carnivals with the phony fronts where you stick you head thru them and get a picture of yourself in a goofy outfit with a goofy background. :silly:

[marions ghost]

43. LOL--gotta be where

the artist got the idea!

Sad what trained 'artists' will do to make a buck these days. A lot of them get caught up in prostitution. The only thing I sympathize with the artist about is that it's incredibly hard to make a living flailing away at old-fashioned paint and canvas.

However this art DOES reflect our cheap, one-size-fits-all cutesy kitschy consumer culture. In that sense it's sociologically interesting. If the artist were doing it deliberately this would rise to the level of Jeff Koons kitsch art. But no, he's "serious" about it, well, as serious as PT Barnum. There's money in tapping into rich narcissists.

[Red Right and BLUE]

40. Jeebus, those are HIDEOUS eom

[marions ghost]

42. thank you

for posting this. Best laugh I've had all day. Says it all about the narcissist fantasies of people like George Macaca. What this says about our culture is the true value of this kind of kitsch. I admit a fascination with how people like to be portrayed. I remember a childhood friend whose father's imposing (huge) portrait hung in their living room. He was portrayed as Mr. Upstanding Pillar of the Community. I had never seen such a bombastic formal portrait and was momentarily impressed. Meanwhile he was doing dirty deals at the bank where he worked, for which he later did jail time.

-----------------

I liked Wonkette's comments also:

"At left, the Man Who Won’t Be President prepares to throw a “long bomb,” if you will, at, uh… the creepy one-legged ukulele player maybe. Or that dead-eyed singer who looks remarkably like his dead-eyed wife (seated directly to the right of Allen, in Capri Hammer Pants). Wait, we just realized the singer is his older daughter. His younger daughter is the little Children of the Corn sprite at Wifey’s side. Seated at right, Allen’s son (the one named after this great American hero) receives a sort of combination regrettable senior picture plus county fair caricature treatment (so — you like “rock and roll,” Forrest? ‘Course you do!). And they’re all trapped in some sort of hellish, washed-out, post-apocalyptic On the Beach-meets-Margaritaville scenario. A different kind of family portrait indeed."

A couple of other comments on Wonkette:

Tally Ho says: Wait, so who are the creepy Hawaiian tourists hanging out with his daughter? And where'd the cat come from? Plus, this looks like no beach in Virginia I've ever been to. Add some bikers and a few titty bars and then it might be realistic.

Iranian Stallion says: Macaca's daughter is hot…I wonder how he'd feel if she dated an Iranian?

[LibDemAlways]

52. Thanks for posting wonkette's comments....

absolutely dead-on. And the reader comments are priceless.

I still can't believe he paid big money for this and hung it in his home. He's a US senator. Don't he and his wife ever entertain? You'd think someone would have told him to get a clue.

[WilliamPitt]

45. BUY IT

That piece of shit will be worth millions after the trial.

[LibDemAlways]

48. Maybe DUers should all get together and make him an

offer now. LOL

[LibDemAlways]

49. kick for the morning crowd.

[Bethany Rockafella]

50. I don't see any black folks in that picture. ;-)

[LibDemAlways]

51. There are no black people in Allen's entire

warped universe.

This so-called "portrait" is only a slight improvement over his previous home/office decor which included a large Confederate flag and a noose.

[dogday]

53. It's as false as they are

False life... Who wants that? Looks too good to be true, it usually is...

[Solly Mack]

54. Jack Chick meets Thomas Kinkade?? Sure looks it

[underpants]

55. !~*WHY is there a BIRD on a HIGH HEEL SHOE????*~!!

Wow talk about airing your fetish out in public.

What the hell is the deal with that?

[LibDemAlways]

58. Maybe it's a hummingbird and it's taking a

break from drinking the "sweet nectar of liberty." :shrug:

[underpants]

61. ...oh no you di-unt SWEET NECTAR OF LIBERTY!!!!

http://www.conservative.org/pressroom/2006/speech_allen.asp
Senator George Allen (R-VA)
Conservative Political Action Conference
Washington, DC
February 9, 2006

Ladies and gentlemen. Patriots all! Good evening!

Allen Philosophy
As many of you know, I grew up in a coach’s family. As such, I was raised on the four Fs of Life: Faith, Family, Freedom and Football!

