Funniest LTTE Ever!

[onager]

:rofl:

"PH.D?"

Published recently in the Scranton TIMES:

"Yank tax dollars for arts in schools

Editor: I am concerned about this current trend among “artists” to disrespect the conservative Christian values that our fathers, brothers and sons have fought and died for. The disrespect that these “creative” types have for the core moral fiber of our freedom-loving society is tantamount to high treason. Television, motion pictures, literature, plays, music and visual arts have all given rise to anti-American propaganda that is aimed at one target audience, alone — our children.

This is an abomination of our free-speech rights that cannot be allowed to continue. Imagine a generation of children growing up with a Green Day view of life that insinuates that our elected leaders, chosen by the voting majority, are nothing more than “American Idiots.” What about the Hollywood agenda to promote socialist-leaning candidates and anti-war-on-terror movies like “Syrianna” and Michael Moore’s disturbing pro-al-Qaida propaganda films? What about the preponderance of alternative lifestyle movies such as “Brokeback Mountain” and “TransAmerica”? This trend needs to be stopped immediately before our great nation succumbs to moral ambiguity. The malleable minds of our children are at stake.

My suggestion for solving this problem is simple: cut tax dollars for arts funding in our public schools. The arts are a breeding ground for anti-American sentiment that cannot be tolerated in our post- 9/11 world. Paintings of trees and placid scenes of natural beauty are sadly being replaced by images of President Bush as a buffoonish, uncomprehending “American Idiot.” Worse yet, these neo-artists depict our sacred religious icons in unspeakable ways that I will refrain from describing. Our kids are being brainwashed by these left-wing Nazis who pretend to be cool and trendy. I, for one, do not want my tax dollars to pay the salaries of leftist propaganda fomenters.

The money spent on arts programs, theater productions, speech league competitions and other “questionable value” expenditures could be better used to fund sports-based programs. These programs teach children to be a team player. They prepare kids for a life as a co-worker, solid citizen, and, if necessary, as a soldier to help fight the war on terror. Statistically, children who excel at sports do better in life than those who paint hateful pictures.

Do the right thing. Call your representative and demand that art programs be cut from our public schools. The fragile minds of our greatest resource are at risk.

MICHAEL D. LEONARD, PH.D."

Found it here: http://www.fstdt.com

[kiraboo]

1. Don't laugh.

I know people who'd support Mr. Leonard. One neighbor won't let his wife have flowers in her yard because they "encourage liberalism". This is the absolute truth. And yes, they are fundmentalist christians.

[Mythsaje]

4. Flowers encourage liberalism?

Wow.

Hey, buddy. Think much?

[ReadTomPaine]

6. That's one creepy neighbor. n/t

[Caoimhe]

17. I guess they don't have flowers at their church eh?

If we convince Rethuglicans that being stupid is a direct route to hell, will they start trying to edumacate themselves?

[drm604]

26. Nope,

they'll just redefine the word "stupid".

[Ian David]

20. I thought he was being ironic. n/t

[drm604]

33. Ohmigod, I think you're right.

Duh! Why didn't I see that.

[AllieB]

50. Me too.

:shrug:

[theHandpuppet]

35. I can match that one

My brother won't let his little boy wear sandals even in the summertime because he says only queers wear sandals and he doesn't want his boy growing up to be gay. Never mind that he has a sister and a daughter who are gay. :eyes: When I suggested (sarcastically) he could push his son into football when he's older (his son prefers drawing to sports) he said the boy will NOT play football, he will play golf. Yeah, golf -- that truly manly game that he prefers.

Something tells me there's some confusion there, y'know?

[ucmike]

46. no man-on-man touching in golf, maybe????

[theHandpuppet]

52. Yeah, I guess that must be it

Never considered that possibility before, but then my bro's reasoning usually escapes me. Here's a guy who loves cooking and art and does his own crafts (even makes his own candy) but he's hung up on "manliness".

[giant_robot]

48. Actually, I think your brother might be onto something...

[chicofaraby]

55. At a dinner one night, a right wing guy said loudly

that he was opposed to the "liberal conspiracy" to teach children in Texas to speak Spanish. It seems this "makes multi-culturalism OK" and it's not.

I laughed out loud and started to continue with the joke until I noticed... he wasn't joking. The table just froze. Then one lady changed the subject with a complete non-sequiter and the dinner conversation picked up and moved on. No one called the guy out, but it was clear that EVERYONE thought he was nuts. I've never seen such a beautiful use of social manners to shut someone down outside of an Oscar Wilde play.

