Question for women. At 14, could you be attracted to a 23 year old man?

[trumad]

and if so--- could you be seduced by him?

[Fierce]

1. Why?

nt

[trumad]

2. Because most 14 year old boys would jump at the chance.

I'm just wondering if girls are the same?

[Fierce]

14. Doesn't matter what the 14-year-old wants, male or female.

If there's a law against it, there's a law against it. And the 23-year-old, male or female, would do well to remember that.

[banjoterror]

23. OBEY!!! n/t

[heidler1]

41. The Sex drive in all animals over powers good judgment.

We surelly know this because it keeps happening over and over. The best we can do is have the law in hope that it will limit the problem.

[Lindacooks]

46. Oh please, that's ridiculous.

We're helpless before our sex drives, is that it? Gosh, I guess that puts us on par with monkeys or pigs, huh?

Wrong. Adults know how to behave, and seducing a child is NOT the way to behave. And the fact that she is a teacher makes it 100 times worse. She was TRAINED on how to handle children, and KNOWS that anything beyond encouraging him in school is 1000% wrong.

[heidler1]

86. Hey this keeps happening with humans so face it. If this was not true

We would of most likely have became extinct before we evolved into humans. Just because we can go to school and learn things does not negate our animal instincts. You must admit if it didn't happen we wouldn't be talking about it. Surely you have read about the Mormons and Warren Jeffs who have been practicing polygamy and the slavery that goes with it. Also where men pay big bucks to have a 13 or 14 year old girl and they get caught in police traps. I'm not saying it's right, but I am saying it's common even in the U.S. It's even more common in some other countries.

[Lindacooks]

144. Yeah, it keeps happening. With STUPID humans.

And those people aren't even trying to act like human beings. That excuse of 'we're animals, it'a an instinct' is SO 15th century.

[Jack Rabbit]

200. Really? Shall we ask Mr. Clinton about that?

[etherealtruth]

48. I'm sure there are a large number of 14 year olds "infatuated"

... with adults.

They still have the judgment of a 14 year old, the life experience of a 14 year old ... which is significantly different than that of an adult.

[Truthiness Inspector]

74. Good response

and I agree. I'd say the vast majority of 14 year olds have crushes on adults (teachers, coaches, celebrities, etc). It's up to adults to act like adults.

[OPERATIONMINDCRIME]

106. And The 14 Yr Old Male Would Do Well To

figure out a way to bang her anyway. At 14 I had a 19 yr old. Sure, not 23, but still. I made sure I used whatever charm I could possibly muster to make sure I got me some LOL But then, that's 14 for ya.

[Fierce]

107. Haw haw haw!

"got me some LOL", indeed.

[JerseygirlCT]

132. Exactly. It's about the responsibility for behaving responsibly

residing with the legal adult.

What the child thinks he or she wants is immaterial here. A sexual relationship with an adult is illegal, and the adult is behaving in a criminal fashion by indulging in it.

[lumberjack_jeff]

57. It's a good question.

Suspecting that inherent gender differences suggested a different legal standard, sparkly polled DU'er men and found that 90% felt that at age 14 they could have engaged in sex with a teacher like LaFave without lasting harm.

It'd be interesting to know if women feel that they could have done the same thing. Further, it'd be interesting to understand the reason for the differences.

<flame suit on>
I suspect that part of the reason for the advocacy of unequal treatment lies in a cultural expectation that males (both grownup and adolescent) are not supposed to be victims, and are expected to have a greater degree of personal responsibility: "Teachers should not screw students... except I can see the gray area when it's a hot 23 year-old female and a 14 year old boy." and "Children are harmed by engaging in exploitative sex in which a massive power disparity exists, except maybe adolescent boys - we all know how horny they are."

In both cases, the boys are expected to be responsible for their sexuality, and female teachers given some comparative slack because the boys are not helpless victims.

The fact that men are more likely to excuse the LaFave case suggests to me that this is an artifact of a patriarchal system, and I'm surprised at how little support the idea of a gender-blind justice system has here.

This viewpoint is supported by the comparatively hard-line responses in this thread. "A girl might have a crush on an older guy, but if the guy acts on it, it's a crime. Period." The latter is a viewpoint that I find meritorious, for both genders.
</flame suit>

[Odin2005]

129. I totally agree.

IMO it's based on this BS that women are supossed to be "pure" virgins before marrige and men are not. the double standard (calling for lynchings if the adult is a man and people saying how lucky the guy is if the adult is a woman) is based on this notion of the young woman's "purity," it's sexist crap masquerading as an argument about "protecting" teens.

[CatWoman]

3. why not?

:shrug:

some of us "mature" faster than others.....

[trumad]

7. Good answer

[Warpy]

67. Nah, 23 was an old man when I was 14

16 was a completely different matter.

Guys who were significantly older than I was didn't just turn me off. If they made passes, I got a little queasy.

As for 14 year old boys jumping at the chance, I sincerely doubt they're in the majority, although given the lack of physical consequences, I'm sure many can be persuaded.

The 14 year old boys I knew in school were mostly pretty backward.

[demnan]

4. Oh yes

At 14 I had a crush on my English teacher. He was probably 40. I would have done anything he asked me to. Fortunately the only thing he ever asked me to do was to clean the blackboards!

[devilgrrl]

5. You could be attracted but sorry, that's kinda creepy...

I suppose it would depend on the individual, as I knew a girl when I was a kid who screwed around with guys that age. Then again, what's that say about the guy? Either way, it's fucked up.

[Kire]

16. That's what I thought: creepy.

Why does trumad need to know about all this anyway? And why is this in GD?

[trumad]

20. Because I'm tying it in with the Debra LaFave thread.

I think I'm pointing out that it aint just us guys at a young age who clamour for the older woman.

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_mesg&forum=364&topic_id=2147869&mesg_id=2147869

[devilgrrl]

29. Young girls may clamor for guys in their 20's-they'd be labelled as Sluts

plain and simple.

[HiFructosePronSyrup]

35. Sure.

But girls clamoring for boys their own age would be labelled the same. Not sure what your point is.

[devilgrrl]

52. I guess my point is...

that guys "can - girls "can't"... if you know what I mean. I'm not saying I'm right but that's the way it usually is.

[ShortnFiery]

77. We can NOT morally evaluate children being attracted to other teens

However, what we do as parents, is encourage our teens to "respect their bodies" and not give themselves (including BOYS) to anyone who they don't TRUST and CARE DEEPLY about. It doesn't always work, but HELL NO!

