Bush Sees WMD as Key to Fresh New Way Forward in Iraq

[bustarbusto]

Bush Sees WMD as Key to Fresh New Way Forward in Iraq

"President Bush announced today his "Fresh New Way Forward" plan for Iraq, the strategy for which hinges primarily on the equipping of Iraqi forces with advanced weapons of mass destruction, or WMD. The Fresh New Way Forward plan, or FNWF, is touted as a necessary follow-up to capitalize on the New Way Forward plan from March of this year, which hinged primarily on additional troop escalations over the January, 2007 Surge."

...

"Iraq is currently in the grip of a range of destabilizing forces, both internal and external," Secretary Rice said. "Given that the American people recognize the challenge and promise of Iraq and share the resolve to see that promise through to victory, it would be reprehensible for us to refrain from providing the weaponry needed to help Prime Minister Maliki meet those challenges."

"Tactical nuclear weapons will be delivered within weeks to help Maliki construct a deterrent to Iran and Syria's cross-border interventions, and to counter large-scale insurgency operations," Secretary Rice continued.

Complete article

[Solly Mack]

1. lolololol Not a funny haha laugh either

Damn

[Clark2008]

2. Good God. The irony here is so thick you could cut it with a knife.

Geesch!

[notadmblnd]

3. So we attacked them because they had WMDs and found none

and now we want to give them WMDs so they do have them?:crazy:

[jeff30997]

4. That's totally insane!!!

:grr:

[neoblues]

5. Bush's "new" plan?

The "Fresh Updated Current Knockout Expedited Distracting Ultimate Power, New Way Forward" or
"FUCKEDUP,NWF", which, alas, is pretty much the same as the Old Way Forward.

[matcom]

6. LMAO!

even funnier are the reactions so far. folks, its a satire site. :rofl:

[mogthemonk]

8. Damn!

Beat me to it matcom!

[matcom]

9. welcome to DU!

:hi:

[bdamomma]

14. welcome to DU mogthemonk

:hi:

[davekriss]

10. I was just saying...

...this has gotta' be the Onion. Too mad, even for the madness of King George!

[Drifter]

11. Indeed ...

Notice the date of the article is a few months in the future.
In fact that's what this site does, "Tomorrows news Today".

Cheers
Drifter

[mogthemonk]

7. LOL. I know it's unseasonably warm where i am

but it's not quite April weather yet!

Here's the disclaimer from the website:



Disclaimer
All material published on Avant News, with the possible exception of information provided by external sites, is fictitious, satirical, and intended for entertainment purposes only. While many of the individuals and entities appearing in articles on Avant News are real, all events, quotations and anything else having to do with those individuals and entities are entirely fictitious. As far as we know.

[malaise]

12. Profound

but remember Bush's WMDs are weapons of freedom. Ignore the fact that this means freedom from live for anyone who does lot lie back and allow him and his financiers to loot and plunder the resources belonging to other people.
And when US soldiers die they too are merely collateral damage.

[bdamomma]

13. he can take his slogan and shove them up his a$$

[MadHound]

15. Ironic as this news is, there's a bit more disturbing news further in

"To further speed the transition of Iraq to a full-fledged Jeffersonian democracy, Secretary Rice said, the United States will sanction a series of short-term measures proposed by Prime Minister Maliki's administration to "quell violence or the incitement to violence and repress anti-democracy-building activities".

These measures include: the indefinite imposition of martial law; the dissolution of the Iraqi Parliament and most of its ministries; a temporary suspension of press freedom, with all publications and broadcasts to require the prior approval of the Prime Minister; the purging of Islamists from all branches of federal, provincial, and local government; the suspension of term limits for the Prime Minister; and a country-wide sunset curfew to remain in effect "until things start to quiet down".

So in other words, we're going to set up another dictatorship in Iraq, one complete with WMDs(most likely nuclear) and then leave.

And the Saddam regime was so horrible because. . .?

Geez this is insanity.