Sick about fighting family on this years "gay oscars".... it wasn't "gay"

[julialnyc]

I have one relative in particular who just wants to argue with me about how Hollywood is doing the democrats a disservice by throwing their exaggerated agenda down the publics throat (this is all he will argue with me about--- nevermind the real problems out there). I don't know why I let it get under my skin so much, but when he talks about this year being the "gay" year I want to hit him. Brokeback Mountain was a love story....and out of any of the films you could say that it approached homosexuality by making anyone with a heart see that love is love and bigotry not only hurts the victims of hate, but everyone around them.

But Capote just happened to be a gay man (what did that have to do with the film?) He was an eccentric outsider in Kansas,but how on earth could call that a "gay film".

And Transamerica is not about a homosexual. It is about someone who is transgender (the character would not consider herself gay).



I know it is silly to argue about movies, but it just gives me a window to see how small minded and ignorant people are that they won't even give a movie a chance (let alone an actual person).

[ClassWarrior]

1. Read some Lakoff for some tips on how to frame the...

...marriage rights argument. You should be able to find some articles at http://www.rockridgeinstitute.org/,

16+5=2006

NGU.

[thinkingwoman]

2. Try a new tactic

A new tactic was talked about here on DU a few weeks ago (sorry, no caffeine yet, so no searching)...

Try responding with "So?"

Every time your family member tries to start the it was a gay year fight, respond with "So?"

Whatever comes out next..."So?"

Keep going to his/her head explodes.

It's fun. Really.

[TallahasseeGrannie]

14. A similar approach

is raised eyebrows... "And?"

[thinkingwoman]

20. Ahh, Grannie...

you always seem to know just the right thing to say!

"And?" is so much less smartass than "So?"...I think I'll switch to it.

[mondo joe]

3. Take a cue from Clooney: Hollywood is always ahead of the curve.

Hollywood leads the way on social issues - racial issues, women's issues, gay issus.

Hollywood is the weather forecast of what's coming. Your relative should bee pleased to hear it.

[gratuitous]

4. Ask your relative . . .

When was the last time he watched the unwatchable "Passion of the Christ"?

[kevinbgoode]

5. Ask that stupid relative. . .and I mean STUPID

just how many movies about gay lives should be allowed to be made. . .? ASK them. . .ask them if every movie should be REQUIRED to be made about only approved heterosexual lives, and which church should dictate that to the whole country? Ask them how many gay movies have been made, how many movies are made each year, and why they think the percentage of gay films is just too high?

And then ask the stupid dunce if they think it is possible for a film with gay characters to be made well. . .and if they are equal Americans, shouldn't they have the same opportunity to see a movie about their lives every FIVE years as he gets about his own damned life every week? Ask him how many real superheroes are out there and why they are all always straight. . .you mean he would rather see movies with stunt doubles pretending to be the stars acting like heroes to be worshipped by adolescent boys who jump off their toolsheds with towels used as capes because they thought they could fly like Superman?

[BlueManDude]

6. Not to mention - were any of the nominees actually "gay"?

Seemed like a bunch of straight people writing about gays and portraying gay characters.

[julialnyc]

8. I love making this point

Brokeback Mountain was written by a woman and directed by a straight man (and acted by two straight men). People shouldn't have to "be someone" in order to have the perspective and compassion to see when a group of people are being treated with injustice. The writer of Crash is a white man who saw the injustice of racism. Even Munich (directed by Spielberg) took an interesting look at terrorism and the price of revenge. He caught a lot of slack from the jewish community for this.


A movie is an experience that you can take it or leave it, but to freak out that people are putting garbage in people's mind, doesn't speak highly for these "minds" which don't know how to reach their own conclusions.

Everyone likes to make fun of Hollywood, but I tank them this year for bringing up some very important discussions.

[aintitfunny]

7. He sounds obsessed

"Methinks he doth protest too much" Is your relative just spouting manufactured right wing nonsense to avoid the real issues or could this be a tragic case of raging homophobia?