Parents want adults grubby hands off of their young teens. More than a few of us School Age Parents consider "the thought" demented and disgusting. When teens turn 18 and wish to go out to Prom with a College Person, then there's some complexity where dating would be understandable. However, until then, Adults please don't show up at our house for a date because I - or - Mr. ShortnFiery (Retired Marine) will kick your a** into the next state. No lie. :grr:

This is not an amusing topic as Adults are supposed to know not to have SEX with Minors. There's plenty of fish in the sea so go elsewhere, IMO "pervert." :(

[Odin2005]

130. So I guessing you think Romeo was a monster, then...

I was told that he was in his 20's and Juliet was 14.

[ShortnFiery]

163. In America today, such a Sit would not be the same, and yes

if they were intimate in a Sexual Way, he would be considered a Sex Offender in Today's America.

We are, as mature Adults, obligated to protect our children from demented Adults in today's society. An Adult knows that it is IMMORAL and ILLEGAL to have sex with a child and or teen under the age of 18, and if discovered, they will be charged and convicted.

[raccoon]

171. Your source for Romeo's age?

What I've read is his age is estimated at 17.

[Odin2005]

180. My English teacher from high school.

[Ariana Celeste]

40. Not when I was in high school.

"Sluts" were just the girls who slept around with a ton of guys, regardless of age. "Sluts" were the girls who stole other girls' boyfriends, or simply just fucked other girls' boyfriends. Age had nothing to do with it. :shrug:

[devilgrrl]

51. Interesting, because most of the "sluts" I knew never slept with anyone...

but were tagged as "sluts" by vindictive classmates.

[ShortnFiery]

78. It's still that way ... you can be popular but also date other teens

I never was attracted to older men like some of my friends in H.S. were.

I don't get it at all. My parents would have "gone nuts" at the mere thought that I would ACT ON such a fantasy.

You can look all you want and sin in your heart. We all do. But don't sexually abuse our children. :(

[EFerrari]

44. Or, they'd be labeled as young women who get bored with

their peers because of developmental differences.

Sluts, not so much.

[ShortnFiery]

73. That doesn't make it less DEMENTED to the vast majority of parents!

The 23 year old, albeit the attraction is mutual is "on task" to be THE ADULT and not Sexually Abuse a Minor.

Sorry, this is still the US of A, not Saudi Arabia ---> having SEX with a Minor is Criminal. Why? Because when An Adult has sex with A Minor, the vast majority of Morally Sound Americans (most especially parents of young children and teens) will NOT want you to be *anywhere near* their children.

Did you know that "having sex with minors" is often an obsession like Pedophilia? Did you also know that the vast majority of Police and Communities within the USA will prosecute you?

Do you still think the the attraction is OK to act on if you consider The Minor to be "Mature"? BTW that's a come-on ("Oh you are so much more mature than any teen I've ever met!") many Sexual Predators use to HOOK the Victim. :eyes:

[Odin2005]

131. I think calling teens children is insulting towards teens.

In most societies you are an adult when you are 14.

[Kire]

138. Did you get your answer?

Anyone with common sense would know the answer to that question. It looks like you were just trying to stir things up by asking it.

[BlooInBloo]

204. Oh let them live in their sexual attraction-free bubble.

[Greyhound]

58. Societal bias is ubiquitous, as is our double standard.

Biology dictates our sexuality while society tries to suppress it, resulting in all manner of perversions.

[ShortnFiery]

80. But make no doubt, the EMOTIONAL TRAUMA of an Adult

Sexually Abusing a Minor is very real and does not always surface immediately following the sex acts.

There's a lot of emotional feelings that surround being Sexually Active. Adults should respect children enough to decline any temptations even if "the minor" wants it. Why? It's criminal. ;)

[Greyhound]

98. But the trauma is not a result of the act, it is a result of the reaction

to the act. If we didn't spend such an inordinate amount of time obsessing about what is completely natural and attempting to prohibit it, there is no trauma.

It is similar to the negative effects of drug use, almost all of the harm done is due to the illegality of the drugs not the drugs themselves.

[ShortnFiery]

123. Oh stop, when an adult has SEX with a young teen child it is NOT

Natural but coercive Criminal Misconduct. :grr: And "the reaction" is all the emotions that a young teen will feel that he or she does not understand. Sometimes it's tragic between teens, but DAMN the Adult who Preys on these Children. Lock um up! :(

[Greyhound]

152. Please re-read reply #58.

You are coming from the societal position, I from the biological. Adolescence is a modern construct and only exists because we decided it did, usually because of some religious dictate. I'm not advocating anything, I am merely stating that the problem exists as a result of cultural attempts to trump biological fact.

[ShortnFiery]

160. Please read the Statutory RAPE laws.

Morality and The Rule of Law trumps your libidinal biologically urges love fest. :(

But feel free to promote that it's allegedly "Oh so natural" for adults to have SEX with children argument. After all it's a free country. However, if anyone adult HERE acts on their *natural urges* they can depend on to be arrested, charged, convicted and look forward to be on The Sexual Predator rolls and websites for the rest of their life. :wow: God Bless America! ;)

[Greyhound]

175. I guess there's no interest in an actual discussion

Have a great day.:hi:

[madmunchie]

137. I went to a HS where a teacher married 2 of his students

after they graduated and after he was divorced from the first one. He remained a teacher for a LONG time. No uproar.

Now tell me how this is so uncommon and how women get away with it so much more and men don't.

The principal in my HS was having an affair with his secretary, (who dressed like Elizabeth Taylor, hair and all). This crap has been going on FOREVER, now there is just more "hysteria" about it.

There are "Predators" and there are kids trying to grow up to fast and young adults that haven't grown up yet, they are not the same. Mixing them together doesn't address either of the problems in the right way.

[wicket]

6. Yes

n/t

[Adelante]

8. Is this a trick question?

The 23-year old has the obligation to not take advantage of the situation, but a 14-year old could easily be seduced, girl or boy.

[Kire]

141. Yes it is

And a dumb one

[hippiechick]

9. Oh hell yes.

And when I was 15 and lost my virginity to a 27 year old ... well, I don't need to expound. :(

[HiFructosePronSyrup]

10. I was going to post this in the other thread...

but it got too big.

I'm male, and I would have jumped at the chance to hump my English teacher. I certainly spent enough of my adolescence masturbating about that particular fantasy. And if somebody at the time had told me that was "rape," I'd have told them to fuck off.

But then, there's this double standard about girls and older men. And sexist double standards are bad.

Which leads us to the eight-hundred pound gorilla in the middle of the room which no one, including me, wants to talk about.

