Pentagon plans cyber-insect army (AFFIRMS LUNATICS IN CHARGE)

[Ripley]

An Active Imagination simply cannot compete with these Freaks at DARPA who have a 2 billion budget and 240 personnel. Good thing New Orleans doesn't need any rebuilding money or anything. I think I'll take some LSD and go on an interview for a job there. I'll probably get a corner office.

The Pentagon's defence scientists want to create an army of cyber-insects that can be remotely controlled to check out explosives and send transmissions.

The idea is to insert micro-systems at the pupa stage, when the insects can integrate them into their body, so they can be remotely controlled later.

Experts told the BBC some ideas were feasible but others seemed "ludicrous".

A similar scheme aimed at manipulating wasps failed when they flew off to feed and mate.

The new scheme is a brainwave of the Defence Advanced Research Projects Agency (Darpa), which is tasked with maintaining the technological superiority of the US military.

It has asked for "innovative" bids on the insect project from interested parties.

DARPA SCHEMES
Arpanet information processing system - a precursor to the internet
Self Healing Minefield - the mines reconfigure themselves to fill gaps when one or more are stepped on
Brain Interface Programme to wire soldiers directly into their machines
Mechanical Elephant to penetrate dense Vietnam War jungle. Unused
Policy Analysis Market - online futures market where "traders" wager on future terrorism and assassinations
Computer game, Tactical Iraqi, to teach troops how to decipher Iraqi body language


http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/americas/4808342.stm

[MadMaddie]

1. The Pentegon can't even get it's computer systems up to date...

this is another boondogle....anti ballistic missile's system utter failure....

[TomInTib]

2. "Self Healing Minefield" - Who comes up with this crap?

How about "Self Healing Minefield Victims"?

And I suppose it's becoming difficult to find live Iraqis to demonstrate body language.

The Brain Interface Program sounds interesting, as well.

Our tax dollars at work.

edited because I cannot spell

[CrazyOrangeCat]

3. The mechanical elephant might be kinda fun.

Sorry.

:spank:

[TomInTib]

7. Yeah? You can take it home, but...

you'll have to clean up after it.

Got a pair of anti-static boots?

[CrazyOrangeCat]

8. I'm sure there's some in THIS attic.

;)

[edbermac]

4. Why not shrink people like in Fantastic Voyage?

[MadMaddie]

11. ha..ha....I loved that movie...

:rofl:

[MADem]

5. I remember some years back, they were researching robo-insects

http://www.popularmechanics.com/science/robotics/1282381.html?page=1&c=y

Ron Fearing has the future of warfare at the tip of his finger. It isn’t pressing on the trigger of a laser death ray or button of a doomsday device. It’s holding a stubby-winged mechanical bug. “Flies are one of the most stable and maneuverable of all flying animals,” says the University of California at Berkeley biologist. “They are the jet fighters of the animal world.” The Pentagon shares this opinion and wants to turn these Bizzaro World duplicates of houseflies into real jet fighters.
The Berkeley team is one of about a dozen groups of engineers and biologists who are exploring the final frontier of flight: micro air vehicles (MAVs). By merging the aerodynamics of insects with GPS navigation and molecular electronics, they hope to initially create an arsenal of tiny reconnaissance tools. When perfected, Fearing’s stainless steel and Mylar robot flies will be able to flap their way into the most secret places on Earth—the bunkers where Saddam Hussein plans his genocidal campaigns, and where Chinese spymasters plot their raids on America’s nuclear weapons laboratories..

[GreatCaesarsGhost]

19. dan brown's "Deception Point"

used a microbot - a remote controlled flying "insect" - to do various jobs including taking pictures of

a senator getting it on with an aide, assassination, and audio surveillance.

in the author's note at the beginning he said "all technologies described in this book exist."

[pocket]

6. DARPA invented the intarweb

!!1!

[sui generis]

9. Hey remember Darpa's "gay" bomb?

That was a real winner too - throw a chemical bomb that would turn soldiers gay and make them throw down their guns and pick up their lipstick and poodle skirts.

Some days you just gotta say D'oh!

Hey, let's have a DARPA contest.

Here's my entry: meth bombs. They explode on the ground, everyone runs around and cleans the hell out of everything and talks real fast then passes out and sleeps whereever they fall for three days. Our soldiers just walk in and take over.

Boobie bombs. Self-explanatory.

Infiltrate the water supply with mega estrogen. All the men grow boobs and start having their period. :rofl: I'm stuck, can't get the image out of my mind. Help.

[TomInTib]

10. Have you sought professional help?

I love the "Meth Bombs"

Nothing like occupying a spotless country, I always say.

[peacebird]

12. OMG - I had totally forgotten about the GAY bomb....

it was supposed to demoralize al Qaeda by getting the men all hot for each other.... right?

Make them experience uncontrollable lust, good grief these repukes are all totally obsessed with gay sex. Kinda makes you wonder, eh?

[KyndCulture]

13. The REAL operation Swarmer

[Matariki]

14. heh - love this line:

"A similar scheme aimed at manipulating wasps failed when they flew off to feed and mate."

mad scientist slapstick. the pentagon should have a reality tv show.

[Ripley]

16. I KNOW!!

Um, They are freaking INSECTS!! They fly around looking for FOOD AND MATES!! They don't have BRAINS!!!

Must be doing good drugs over there.

[Ripley]

15. And Who Knew they did THIS SHIT?

WWII: Attach a bomb to a cat and drop it from a dive-bomber on to Nazi ships. The cat, hating water, will "wrangle" itself on to enemy ship's deck. In tests cats became unconscious in mid-air

1. Not all cats hate water. Some are good swimmers in Greece (hang around fishing boats).
2. The fall alone would kill the critter.
3. WTF do they need to use a live animal? Why not AIM?

[suffragette]

17. Sounds like someone was watching "Fifth Element"

Remember the remote-controlled cockroach equipped with a camera?

[drm604]

20. Cockroaches with cameras.

I recall reading something about a lab that was doing experiments with remote controlled cockroaches with cameras mounted on them. One of the possible uses they gave was looking inside collapsed buildings for survivors after earthquakes. I don't remember where I heard it but maybe I'll do some Googling later on (I'm busy at the moment) and post a link if I find it. Of course, none of that validates some of the silly stuff that DARPA is trying to do!

[suffragette]

21. Yep, and that silly stuff is funded

Who knows what actually gets implemented from them. I imagine we don't even hear about those projects. In the meantime, imagine that money being spent to study a way to implement Universal Health Care or to develop new transportation and energy resources.

Nope, we get the new "bugged" bugs and the older gait surveillance. http://www.usatoday.com/tech/news/2003-05-20-gait-id_x.htm

Nice priorities.

[drm604]

22. I found the story.

I have no idea how credible it is, but it is identified as being an AP story. The article is on sites all over the web, but this site has a good picture with it: http://www.intercorr.com/roach.htm

[THUNDER HANDS]

18. what's next, snails with friggin' bazooka's on their shells?