But I say, remember Ronald Reagan who changed all the dynamics of the Cold War, which went on for nearly fifty years. Reagan didn’t think you could appease, co-exist, and accommodate the Soviet Union. He changed the dynamics in favor of the advancement of freedom. And now, because of Ronald Reagan—along with Margaret Thatcher and Pope John Paul the Second—there are millions of people in Central and Eastern Europe who were locked behind that Iron Curtain, who are now tasting that sweet nectar of liberty, and they are our friends and allies. He persevered, and freedom prevailed.

PRESIDENT RONALD REAGAN'S 95TH BIRTHDAY
http://thomas.loc.gov/cgi-bin/query/R?r109:FLD001:S50721
February 06, 2006
Today, because of Ronald Reagan, there are literally hundreds of millions of people who were once locked behind the Iron Curtain living in countries we now know as free countries--Lithuania, Latvia, Estonia, former East Germany, Poland, the Czech Republic, Slovakia, Hungary, Romania, Bulgaria, and added countries such as Ukraine and Georgia, which are now tasting that sweet nectar of liberty as opposed to being behind the Iron Curtain.




HONORING THE 94TH ANNIVERSARY OF PRESIDENT RONALD REAGAN'S BIRTH
http://www.washingtonwatchdog.org/environmental_justice/documents/cr/05/fe/03/cr03fe05-25.html
February 3, 2005

Today, thanks to Ronald Reagan, as I saw Ambassadors on
the House floor from Lithuania, from Romania, throughout Central
Europe--those were hundreds of millions of people who were behind the
Iron Curtain. But, thanks to Ronald Reagan's perseverance, for his
belief in the dignity of all human beings, that all people do yearn to
be free, to exercise their God-given rights, those people who were
behind that Iron Curtain, who were enemies, are now tasting that sweet
nectar of liberty.






Condi Rice’s confirmation hearing
1/19/05
http://allen.senate.gov/?c=story&t=press&story=2005011961776.859375


Because of President Reagan's steadfast determination, hundreds of millions of people tasting that sweet nectar of liberty in central Europe are now friends and allies," said Senator Allen.

On the 2004 election
10/10/2004
http://www.vote-smart.org/speech_detail.php?speech_id=69507
Ronald Reagan's election changed the dynamic of the Cold War from one of containment and co-existence to the advancement of freedom. As a result, hundreds of millions of people in Central Europe, once behind the Iron Curtain, now taste the sweet nectar of liberty, have joined NATO, and are true friends and allies.

Senator Allen's Tribute to President Reagan
June 8, 2004
http://www.nrsc.org/nrscweb/newsdesk/articles/401.shtml

But President Reagan believed the blessings of liberty must not be bestowed only on a few nations and only to those blessed to be born on free soil; Ronald Reagan, with the strength of his convictions, exported and advanced democracy to continents, countries, and people yearning to taste the sweet nectar of libert.



GOVERNOR ALLEN SELECTED AS "JEFFERSON SCHOLAR"
August 28, 1998
http://www.alec.org/viewpage.cfm?pgname=3.1aa56

He also pointed to North Korea, China, Iraq, Cuba and other countries where "there are people who have never truly tasted freedom's sweet nectar.

[LibDemAlways]

64. That was a nod to you, underpants....

"Sweet nectar of liberty," indeed. More like kool-aid for the idiots who support him.....

[underpants]

81. Speaking of google bombs

since that seems to be the topic of this afternoon around here.

google "SWEET NECTAR OF LIBERTY"

[LibDemAlways]

84. I love it. Any Allen admirer who googles the idiot's

favorite expression gets directed first right to your journal and DU. Inspired!!

[KayLaw]

63. That IS strange

But,IMO, no stranger than him holding a football in such a situation.

[Ino]

56. Reminds me of a Jehovah Witness prop

This looks like an illustration that a Jehovah Witness showed me saying that's what they're trying to achieve in this world.

[KayLaw]

60. Really?

Someone else said Rapture. With booze and surfers and a cat? Oh, well, it's pretty hard to know what to think.

[FlaGranny]

62. It does - except the JH pictures

usually have a couple of light-brown skinned people in them.

[Momgonepostal]

72. I was thinking exactly the same thing

The artist's style is VERY reminiscent of the illustrations in JW pamphlets!

[LeftyMom]

89. That's what it reminds me of too

The gauzy images of rolling hills covered in picnicing neuclear families on the cover of Watchtower.