[southernleftylady]

11. yes but the 23 year old man must stay away . nt

[pooja]

12. Its a fantasy that doesn't need playing out.

[supernova]

13. Yes, of course

When you are young, people who are about 10 years older than you are very appealing, because they are where you will be.

[Lilith Velkor]

15. hoo boy

:popcorn:

[Ariana Celeste]

17. Absolutely.

Almost all of the guys I dated were older then me. I matured way too quickly as a result of my childhood.

[CatWoman]

18. LOL

Well, Tru, if I were 14, 23, 33, 55, 65 -- I'd still love you :)

[Schema Thing]

19. I'm 43, and a 14 yo recently made it clear she was attracted to me

my advice, pretend cluelessness, and let it pass as if you don't even see it. She should not be made to feel bad or "not normal" because of it, and most anyone in her life you might talk about it with, would undoubtably blow it out of proportion. At the same time, it's not something you can talk with her about safely either; hence the "clueless" recomendation.

[ShortnFiery]

89. That's a very mature and thoughtful reaction.

Kudos to you for being The Considerate Adult. :applause:

[pnwmom]

178. I think that was a brilliant response.

Considerate and safe. Bravo!

[butterfly77]

21. I could be attracted to one....

and have but I wouldn't I had crushes on a few when I was that age and a some were older than 23. I don't think that I could have been seduced.

[DRoseDARs]

22. Don't see what difference my gender makes in giving an answer...

...but this sort of thing happens ALL THE TIME. Unless you're living under a rock, it's quite common for teen girls to fall in love with older men and visa versa. It's when something physically happens between them that problems arise. Depending on the state/country, the couple might run afoul of age-of-consent laws. THe older partner could face fines or jail time. A 14 yr-old and a 23 yr-old is a pretty iffy scenario. I'd err on the side of caution and say no to this arrangement. She needs to wait until she's older and he needs to stay away from any intimate contact with her. There's nothing wrong with friendship for these two until she's had a chance to emotionally mature.

[meganmonkey]

24. Yes and no

Yes to attracted, no to seduced.

I had a situation similar to that, except I was 15 and he was 22. We went out twice, and he started calling every day and told me he loved me. Maybe that had helped him get in a girl's pants before, but in my case it just creeped me out. Why would a 22 year old man be 'in love with' a 15 year old kid he barely knew?

[DemReadingDU]

143. see my answer #142

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_mesg&forum=364&topic_id=2163616&mesg_id=2166727

[helderheid]

25. when I was 13, I was attracted to a 36 year old man and seduced by him

He stalked me for years. After some time I realized that he was a pedophile and I'd been molested, and that he had manipulated me. Many pedophiles "seduce" their victims. That's part of the abuse that is so vile - because you feel like it was your fault.

[Lindacooks]

47. Oh, I'm sorry that happened to you.

I hope you're okay now.

[helderheid]

124. I am, thanks!

:hug:

[MamaBear]

26. Could I, Would I, or Was I?

Could I be attracted to a guy 9 years older than me? Did 14-year-old girls go bonkers for the Beatles in 1964, who at the time were about 22-23? So COULD there be an attraction? Okay. Next.

Would I be likely to actually act out on that impulse? Hard to say.

Was I attracted like that? I had a flirtation with a guy who was about 22; I got totally creeped out after one double (thankfully) date, and ended the "relationship."

Most adults would agree, I think, that many teenagers aren't fully capable of making reasonable decisions about matters sexual, especially where older partners are involved. That must be why it's illegal for adults to enter into those relationships. There are many perks to being grownup but many responsibilities as well.

[smalll]

68. Seems that 14 year-old girls can be attracted to 73 year-old men even -

as evidenced by that annoying Kathy and Mike Malloy graphic. :hide:
(Someone tell me that's his daughter or grand-daughter and you will have my deepest apologies.)

[sandnsea]

27. Totally irrelevant question

The very reason we have consent laws is because we don't expect young people to fully appreciate the consequences of sexual decisions - in part because they don't have the experience of being repeatedly lied to for sexual purposes. That's why we make the ADULT responsible for staying away from juveniles, regardless of gender.

[etherealtruth]

84. Best answer I've read!

[helderheid]

120. DING DING DING DING!!!

[ShortnFiery]

125. Yes, very well put

:applause:

[CJCRANE]

28. a) Get thee into the lounge

b) That's illegal

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

30. At 14, I was attracted to 23 year old women.

And I definitely could have been seduced by one, if the opportunity arose. I don't think it would have harmed me in any way.

I'm a lesbian, FWIW.

[omega minimo]

31. Another Lounge thread...................

:puke:

[CatWoman]

34. Back off!!!

so, the lounge is the only place Lafave can be discussed?

Don't you mess with Tru!!!

[omega minimo]

43. Oh I'm sorry-- was there a point to the 2 sentence OP?

:wow:

[Ariana Celeste]

53. There's a lot of crap in GD, dude

Why waste your time? Just read and respond to the ones you like. It takes just a second to back out of a thread. It takes several to post a reply.

[Ariana Celeste]

38. So, hide the thread

:wtf:

[omega minimo]

42. Hide it in the Lounge

:hi:

[CatWoman]

49. better yet

why don't YOU go hide in the Lounge?

[omega minimo]

54. So what about that point?

:shrug:

[HiFructosePronSyrup]

56. I have a question.

Did you make such a fuss in the thread that asked the same thing of men?

[omega minimo]

62. Was it equal opportunity lack of context?

[HiFructosePronSyrup]

64. You dodged the question.

Is it because the question makes you uncomfortable?

I mean the OP's question.

[omega minimo]

83. No I made a joke

Why do you assume I saw the other thread?


... like the OP assumes everyone knows what he means.............

:yoiks:

[CatWoman]

66. wasn't sure you had one

:shrug:

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

96. Hey, don't pawn his irrational anger on the Lounge.

He can hide in the dungeon.

[omega minimo]

103. "Irrational anger" ? Well it ain't "anger" and the OP is "irrational"

but that's okay, huh! It's meant for the folks who already know......... whatever................

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

104. I just think it's pretty crazy how you believe yourself to be the

grand arbiter of what threads deserve to be in GD and what threads deserve to be in the lounge. If you don't like it, then hide it or alert on it and say you think the thread should be in the lounge. There's no point to snarkily declaring the thread unworthy of your GD ideal.