[julialnyc]

9. spouting manufactured nonsense

he's in local politics...... and spends lots of tine with my two best friends (who happen to be gay) when we have summer parties, barbeque's,ect...

I always tell him he should think of them when he spouts this crap, but he insists that he is not homophobic--- but then says anyone can do what they want in private. I say why does anyone need to hide? (this can go on and on)

[bigscott]

10. Jesus christ almighty

I am gay and did not like BBM. I am gay and would rather read "In Cold Blood" than go see Capote. I am gay and would love to see TransAmerica (which is NOT gay). Why is it these people protest about this shit?? They usually LOVE "will and grace" because the "fags" are limp wristed stereotypes that fit the mold these assholes think all gays should fit into. Ask this relative why he is so obsessed with homosexuality in every day life. Sounds to me like he is a closet case and not a homophobe (or maybe a self-hating closet case??)

[Bucky]

11. Would it be helpful to accuse your relative of getting a boner forClooney?

[julialnyc]

13. Oh... I've gone there

he's not in the closest..... he is part of local republican politics and this crap is his social life. He just spews talking points for the sake of arguing. if he could get his head out of his ass he might just learn something..... he was married to a big time liberal for over 20 years and she did leave some sensibility with him..... he just wants to be part of "the club" right now (being around money can change people). He's off in Republican never never land right now (I hope we get him back)

[baby_mouse]

12. He sounds like he needs a shag. Hook him up with some nice progressive l.

Ya never know, it MIGHT work...

[SmokingJacket]

15. So what if it was gay?

Gay people are prominent in the arts, so why shouldn't they be visible?

No one's stopping republicans and freepers from making movies.

[julialnyc]

16. there's nothing wrong with a movie being gay, but being labeled "gay"

because someone happens to be gay ina movie doesn't not make it gay. Was "All the Presidents Men"and straight movie because the writers were straight? No, their sexuality was of no consequence to the story.


and Transgender is not gay..... so I have a problem with people not even trying to grasp that there is a difference.



I have no problem with a movie where the topic is all about being gay, but when a movie is summed up by the characters sexuality rather than the story line I have a problem.

[Beausoir]

17. I actually had to toss someone off a discussion board I run because of

this. She was just outraged over BrokeBack Mountain. She admits to never seeing it. When BrokeBack didn't win best picture the other evening, she went nuts! She was soooo happy. She was in-your-face confrontational about it. She made statements like "Homophobia implies fear....I am NOT afraid of them. I just disagree with their choice to be gay." and "NOBODY is born gay!"

Many of my members are gay, all of them are very nice people and they were really offended. So, I gave her the boot. First time I've ever done it and I feel badly.

Something about that movie really rattles them.

[julialnyc]

18. that movie rattles them because if they had the open mind to actually see

that movie rattles them because if they had the open mind to actually see the movie they would leave feeling pretty bad about themselves. with this relative of mine I said to him forget what you think about the story of the two men in the movie.... look at the two women, do you want your daughter to marry a man who doesn't love her in the way she deserves because he feels like he is forced into a life of lies? this of course after I explain the movie (because he won't go see it (but he'll be getting the dvd for Christmas)

[Hamlette]

19. these are the same arguments they used in support of slavery

against civil rights and against interracial marriage

tell him gays have to come out of the closet and get all in our faces about it because otherwise they are beaten to death and left to die in fields in Wyoming. (or lynched, as blacks were in the south prior to the King Jr. and the civil rights movement, another in your face moment when we heard all these arguments)

If we left civil rights up to the republican party everyone except white, hetero, christian men would be in burkas at the back of the bus and in fear for their lives.

Ask him why people who are different from him make him feel so threatened?

And remind him that winning isn't worth spit if you're wrong. That given the choice between winning an election or being true to the very foundation of the American ideal, treating everyone equally and with respect, we Dems have refused to sell out ever since that day we kicked the racists out of our party. You know, the ones who became Republicans and now hate gays too?

One gay oscars out of 78? And it didn't even win? Get out.