[Aviation Pro]

2. Where did he get his degree from?

Sears?

[meegbear]

Doctorate in Applicance Repair

[Mythsaje]

3. Hey, as an artist

I resemble those comments!

Sports? LOL. Yeah, it's not as though they don't foster bullying and overly competitive behavior in a sizable minority.

I've got some moral ambiguity for ya right here, buddy.

[Aviation Pro]

10. Bottom line....

Sports are the easy opium to the masses. Academics, on the other hand, are tough and rigorous, our little gym-rat, pussy PResident should know as a member of the second-tier club.

[Mythsaje]

21. I have a friend who used to say that about sports...

They're a ridiculous distraction from important matters, in my opinion. I like baseball okay, but I'm definitely not rabid about it. I don't get rabid sports fans.

[RubyDuby in GA]

29. Goes back to the Romans....Bread and Circuses

Keep 'em fed and entertained and the masses won't notice you're destroying civilization.

[BootinUp]

5. Is that sarcasm or a serious letter.

:wow:

[mitchum]

16. I honestly think that it's well-done sarcasm

[EstimatedProphet]

44. Unfortunately, it may be TOO well done

Freepers will sue this letter in their arguments. It leads them along, but it doesn't lead them along and then make them look stupid, like it should. It needs a punchline.

[madinmaryland]

7. What schools have kids painting hateful pictures?

My daughter is still painting trees and animals, and she is in public school.

:wtf:

[meegbear]

11. But they're HATEFUL trees and animals ...

your liberal views are blinding you.

[madinmaryland]

14. Oh, thats right. They are getting in the way of "The Healthy

Forests Initiative"!

:sarcasm:

[RubyDuby in GA]

32. Is she painting those "killer trees" that Reagan talked about?

I bet those kinds of trees would be ok with this letter writer. Sheesh! What a moran! :eyes:

[madinmaryland]

45. I forgot that trees are the biggest polluters

in the world!!

[centristo]

8. uh

"Statistically, children who excel at sports do better in life than those who paint hateful pictures."

Tell that to O.J.

[Bake]

43. I didn't know there had been such a study done

At least not one that compared "excelling in sports" to "painting hateful pictures." LOL!!

Bake

[MuseRider]

9. Thwack them over the head with

your bible "Dr." Leonard until we return to the Dark Ages. What a lovely plan.

[Caoimhe]

12. Those darn arterrorists

making our flock think for themselves, how DARE THEY? This guy cannot be a PHD.

[ET Awful]

13. Really Leonard?

Your beloved pretzeldent was a frickin' cheerleader, he didn't exactly excel at sports.

Let's look at some folks who didn't excel at sports shall we? How about Bill Gates, hardly the epitome of a sports icon there, I'd say he did pretty good in life. How about Steven Hawking? I doubt seriously he was out playing football with the guys (granted he was on a rowing team before illness destroyed that capacity, but he is far more deserving of his PhD than you are).

Or, let's look at. . . me for instance. I never played any sports as a kid (other than riding a bike or a skateboard around the neighborhood). . . guess what, not only am I perfectly happy with my life, but I actually served in the military.

You're a loon Leonard, and you are an American Idiot.

[LibDemAlways]

15. What bogus on-line buy-a-degree site did

that "moran" get his "PH.D" from? Who needs artists and other creative people anyway? Didn't God intend us all to be cogs in the war machine? Talk about American Idiots. This guy is the poster child.

[Richard Steele]

18. ART is the last refuge of TRUTH when our 'reality' is overrun by LIES.

That's why these B*shloving asswipes FEAR it so much.
It can show TRUTH on a level that their dishonest,
delusional words can never hope to touch.

[Minnesota Libra]

19. That's not funny - that's effing scary - that jerk means it nt

[tonkatoy57]

22. Too bad Michael D. Leonard, PH.D isn't a MD...

...Then he could adjust his own meds.

Wow. Just. Wow.

That may be the most over the top, mouth breathing, deranged, foolishness I've ever read.

May we can all pitch in and get the good Dr. Leonard a subscription to Soviet Realism magazine. I'm sure he's dig all of the politically correct depictions of the New Soviet Man.

I don't suppose it would make any sense to point out to Dr. Leonard that artists have traditionally been society's "canary in the the coal mine", when it comes to pointing out societal inequities and imbalances.

I wonder if he knows the turmoil that Dimitri Shostakovitch felt after crawling in bed with Stalin? Wonder if he would care? Nah.

[Odin2005]

23. What a moran.

Although I do have a problem with funding "art" that is simply designed to shock and "Abstract art" that is just a mess of paint requiring no artisitic talent, I don't give a flying fuck what the fundies want.