[omega minimo]

105. I have a new ideal

One title
One sentence
No context
GREATEST!!!!!!!! :woohoo:

[OPERATIONMINDCRIME]

110. Wait, It's She Right?

I couldn't possibly have wrongly assumed gender for the past year could I have? LOL

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

111. I honestly don't know.

I didn't check out their profile.

I know I'm a she though and you're a he.

[OPERATIONMINDCRIME]

114. Whew. Ok.

I thought I've been TOTALLY using the wrong word when describing the poster to my wife LOL ;)

There was a time a few months back where I found out that a poster I would've SWORN was a female was actually male, so I thought I may have totally gotten it wrong again.

[omega minimo]

115. You haven't told your wife your obsession is male?

:wow:

[OPERATIONMINDCRIME]

116. Ha! Don't Flatter Yourself. And Responses Like That Belong In The Lounge.

:rofl:

[EFerrari]

32. When I was 16, my boyfriend was 25. I was a mature 16,

he was a youngish 25. And, a great guy. A Viet Nam vet putting his life back together.

Hmm. :)

[CatWoman]

36. you know, I didn't start dating younger men

or men in my own age range until my 40's.

[EFerrari]

39. Same here. And I'm still not sure it was a good idea.

:evilgrin:

[LisaM]

59. The differences between 14 and 16 are way different

than those between 23 and 25.

[EFerrari]

65. Very true. 14, 15, 16, different universes. n/t

[ShortnFiery]

88. Not to most parents. n/t

[EFerrari]

95. Most parents can be very tone deaf around their kids sexuality.

I'm not at all advocating for underage sex. It's just that, most parents seem to have a lag time between the time their kids are active and the time they actually deal with that effectively.

/typo

[ShortnFiery]

122. Most Parents will call the Police to have An Adult hanging

out with their young teen children encouraged to not be around YOUR CHILD any more. IMO protecting my children from Adult predators is truly ONLY because I love them and do not want them to be "sexually abused."

An Adult has SEX with an minor, is a criminal. :( The adults are criminals who have stolen the innocence away from someone's beloved child. NO SLACK!

[EFerrari]

127. You bet! And the other side of the equation, helping kids

understand and cope with their screaming hormones, is important to their wellbeing.

[ShortnFiery]

161. Yes - Exactly! Adolescence is a very emotional time aside from the

new hormonal challenges. Issues relating to one's identity formation and peer group membership are, in themselves, an emotional roller coaster ride. Yes, it's important to do our best (it's been awhile for me) to try and empathize with the trials our your teen throughout Junior and High School - well, and beyond if you love them. :-)

[ShortnFiery]

82. And your parents were "cool" with this relationship?

I would absolutely have literally kicked his ass, Combat Vet or not. He would cease seeing you at the age of 16. :grr:

Guess you're relieved that your Mom was not like me? :-)

[EFerrari]

100. You know, my mom was an addict and I had been taking care of her

for years at that point. She's "cool" today and has been for 30 years, so no dissing someone that pulled themselves back from the last edge. :)

I basically didn't have a parent after the age of 11. And, looking back, I'm very lucky that my boyfriend was a very decent human being and that he encourged me to stay in school and so on. Dumb luck.

[patcox2]

33. Question: at 23, could you be attracted to a 45 year old man?

You know, when you are 23 the age difference between 23 and 17 or 23 and 14 might seem huge. But from where I sit, its not so much.

There are people of the same age who, simply by reason of intelligence, maturity, experience, and lack of these same features, are in a position that the difference between them, and the opportunity for overreaching, are clearly as great or greater than is present between a 23 year old and a 14 year old, or a 30 year old and a 17 year old.

Arbitrary damnation, arbitrary shock, is shocking to me.

[MamaBear]

55. Actually, one of my best friends in high school married

a man 29 years older than she was at the time. She was nineteen, and he was forty-eight.

Not for everybody, I suppose, but they were happy enough. None of the grown-ups were happy about it, one of my friends was forbidden to attend her wedding, which was held in a tiny church out in the country, because none of the ministers in town would perform the service.

They were together until he passed away about 25 years later. That's longer than most of the more "age appropriate" marriages I've known about.

Edited to correct the math!

[EFerrari]

102. A marriage is what two people agree to. Hopefully, neither of them

is a child.

Women seem to mature faster, imho, but maybe one of our DUer biologists can set this aspect of this issue straight.

[Sequoia]

37. Yes and hopefully not.

23 year old had better know better. But wait....Elivs and Priscilla right?

[notadmblnd]

45. oh yeah,

easily, especially if the 14 yr old is from a home where the father has been absent.

[QuestionAll...]

50. yes, but depends on what you mean by 'attracted'.

at 14 I had lots of crushes on older young men, and was attracted to them.
But no way was I thinking bumping uglies - it was innocent crushlike.

could I have been seduced into having sex?
I didn't have any experience like that at that age so it's hard to say. Probably yes tho, and would have been scared to death and feel very betrayed.

[kerry-is-my-prez]

60. I was seeing a 21 yr old guy a that age - but was leery of the whole thing

If he would have done much more than kiss me - I would have likely have run for the hills. I also dated a 30 year old at the age of 19 but dumped him when I found out he had neglected to tell me right up front that he had 2 kids and one was about 10. THAT just totally creeped me out.

In the last several years I have only dated guys my age or usually a lot younger - go figure. I have no interest in any guys more than about 2 years older than me.

[Crunchy Frog]

61. I had crushes on actors and singing stars older than that.

I don't know if I could have been seduced by one, I was rather shy at the time, but I never got the opportunity to find out.:shrug:

[pnwmom]

179. I had crushes on actors who were so old

they were probably dead.

Hah! Age is no barrier to a good teenage crush.

[SoyCat]

63. My niece had a relationship with a man who was 10 yrs. her senior when

she was 14. At 16, she had his child. Her life has been horrible. So, yes, it happens all too often.

[LibDemAlways]

69. Of course. Just ask any 14 year old girl who

is infatuated with a rock star.

My 13-year-old has about 50 pictures of her favorite guitarist on her wall. He's 20.

Of course its strictly a one-way street, as are the vast majority of schoolgirl crushes. But given the opportunity, of course girls could be seduced by an older guy. Is it right? Emphatically, no.

[ShortnFiery]

70. It doesn't matter if I could be or not, if Mr. 23 y.o. has sex with me

he is a criminal and a sexual predator. :-)

[qwertyMike]

71. Sick

Of course at 14 hormones are raging.
If she could be seduced by him, he should be shot.

Bill of Rights, Charter of rights go out the window for me with minors.

[Lydia Leftcoast]

72. In my experience, 14-year-old girls can get crushes on

older men.

