The Elephan in the Bedroom

[katty]

more at: http://men.style.com/gq/features/full?id=content_4268

THE ELEPHANT IN THE BEDROOM
Ten (and a half) reasons why Republicans—yes, Republicans—are the best party in bed By Anonymous

Yeah, yeah, yeah, you’d think Democrats would be better in the sack, because they’re usually, well…better human beings in general. Plus, they’re so em-oh-tional and sen-sitive and they genuinely care about your day. And how you feel. And how you felt yesterday. “Is there anything you need?” they whimper. Oh, shutthefuckup! This is sex we’re talking about! After numerous years of intensive research on both sides of the aisle—and sometimes in the aisle—I am here to report that Republican men (except the closet cases) are infinitely better to have sex with. Here’s why.

1. NO CONSCIENCE!
A Republican man will never whine in the middle of the night—let alone in the middle of screwing you—about the girlfriend/wife/whatever he is “devastating” by sleeping with you. He just does it. It’s all about him—he needs to be the best you ever had, and that can be a good thing if your getting off is contingent on his. He doesn’t even stay for breakfast. (Though if you do make him breakfast, he is eternally grateful and will go down on you for another several hours.) One word: pancakes!

2. NO TEARS!
A Republican man will never, ever cry. Not on election night (no matter what happens). Not when you’re breaking up with him (what, you think he cared?). Not even when he’s having “a problem I’ve never had before, really, I’m not kidding, I swear.”

3. A SENSE OF PERSPECTIVE
I’ve dated Democrats whose nights have been ruined (forever!) due to some stupid-ass comment by Bill Frist on Hardball. I’ve watched them go all mopey, argue with the TV…and then their little weenies disappear. Not so with GOPers. Republicans, particularly when naked, do not want to sit around and talk about Social Security privatization. Or Iraq, for chrissake. Or why (oh, boo hoo, get over it!) Kerry lost. They don’t even want to sit around naked and talk about George W. Bush. They just want you to sit on them.

[datadiva]

1. Well, now thats just wrong! n/t

[maxsolomon]

2. gee, thanks for posting this.

are you sure it doesn't belong on another board, or are you :popcorn:?

[katty]

6. nope relax--just for fun-happen to see it

[helderheid]

3. This is hilarious! I'm sorry if that makes me a bad dem but I'm giggling!

[OPERATIONMINDCRIME]

4. Actually That Was Pretty Funny. I Got A Kick Out Of It. I Bet We Can

make one as a rebuttal though that's even funnier :)

[MADem]

5. Well, I asked a woman who recently dumped a GOP dope about this

and who briefly dated another GOP type previous to that (politics broke them up)...and she told me that it's probably true, much of it, but all of those pluses are mitigated by the simple truth that Republicans are hung like miniature mosquitoes....

So, if item number SIX (6. SIZE
It is absolutely, positively, 100 percent true that Republicans have bigger dicks. Just ask Lynne Cheney. (Dick is the Liam Neeson of Washington!) ) is a total lie, how can one possibly believe the rest of the claims????

I always thought that picture of "Big Dick" was a bunched up diaper, myself!! Or a colostomy bag!

[katty]

7. writer is OBVIOUSLY having a bit of fun

[MADem]

8. Oh yeah, absolutely--see item 10.5 for the big finish! n/t

[katty]

9. ha!