|
There was a headline today saying something to the effect of, "Bush Confident Bin Laden Will Be Caught" (which is a flip-flop-flip, if you think of it), and someone at Yahoo posted this brilliant list of the rest of Bush's "confidence" headlines:
_____________________________________________________
Bush confident Iraqis will one day greet us with flowers & sweets that aren't booby-trapped or poisoned
Bush confident Muslims understand that their 250,000 war dead just barely makes up for the 2~3,000 WTC victims
Bush confident Iraq war will pay for itself & actually turn a profit
Bush confident the world still grateful to & supports America (except for those pesky Fwench!)
Bush confident Iraq still has Weapons of Mass Destruction or Minuscule Disruption or Muslim Design or.....
Bush confident the world understands that US atomic weapons aren't WMDs but rather the righteous sword of God
Bush confident only way to disarm the WMD-less Iraqis is through invasion & use of massive "Daisy Cutter" bombs
Bush confident that his revelations "US Addicted to Oil & Promote Alternative Energy" was something new
Bush confident that "Stay the course" has no connection with lemmings
Bush confident "Shock & Awe" tactics will earn the gratitude & respect of the Iraqi & Muslim people everywhere
Bush confident his Darth Vader & the Evil Empire action-dolls only represent Saddam Hussein
Bush confident we will soon catch Osama Bin Laden or that he will simply give himself up
Bush confident the Iraqi people will understand US takeover of oil revenues, their only viable national Product
Bush confident US Port Security can be outsourced to the UAE where 2 of the 9/11 attackers came from
Bush confident the war ended years ago & that the insurgents are witless, disorganized & few
Bush confident that his family friends, the Bin Ladins, will eventually give him Osama's telephone number
Bush confident "Brownie" is doing a heck of a job at FEMA
Bush confident New Orleans levees will hold
Bush confident outing covert CIA agent isn't treason
Bush confident Cheney wasn't drunk when he shot a guy in the face
Bush confident Cheney will make the perfect choice for president in the next election
Bush confident that Evolution is just a passing phase & that Intelligent Design points to his terms of office
Bush confident cutting student loans or not allowing foreign study visas won't effect students or colleges
Bush confident cutting scientist working on renewable energies will cure addiction to oil
Bush confident he doesn't know Jack Abramoff
Bush confident he doesn't know Ken "kenny-boy" Lay that well
Bush confident 34% approval rating just a liberal media's invention & so makes him most popular president ever
Bush confident his policies won't replace record surplus with largest deficit in history
Bush confident destroying social security is the only way to save it
Bush confident Seniors can afford medication & health insurance 'cause his family can
Bush confident Seniors will figure out how to live on $2 a day because they have good-ol-fashioned US "No-How"
Bush confident Bin-Laden will be captured by sending Afghans to Torra Borra & Guantanamo Bay
Bush confident he can forever tap anyone's phones for whatever reason anytime because of 9/11 & Pearl Harbor
Bush confident torture legal being righteous Christian & therefore better than Saddam Hussein, a known criminal
Bush confident Supreme Court Nominee Mrs Miers was a well researched choice by his ever-so-competent staff
Bush confident the notion of checks & balances isn't mandatory
Bush confident American really want a monarchy & the continuation of the crusades
Bush confident he'll think up an exit strategy to all his blunders, crimes & inaccurate claims (imprisonment?)
Bush confident Iraq not on precipice of civil war because Cheney, Rice, Rumsfeld & Mommy say so
Bush confident US Presidency always determined by Supreme Court not the people
Bush confident Americans citizens have no right to meddle in or be informed of government affairs
Bush confident The Constitution an outdated document, but not as outdated as the Bible & so carries less weight
Bush confident he has a mandate to find and/or fabricate a mandate to match whatever he needs a mandate for
Bush confident FEMA can handle the Bird Flu
Bush confident he doesn't need to immediately cut his month-long vacation to tend to New Orleans
Bush confident he is surrounded by competent staff & administration
Bush confident "Fool me once, Fool me twice, Shame on you" actually makes sense
Bush confident he won the election fairly
Bush confident upon hearing of WTC strike, that continuing to read to photo-op kids showed his decisiveness
Bush confident God is on his side
Bush confident God is on his side & hates all Muslims & so has suspended "Thou shalt not kill" temporarily
Bush confident that no-one would find out that the turkey he gave to the soldiers in Iraq was actually plastic
Bush confident that if he dons a flight suit on a carrier that he would appear willing to die for freedom
Bush confident prior to 9/11 he should concentrate more on China and missile defense than terrorism
Bush confident to disregard Aug 6 2001 PDB "Bin-Laden will strike in US" and continue his month-long vacation
Bush confident incompetence is an asset 'cause it's cute
Bush confident he has the Black vote because he flew over New Orleans a few times to feel their pain
Bush confident American people have week-long memory & are fooled by smoke & mirror ploys...(ooops!.. oh well)
Bush confident in his confidence
Bush confident he may be the worst president in US history but not in world history & so still has latitude
|
Printer-friendly format
Email this thread to a friend
Bookmark this thread
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