However, that doesn't mean they're emotionally ready for sex or even find the idea very appealing. Sometimes the crush on the usually unattainable older man is a way of avoiding "scary" encounters with boys their own age.

I had crushes on teachers when I was that age, but if one of them had actually put the moves on me, I would have freaked.

[pansypoo53219]

75. weeeeell, actually

my 1st crush was not leif garrett(who?) or shawn cassidy, it was the proffesor on gilligan's island. i hated that stupid show, and i liked him better in the color vrsion(older), soooo, actually 24 is tooooo young.
and i LOVE grey hair.
now i am old enough for this to be acceptable.

[trumad]

85. ROTFLMAO

I think thats one of the funniest posts I've ever read. The Professor...too funny.

[Dervill Crow]

149. Good gods, I had the hots for him, too. nt

[Lilith Velkor]

172. He was hot.

I had a thing for him when I was ~12.

[omega minimo]

76. .

[Bunny]

79. When I was 14, I had a mad crush on Richie Hebner.

He was about 24 or 25 at the time. I could not have been seduced by him, I was too much of a good Catholic girl. But if he had asked me to field a few grounders with him, :loveya:

[Lorien]

81. Yes. n/t

[sweetheart]

87. Dogs will tie with a bitch in heat

The bitch emits a very strong odour. Some people have not been around dogs so much,
and haven't seen the charming lust of a male dog around a bitch emitting the smell of her time.
The dog loses all sense of himself except for his reproduction function, its quite humourous.
And not so far beyond animals evolved are we, methinks, and most people will tie when the
smell hits them, not asking about identity cards or passports... just the smell.

[SoCalDem]

90. A 14 year old girl who has been exposed to 12 years of

bouncy sexpots bumping and grinding on TV?
a 14 yr old who buys shampoos, based on its "sexyness"?
a 14 yr old who has been dieting to appear sexy?
a 14 yr old who has been wearing spandex and make up since she was 10?
a 14 year old who may have gotten her first period at 9 or 10, and who LOOKS like a mature woman?

Heck yes!

14 year old girls (most of them) like nothing more than to APPEAR to be grown up.

and there are many 24 year old guys who are "stuck in their teens"..chalk it up to being treated like a kid by their parents, or perhaps a lack of opportunity to "grow up" (housing costs mean that lots of 20-somethings are still in their "kid-room" at Mom & Dad's place..

I know this is about the teacher, but I am speaking in generalities..

[Avalux]

91. 14 is so impressionable; emotionally immature

Yeah, the crush could have been there, and if the 23 year old man was bent enough to go about seducing me, probably could have happened. What's wrong with him anyway that he'd do such a thing?

[demgurl]

92. Yes.

At least at 15 or 16 I was. I remember being very attracted to my Catholic School Religion teacher. I think he was just as attracted to me since he once told some of the other students to get back to their desk and do their work while he and I sat there discussing world religions. He always gave me special attention and offered me books when I said I was interested in finding out about Buddhism.

As I grew older I was always still attracted to older men. When I was 18 I dated a 35 year old for a year and a half or so. When I was 22 I dated a 45 year old for about three or four years.

If you want the pure truth, I am not sure if I was attracted to that age of a man at 14 but I know I was at 16. When I was in grade nine (about 14) I know I was dating a high school kid who was about 16 or 17. But he was always a gentleman and never once did he try to do anything beyond a kiss. At that age I was never seduced by a 23 year old or older man.

[treestar]

93. Yes, but I'd have been too scared to be seduced by him

which may be average for a 14 year old, though I'm sure there were those who'd have not had a problem.

Though there is hindsight in this, but I'm pretty sure my particular 14 year old self would not have run to parents or police and might have been flattered but would have likewise been to scared to uh, actually participate.

[Sapere aude]

94. I suppose no one here is old enough to remember the screaming that

went on at a Beatles concert or a Rolling Stones concert? I do and I remember not even hearing the band because of the noise made by the teeny boppers.

[H2O Man]

97. This all started

when rock-n-roll brought its moral decay to our cultural. Yes, it's true: when The Union Gap, featuring Gary Puckett, sang, "Young Girl," innocent victims like CatWoman took down her General Haig posters, and began to dance the mercy beat with wild abdomen.

Young girl, get out of my mind
My love for you is way out of line
Better run, girl,
You're much too young, girl
With all the charms of a woman
You've kept the secret of your youth
You led me to believe
You're old enough
To give me Love
And now it hurts to know the truth, Oh,
Beneath your perfume and make-up
You're just a baby in disguise
And though you know
That it is wrong to be
Alone with me
That come on look is in your eyes, Oh,
So hurry home to your mama
I'm sure she wonders where you are
Get out of here
Before I have the time
To change my mind
'Cause I'm afraid we'll go too far, Oh,
Young

[omega minimo]

101. "Rap rap rap They call him The Rapper"

"Rap Rap Yeah You know What he's after"

[ms liberty]

109. Gawd, I hadn't thought about that song in years!

But I would say it was Elvis who started it. Those lips, those eyes, those hips swiveling so suggestively!

MY first love was Paul McCartney, though. It was only after I got older - you know, eight or nine at least - that I got over Paul and fell for John instead.

[OPERATIONMINDCRIME]

113. Great Song. Haven't Heard It In A While, But Now It's In My Head.

You also got 'Don't Stand So Close To Me' by the Police too.

[Imagevision]

146. And when Elvis came along... umm...

[Sydnie]

99. Hey, love knows no age

My father was 40 and my mother was 17 when they got married. They had five kids together. They were married for 23 years before he passed away prematurely.

I remember her telling me the story of her wedding night after I had been married for sometime myself. She was still in her senior year of high school when they married and were married on New Years Eve. My father very gently told her that she should not go back to school and tell what they were going to do together that night. He said it was not anyone's business what two married people did and that it would be unacceptable for her to share any details with her friends, especially those that had not been married yet. That, of course, was in the late 40's.

My father was teased for years about being a "cradle robber" but it didn't phase either of my parents because they loved each other. They built a good life together too.

Several years after my father passed, my mother remarried. She married someone who was merely a few years older than my oldest brother. They, too, were married for close to 23 years before she passed away.

Age has never been a big concern for me. Quality of the people involved always has been.

[lonestarnot]

108. Age is irrelevant when it comes to matters of the heart.

But if he's in trouble if she gets "seduced." We all know that is illegal.

[Cleita]

112. All the time and yes I could have bee seduced by them,

however, none had any interest in me.

