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We're all in agreement that both Shrub and Cheney need to go away, and Cheney needs to go first.
It's a three-step process.
Step One is to get sixteen or seventeen Senate Republicans angry enough to vote to convict in the Senate. There are 48 of them over there now. Twenty-one are up for election in 2008; another nineteen in 2010. That's 40, and of those 40 there have to be 17 who like their seats more than they like The Little Fuehrer. Mitch McConnell wouldn't like it very much if some nice Democrat ran a double-truck ad in every newspaper in Kentucky the day before the election that contained the names and photos of every member of the 101st Airborne Division who died in Iraq after he voted to acquit Shrub. Elizabeth Dole wouldn't survive in NC if we did the same thing with members of the 82nd Airborne, nor would John Cornyn with Fort Hood-based KIAs. Senators may like Shrub, but they like being senators more.
Step Two is for the Senior Republicans we speak about, ones like the men who ran Nixon off, to have a little chat with Bush. They need to tell him that he's been good for the nation (a lie, but they're going to have to lie a lot here) and that they appreciate everything he's done to fight terrorism (another lie), but...well, George, you've turned into Benito Mussolini (a half-truth; they can't really mention who he's turned into because you KNOW Bush has no idea who Nicolae Ceaucescu was) and we just can't have that. (Here starts the unvarnished truth.) You've been in office for six and a half years. In that time, your policies have bankrupted the nation. You started a civil war in Iraq that has killed 3500 American soldiers plus a couple thousand American citizens on the battlefield, that has caused about twice that many to die of wounds and that has left tens of thousands of them permanently crippled. You promised to capture Osama bin Laden and then you forgot all about him. You destroyed the Permanent Republican Majority in Congress, and the blogosphere is debating as to whether shooting, hanging or hara-kiri is the proper punishment for you. Plus, there are thirty Republican senators--REPUBLICAN! senators--who are willing to cross party lines, right now, and vote to throw you out of office. George, you can't be president any longer. You don't even like this job. You might remember that in 1974, senior Republicans had a talk with President Nixon that was kind of like this one. They promised him that if he chose Gerald Ford as his vice president and then resigned for the good of the country, he'd be pardoned. We can't pardon you. You've committed too many crimes, and some of them are capital offenses. Yes, George, that's right. Some of the things you have done qualify you for the death penalty. We don't really want to execute you, but we will if we have to. George, here's a tissue. It's going to be okay. Stop your crying and we'll get you an ice cream. Now look. We can't pardon you and you can't resign, but if you choose Representative Walter Jones as Vice President Cheney's replacement, we'll be sure to only impeach you on a few charges and then bring you up on criminal charges only on crimes that aren't capital. You committed so many crimes, we can find a few things that won't cost you your life. You'll lose your pension, the fines will take everything you have, and you won't ever be allowed to sit on a corporate board or work with securities, but we promise you that if you do everything exactly the way we tell you, you won't get more than ten years in prison, and we can get you a job as shift manager of a barbecue joint in Memphis. You won't be rich anymore, but you'll be comfortable.
And Step Three is for Bush to be impeached and removed.
Et voila! Walter Jones as president.
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