[Jacobin]

57. Looks like its by the artist who does the Velvet Elvis 'paintings'

The man has taste so ghastly, he shouldn't be allowed near the WH

[LibDemAlways]

59. I'd love to see the "artist" tackle the

Bush family. Laura popping xanax. The twins on the tv in a Girls Gone Wild video and the chimp passed out under the bar while the poor dog Barney runs for its life.

[Rabbit of Caerbannog]

65. I looked through the "artist's" website and he does not include

a single person who ain't totally lilly white in ANY of his "portraits"

[LibDemAlways]

66. I think only the lowest, most moronic freeper type would

consider this "art" to begin with - which narrows his customer base to a few pathetic white guys who also think Jesus on velvet is cool.

[LibDemAlways]

67. One more "greatest page" nod and this

masterpiece will be seen by many more DUers in need of a good laugh on a Friday afternoon! Thanks.

[cboy4]

68. SUH-WEEEET JESUS

:puke:

[Maven]

69. PHONY. TACKY. CREEPY.

The Republican trifecta.

[corkhead]

71. it looks like one of those creepy pictures from "Watchtower"

that Jehovah's Witnesses sticks in my door when I'm not home...


...except for the football

[LibDemAlways]

86. The tombstones in that pic are chilling. Have to

assume the people in the background are dead and welcoming some new arrivals to someone's concept of heaven that looks a lot like an alpine meadow. Creepy. And what's with the little blonde girls running to say hi to daddy. And why the hell aren't there any elderly dead people? WTF?

[mindfulNJ]

74. ummm...I think it's brilliant.

I think the artist is a brilliant satirist...he's making fun of this buffoon, very subtley...Fox news on the telly? C'mon...this guy knew what he was doing. Too bad Mr.
Macaca didn't catch on.

[elehhhhna]

75. Buy the boy a normal sized guitar already, cheapskate.

[npincus]

77. where are the covered wagons?

[LibDemAlways]

80. It looks like the word "vinegar" appears on his

belt buckle as in "piss and vinegar" - meaning vitality. Maybe that helps to explain why this is a much younger George Allen. There's a bunch of strange stuff going on here. There has to be a hidden Confederate flag or noose in there someplace.

This has to be the weirdest "family portrait" I've ever seen.

[kpete]

82. Really, really, really, really

BAD ART!!!

[w4rma]

83. LOL! FOX News is on the TV at the bar. (nt)

[KoKo]

85. Thanks Much, LibDemAlways and posters on this thread!....

It's great to have a little :rofl: in these dark times.

I had no idea someone would pay for something like what this artist does, but I guess it's the new twist on those huge family portraits that some of my Southern friends like to fill their houses with that are about 4' by 5.'

I can see this going over in California, too...so not dissing my Southern family and friends here. It's just that having lived in New England for so long it was a shock to come back to the South and see the artwork be huge family portraits everywhere. I felt ashamed because I have Audobon bird prints in my house along with some watercolors picked up along the way at Art Fairs and flea markets. My family photo's are all small in comparison scattered around here and there....


The Macca Family Portrait is one of the funnies things I've ever seen and I'm glad to be enlightened as to what's going on out there with this kind of new family portrait for the ego-centric. :D

[StraightDope]

87. So what?

Aside from Katherine Harris on the right with the flower in her hair, I don't see anything unusual.

[BoneDaddy]

88. Who the hell cares

I can't believe this is coming under scrutiny.

[Taverner]

90. I think what scares me more is his son is named after Nathan B Forrest

The originator of the KKK

[LibDemAlways]

92. The daughters, Brooke and Tyler, are named for

prominent Confederates, too. Robert Tyler, last Confederate general slain in battle. John M. Brooke, resigned his commission in the U.S. Navy and went South. Became Commander of Confederate States Navy.

Allen loves slipping stuff like this under the radar. He's a piece of work.

[Taverner]

93. It would be like naming your kids Hermann, Adolf and Martin

After the prominent National Socialists...

[JitterbugPerfume]

94. that is

cheap and chintzy , just like its owner

[angstlessk]

95. Where is the dead fetus, he left out the dead fetus...how very cruel!

When I clicked on I was sure the dead fetus would be included in the 'family portrait'..they can play with it but not have it pictured in the 'family portrait'? Maybe he/she came back as a cat?

[HiFructosePronSyrup]

96. Hey, George Allen isn't that bad of a guy.

Looks to me like he's always up for a game of catch. And his son's a rock star too. pretty cool if you ask me.

[KoKo]

97. kick....

[McCamy Taylor]

99. Looks trashy to me. Is it painted on velvet?