[Horse with no Name]

117. Absolutely.

Which is why we need to make sure that ONLY emotionally stable people are entrusted to teach our children.
It is perfectly normal for kids this age--raging hormones and all--to develop crushes on authority figures, athletes, movie stars, etc.

[ms liberty]

118. Yes and no

Not only was I attracted to men 23 and older when I was 14, but I actually "dated" a couple of guys who were about 20, 21. At 14, dating was couples skating at the roller skating rink, and riding in their car to the pizza parlor where we were with 10 or 20 other friends, then all of us piling into the car and going to my house to play cards or monopoly. Of course my mother was there, and knew all of the crowd; we'd stay up all night, and the next morning my mom would make a huge breakfast for everyone.

But I NEVER slept with any of them, never went beyond kissing at age 14, and it was my decision. Hey, I was a product of enlightened public education - complete sex ed in the 6th grade, after signed parental permission. I was a virgin til I was 18, and picked the time, person, and place to lose that virginity on my own terms.

My husband tells me that when he was 14 he and all his friends were hot for one of their teachers; he says if that LeFavre chick had been his teacher and tried to seduce him, he'd have been all over that action. He's sure it wouldn't have scarred him for life!

[Nikia]

119. Of course

I was attracted to some male teachers and coaches at my school who were in their twenties. I probably could have been easily seduced by them because I had low self esteem, especially about my body and whether and desirable guys would like me, so I probably would have done anything for them. I think that I would have been rather upset in the end.

[Raine]

121. Well ya

when I was 14 or 15 I had a BIG crush :loveya: :blush: on my English teacher and he was probably in his mid 30's. :o Could I have been seduced (??) I don't know...possibly. Luckily I doubt that he even knew and if he did he had the decency to ignore me. :-)

[Name removed]

126. Deleted message

Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.

[Odin2005]

128. 14 & 23? Sounds like Juliet and Romeo...

:yoiks:

[Bucky]

134. I thought Romeo was supposed to be a teenager too, like 16

[Odin2005]

135. I was told he was in his 20s

[Crunchy Frog]

192. According to SparkNotes, he's about 16.

http://www.sparknotes.com/shakespeare/romeojuliet/characters.html

I don't know how authoritative that is.

[QuestionAll...]

133. any adult in authority over a child

and abuses that trust is dirt in my eyes.
I don't give a shit wether it's a male/ female child or what they daydream about or how 'mature' they are compared to others.

it's predatory by a so called adult.

[BlackVelvet04]

136. Attraction has little to do with age.....

and 14 year olds are as capable of seducing as being seduced. However, having sex with someone underage is never ok.

[QuestionAll...]

139. conquest

may be the nut of it all.
men/boys are more attuned in their own ways as written history tell us.

the 14 year old boy thinks he has conquested (because its socially ingrained, your penis is You). but the preditory woman has, actually in a case of child rape. This makes for many oddities. So the men/boys say, I'm not used and abused, my penis talks for me.

[OzarkDem]

140. Yes and no

At age 14, a 9 year age difference is too great.

Could a young person age 14 become infatuated with someone 9 yrs older, sure. Hey at that age I was madly in love with Jim Morrison of the Doors. But if he had tried to seduce me at that age I would have been frightened.

Romantic maturity is very different at that age.

[DemReadingDU]

142. Why is the girl always 14??????

Why not 15? or 13? or 16?

The girl is always 14 during those Dateline stings. Think about it.

My spouse says it's because that's the age when most guys get attracted to girls. They become 'fixated' at 14, and there they are, stuck, for life! LOL

[Odin2005]

181. Because people become sexually mature on average around 14.

14 is the age when people become adults in most societies, this is because we have evolved to be sexually attracted to people when they become sexually mature for obvious reasons. People getting outraged at an older person bonking a 14YO is a completely cultural thing based on the old sexist crap about protecting a young woman's "sexual purity."

[Lindacooks]

145. Of course!

And I did have a crush on one - my swimming teacher. But if he had ever done anything, or approached me, I would be pretty messed up right now. He acted like a real man - and didn't.

[JI7]

147. don't remember 14 much, but i found guys in their 50s+ attractive at 16

and probably 15 and 14 also. 27 now and still find older guys attractive.

[Scout]

148. i could definitely have been attracted...

not sure if i'd have let myself be seduced at 14. Probably not. But there were some attempts by older men... i found them creepy.

maybe that's why i was a relatively late bloomer. although in hindsight i'm glad. i didn't have sex until 19 yrs, but i also never had an unplanned pregnancy or an std.

[AZBlue]

150. Of course.

We all had a crush on a teacher or coach or friend's brother or something like that.

[FormerOstrich]

151. I went out with a couple of guys in thier...

early 20s when I was 14. Only, I didn't tell them I was 14. I looked older than 14 and had no trouble getting others to believe me. If I was careful, I could get into bars by the time I was sixteen. When I was seventeen the food and beverage managers at the hotel restaurant I worked assumed I was at least 21 and frequently had me bar tend when they needed a fill in.

Every relationship I have had is with a man at least 10 years, if not more my senior. I am recently single again. I was just thinking the other day that maybe it would be nice to date someone my own age....Probably because the ones my age are looking pretty old. I'm 45.

While I don't think I would approve of most, if any 14 year olds, following in my footsteps. I don't really have any regrets. I think you would be hard pressed to say any of the guys took advantage of me.

[RevolutionStartsNow]

153. Depends on the 14 year old. Happened to me, sort of.

When I was 14 I had a big crush on my friend's older brother, who was my track coach; he was 22 or 23. I hung out with a lot of older kids and he was part of our "crowd", even though he was older. He was our big cool friend, and he had a giant purple car.

We had a kind of flirtatious relationship, exchanged mixed tapes (LOL, remember that?), and once at a party when everyone was wasted we kissed a little. But he seemed very cognizant that it was wrong, that I was way too young, and he kind of pushed me away, though I know he liked the attention. Nothing serious ever happened, though it was a major crush for me.

I continued to date and be attracted to older men throughout high school. Some were even way older, including a 38 year old I dated when I was 18 and a 26 year old I dated just before that. I probably had a lot of issues because of my father, but I always liked older men. Even my husband is 12 years older than me -- though he's pretty immature. :)

[FormerOstrich]

155. lol....

Even my husband is 12 years older than me -- though he's pretty immature

I know exactly what you mean. My ex-significant other (of 12 years) was 15 years older than me and I was the mature one.

Thanks for the chuckle!

[RevolutionStartsNow]

156. I used to try that excuse with my parents

They would challenge me when I would date these older guys and I would always say, "But he's immature for his age!" Never worked.