[xultar]

24. People don't realise how crazy these nutbags are. There are more

of them than we'd like to admit. Plus if you push the fence sitters they will fall on the side of Jesus. So, there is a real issue here.

[onager]

36. You're absolutely right, Xultar

Just click that link to FSTDT and find out HOW right you are! (FSTDT="Fundies Say The Darnedest Things")

Even making allowance for the ranting teens/subteens (apparently) from MySpace.com, FSTDT is chock full of posts that make Mr. Leonard seem downright reasonable. Posts calling for the subjugation of women (some written by Fundie women); posts denouncing "race-mixers;" constant attacks on scientists, artists, and all religions other than Xianity.

It's amazing. I usually find them funny. But even I have to admit that after reading the same belligerence, ignorance and hatred over and over, I sometimes reach a tipping point.

Then I usually feel like the nurse in the great old play The Man Who Came To Dinner:

"I became a nurse to help suffering humanity. But after meeting you, I'm getting a job in a bomb factory. I think the human race should be wiped out as soon as possible!"

[drm604]

25. Statistically...

"Statistically, children who excel at sports do better in life than those who paint hateful pictures."

I wonder what the statistics are comparing sportsmen to people who paint non-hateful pictures? :eyes:

I don't even know where to start at picking apart this idiotic rant.

Suffice it to say that I don't think that taking crayons, construction paper, paste, etc. away from our children will produce the reactionary paradise the author seems to crave.

Of course if our kindergartners no longer have those little rounded scissors then they won't be able to hijack any airplanes. So maybe he does have a point. :sarcasm:

[FlaGranny]

37. What about people who paint pictures

of sports? Where do they stand?

[American Tragedy]

27. This cannot be for real.

[warrens]

28. I think it's a joke

It's too over the top to be serious. And the repeated use of "president" and "idiot" in the same sentences was done for effect, I think.

Of course, he could just be a total loon, but it looks like satire to me.

[Swamp Rat]

30. I got your "neo-art" right here mutherfucker!

Oh, and I plan to teach every child I know to do the same. HA! :D

[NV Whino]

31. Not to worry

There hasn't been any money for art in schools for years.

[johnnie]

34. This guy is an ass

"Paintings of trees and placid scenes of natural beauty are sadly being replaced by images of President Bush as a buffoonish, uncomprehending “American Idiot.”"

Um, Mr Leonard, those "paintings" of "President Bush as a buffoonish, uncomprehending “American Idiot.”" that you speak of aren't paintings. They are AP photographs.

[Lautremont]

38. It's a gag for sure. (nt)

[phusion]

39. Oh the hypocrisy:

"This is an abomination of our free-speech rights that cannot be allowed to continue."

:rofl:

[maveric]

40. "Michael Moore’s disturbing pro-al-Qaida propaganda films."???

I didnt realize that Michael Moore was pro-al-Qaida.

These people are delusional.

[0rganism]

41. I do think that classtime allocated to athletics needs to be increased

Of course, I disagree with everything else "Dr. Michael D. Leonard" says, and fervently hope he was waxing sarcastic.

When we are faced with record levels of child obesity and related disorders, forcing prescription medication into schoolchildren for disruptive hyperactivity, and hi-carb lunchrooms are supplemented by huge doses of supersaturated sugar solutions from brightly-colored vending machines, a good case can be made for an enhanced program of daily athletics and health training.

To do so at the expense of the already-minimal arts programs would be tragic.

You could do a lot worse than having the first hour of each schoolday devoted to healthy exercise of some kind.

[Mythsaje]

51. I recommend Tai-Chi, myself...

Or something similar. Maybe Aikido.

[TahitiNut]

42. How about children who excel at cheerleading??

Inquiring minds want to know? :dunce:

[reichstag911]

47. Dr. Leonard is right;...

...we do need to take action "before our great nation succumbs to moral ambiguity." Damn it, let's keep our great nation right where it's at: mired in moral insipidity and depravity.

[genie_weenie]

49. This has to be one of those form letters

that Conservative X-tian groups distribute to their members every sunday.

And I think the issue goes back to people who hold the ideological viewpoint that a culture or society can "evolve" to a pinnacle or perfect condition, and that current cultural changes are a retardant to the striving for perfection.

[karlrschneider]

53. What's a "PH.D"? Doctor of titration?

:eyes:

[NinetySix]

56. Ph.D. = Posthole Digger

n/t

[progressoid]

54. It's a little troubling when it's hard to tell if its satire or real...n/t