The worst one was when I was dating a guy who was I think 26, and I was 17. We were living in Germany, and he was in the Army. I told my parents he was 21. They asked him at dinner how long he'd been in the service and when Russ automatically answered "8 years", I was busted. :rofl:

[FormerOstrich]

159. I think we might have a lot in common!

I was usually very cautious about revealing my age, but occasionally would slip as Russ did (in reverse of course).

It was not my parents fault. I was somewhat of a master of deceit.

My worst one was, as I am standing in the liquor store bs'ing with the clerk, of the liquor store where I was a regular (wrote checks and everything), I start on some little rant about this and that. On I go....and I say something akin to..."here I am, nineteen and....{o shit}....". I wonder if the look on my face matched his. I changed liquor stores after that....

we laugh now!!! It was hard work back then!

[RevolutionStartsNow]

174. Haha....I think we've lived parallel lives...

My first year in college I used to go to a liquor store every day in my neighborhood where the I would flirt with the older clerk and he'd sell me beer -- he assumed I was 21.

Then on my 21st bday I went in and said, "Hey, it's my 21st birthday, do I get a free sixpack?" and he about died. Hilarious.

Oh yeah I had a brief fling with him, he must have been 40.

I live such a normal life now, it's hard to believe...

[Red Right and BLUE]

154. Yes, I probably could. Depends on the man in question. eom

[eridani]

157. Yes.

In high school, my agemates seemed pretty callow. And I was naive enough that seduction would have been a serious possibility. Luckily, I was a geeky bookworm and kept my nose to the grindstone homework-wise.

[AtomicKitten]

158. yes and yes

But the onus is on the adult.

[magellan]

162. At 14, I was attracted to a 47-year-old man

He was a character on tv, but my crush was very real.

[Bluebear]

164. OK, spill :)

[magellan]

165. Okay, I'm well used to people laughing at me about it

McCoy from Star Trek. He was such a snarky humanitarian. I was SOOOoooo in love....

LOL

[Bluebear]

166. For you, and rock on :)

http://www.sherylfranklin.com/trek_bones.html

[magellan]

169. Thank you! :-)

[lumberjack_jeff]

177. Rock on! Everyone loves a freethinker!

:toast:

I'd only laugh at you if you'd said "Donny Osmond".

[magellan]

194. Donny Osmond? Eww!

I would have laughed at myself! :)

[flordehinojos]

167. Yes, People have.

in countries were it is not a crime to date someone under the age of 18 (if you are over the age of 18) 14 year olds have been known to court, date and marry 23 year olds (or even older). not a crime in those countries. not a crime here at the turn of the century either, i think.

[ShortnFiery]

168. But a "very real" and convictable crime here in 21st Century America

As it should be. The vast store of social psychological evidence indicates, despite one's "natural libidinal urges" to have SEX, children are not capable of giving inform consent. More times than not they are coerced by an Adult.

We all know of cute antidotes, but move to those countries if you think it's A OK to seduce a Minor. Because (and thank God as a parent) in today's America, odds are that you will be charged, convicted and deemed a Sexual Predator for the rest of your life.

[Odin2005]

182. Your culturally-based biases are showing

This "teens are emotionally immature" rhetoric is BS, evolution wouldn't make people sexually mature at 14 and emotionally mature at 18. That 14YO is "emotionally immature" because modern Western society retards teens' emotional development by treating them like children.

[Greyhound]

190. Don't bother, there's a different station tuned in over there.

Just a friendly suggestion. :hi:

[LWolf]

170. Sure.

Having once been an inexperienced, not-fully-mature 14 yo, I would hope that the 23 yo would be principled enough, not to mention smart enough, not to take advantage of budding hormones. And if the principles and brains aren't well developed enough in the 23 yo, perhaps the law might provide a line in the sand.

[noonwitch]

173. Yes, and yes

But the 23 year old man should still know better.

When I was that age, I had a crush on a family friend who was in his 20s. If he had not been a gentleman, he probably could have seduced me.
My brother had a crush on the guy's sister. She actually was a little flirtatious with him, but never ever crossed any kind of line. She just made him feel more adult by talking to him like he was one. She also got him to watch her kids.

[slackmaster]

176. On behalf of a 14-year-old girl who is a neighbor of mine

Not just yes but "HELL YES!", but only if he qualifies as what she considers to be "cute".

[Commie Pinko Dirtbag]

183. When I was 14, I sure as hell was attracted to 23 year old women.

And women are known to sexually mature slightly before men. Do the math.

[bluedeminredstate]

184. Certainly.

I had several crushes on teachers and would have thought it was romantic if any interest was reciprocated (it was not). It wouldn't have taken much to "seduce" me - I would have jumped in willingly without much effort on their part.
This was back in the late 70's and early 80's, mind you. Things have changed enormously since my days of mooning over my sexy Latin teacher.

My 16 y.o. daughter has been talking to me about the activities of the boys and girls her age, and I have to say it has shocked me. Some girls were having sex in the sixth grade, and now at age 16 have had too many partners to count. What's shocking is the recklessness of all this activity - no birth control, no thoughts of STDs, sex at school, and sexual relationships with both male and female with everyone knowing and not having a problem with it. It's not a gay thing, it's more a have-a-good-time thing.
That kind of stunned me the most. If I had told my high school boyfriend that I had sex with several girls before him, it would have been a problem for him. These boys don't seem to care as long as they are getting sex.

Girls are much more vocal and forward about what they want than we ever were at that age. In fact, there have been two different girls that have been to our house who flirted shamelessly with my husband. With the skimpy clothes, the big boobs on display and a very direct manner, my husband felt like he was being sized up and it made him nervous. He told me that whenever either of these girls came over not to leave him alone with them for any reason for any amount of time. He wanted a witness to his behavior should it ever be called into question. He was thinking along the lines of an accusation made by a rejected, angry teen. Having seen the way these girls were flirting, I didn't think he was overreacting.
We're talking girls around age 15 putting out signals to a man in his fifties.

From what I've learned as the mother of a 16 y.o. female, who began "educating" me about 4 years ago, I don't think the age difference between a 14 y.o. and a 23 y.o. would be seen as a big deal to many girls. It's all about the experience.
Whether it's right is another question. I personally would take garden shears to the testicles of any 23 y.o. male who so much as laid a finger on my 14 y.o. daughter!!

[pitohui]

185. could and was

however, those were different times, a 14 year old female's body is still biologically mature and has the same powerful urges, but today i would advise the young girl to think twice -- she would not want to be responsible for a life ruined and the man she loved branded a child molestor if anyone found out

it's hard because i don't think a young girl is crying out to learn from a young boy who is clueless about what to do, it is natural to seek experience and a feeling of being cared for when you are just learning your way around your body, but our society destroys people for doing what is right and natural so what do you do?

in other words, if you are in this situation, get away from it

i would advise the young man the same thing, just don't think a young man is looking for my advice, he would take such advice more seriously from another male

[Fleshdancer]

186. I had a friend who was 15 who dated a twenty-something yr old guy

when I was that age I thought guys who tried to date girls my age were desperate and couldn't find a woman their own age. Obviously I was pretty naive back then. It never occurred to me that a man would really want to hang around someone so young and inexperienced...it just didn't make any sense to me.

My friend, Suzanne, was barely 15 when she started "dating" this older loser. I can't remember his name but I could tell instantly that he was a creep. I think part of the lure for Suzanne was that he made her feel older, he was old enough to buy alcohol and he focused on her. She didn't exactly have the best family life and he was able to pick her up in his car and take her to new places where she could pretend to be someone else for a while. Escapism can be very sexy when you're not happy and at 14, new experiences are that much more exciting.

As adults we don't like to believe this, but there are times when young female teenagers like what they're doing and who they're doing it with. This doesn't make it right of course but girls are just as capable as boys to knowingly engage in reckless behavior. Suzanne knew exactly what she was doing...I and a few other friends kept telling her it was gross, he was too old, he was using her etc, but she didn't care.

[FlaGranny]

187. Interestingly, my parents

met when my mother was 15 and my father was 26. They married a year later and they stayed married for over 60 years until my dad passed on at age 89. They had a great and stable marriage, and they were great parents. What can I say? I guess a 14-year-old girl CAN be attacted to a 23-year-old man. It wasn't as big a deal back in the 1920's, I guess, but I have to admit I'm certainly not normally in favor of such a young person having a relationship with a a person that much older. Most of the time it can't work.

Edit: I, myself, met my first husband at age 14 (he was 19) and we married when I was 16 (in the late 50's). Our marriage was a good one and ended only because he died.

[katamaran]

188. My 38 year old boyfriend just left me for a 21 year old girl

My 38 year old boyfriend just left me for a 21 year old girl, so I'm not the most unbiased person on the subject (I'm a mature 28, so we worked well). We were together seven years, and I discovered a series of emails between the two that exposed his cheating.

He's a manager at a warehouse club where most of his employees are girls between the ages of 18-21. I saw quite often how those girls would try to flirt with him to get their way. He always pushed them away, laughing it off, but apparently his ego inflated enough to begin dating the sister of one of his employees. He's a very nice-looking, well dressed, charismatic man in a position of power. Those little girls eat that crap up.

He left the one he loves for the one he likes. I'm a little bitter right now.

[Thickasabrick]

196. Ouch. It may not feel like it right now, but it's better he showed his

stripes now before you invested any more of your life with him. My mom had friends that had 60 year old husbands divorce their wives of the same age for thirty year olds.

They probably wished they had found out about them while they were still in their twenties. Hang in there. You deserve better.

[katamaran]

201. Oh.. and she's a fundy Republican too!

For a guy who who curses God every day of his life, the fact that this girl is a super fundy Republican is almost laughable to me. He went from a tall, strong-willed, liberal, agnostic girlfriend to short, ditzy, conservative, Baptist who goes to Bob Jones U. She's almost my EXACT opposite.

If I wasn't so pissed, I would laugh my ass off about it.

[Orangepeel]

189. plenty of 14 year old girls have crushes on young men

(music) Don't stand... don't stand... don't stand so close to me (/music)

Lots of 14 year old girls (and boys) think they are grown-ups. Real grown-ups have the responsibility to know that they aren't.

[philosophie_en_rose]

191. The question is whether an adult should have sex with children.

Answer: no.

Regardless of whether a young person is capable of having sex or even wants to have sex, it is irresponsible for an adult to take advantage of a child.

NAMBLA is not okay.

[H2O Man]

195. Right.

Very well said. I agree 100%.

[Thickasabrick]

197. Depends on your definition of "adult" and "child" and what

culture you belong to.

[philosophie_en_rose]

199. Culture is not an excuse for exploitation

Abusing a position of power is not okay. And many ugly abuses are masked under the excuse of culture.

Rape is a fact in this country. It is not okay.

I personally don't find it a hardship to refrain from 'seducing' minors.

[Thickasabrick]

206. I think rape is condemed in any culture. Many cultures marry

off their daughters who may be as young as 12 and it's "normal". We would probably consider that child abuse but that line of thought is not held universally.

Again, I think it depends on whatever people view as the definition of "child" and "adult".

[wildhorses]

193. At the age of 15 I went out with a 23 yo for a couple of dates...

He was a nice stand up guy just back from Nam. He was very repsectful but, he was looking to get married and start a family. He stated his intentions. I was like :wow: I'm just a sophmore. So, no I guess could not be seduced by him :shrug:

[Sparkly]

198. Well, I for one...

... think these discussions are fascinating, if not scientific. (And I may be guilty of starting some of this, but I am not sorry!)

At 14, yes I could have been attracted by a 23-yr-old man. Seduced by him though -- No.

[tinfoil tiaras]

202. Yeah

If the 23 year old man was cute and nice and funny and awesome.

I've always had a thing for older guys, though I've never dated any of 'em, so that might explain how I feel.

It would be rape but...yeah, you could be attracted to a 23 year old man.

[debbierlus]

203. Why are you asking this?

[BrightBlueDot]

205. ONLY under this circumstance:

He tells me he's in love with me and really makes me believe it. Then the fourteen year old me could've been seduced by a 23 year old. ONLY if I was deceived, in other words.

[laundry_queen]

207. At 14 I had a 20 yo boyfriend.

Now, to be fair to him, he had no idea I was 14 - at that point I looked old enough to get into bars without ID (legal age was 18 then) and all my friends were older than 16. We never had sex, but, well, we did other things. When he did find out my age, he was a bit freaked, but didn't break it off (for a few months anyway for something unrelated). I have nothing but wonderful memories of the time I was with him.
Truthfully, my 20 yo boyfriend treated me 100 times better than any of the same-age asshole boyfriends I had later on. Age is nothing but a number - sometimes that saying is very true.
Not all 14 year olds were like me at 14, however. And not all 20 year olds were like my boyfriend. And sometimes the date-rapist assholes can be the same age as you. :(