Update on Sheetrock Jesus

[quaoar]

Sheetrock Jesus brings miracles to South Alabama, nears record set by Chicago's Our Lady of the Underpass.

http://www.al.com/news/mobileregister/index.ssf?/base/news/1144660808178570.xml&coll=3

Church says Jesus image continues to attract, heal

By ANDY NETZEL
Staff Reporter

The congregation on Sunday thanked the Lord for a miracle granted two days before, prayed that a Godly intervention would stop a case of colon cancer and welcomed a new member to the Triumph Learning and Worship Center for Life.

It sounds like a busy Sabbath, but that's the way things have been going at this small Saraland congregation ever since members noticed a 2-foot tall buckled piece of drywall they say resembles Jesus Christ on the cross.

"I don't care if it's a piece of dried Sheetrock," Pastor Ella Roberts said from the pulpit. "I don't care if it's a piece of toast or a potato chip! I care about God! If He can die on a cross and rise in three days, who are we to question His actions?"

< snip >

Since a March 21 article in the Press-Register made the image public, more than 1,000 visitors have stopped by, the church has expanded its hours and more seats have been added to accommodate the swelling congregation. Seven people have become members, and the congregation now regularly has visitors from other churches.

< sbip >

Roberts said the 150 or so church members have never been more unified. There's a feeling of love that continues to inspire many folks who walk in the door, she said.

[grytpype]

1. And these people demand to be taken seriously.

They are worshipping this:



a f-ed up piece of drywall, and they demand that we don't laugh.

Well...


:rofl:
:rofl:
:rofl:
:rofl:
:rofl:
:rofl:

[beam me up scottie]

4. In all fairness,

they aren't worshipping the sheetrock.

[Kutjara]

9. No, because THAT would be silly (n/t)

[valerief]

17. My tea just went up my nose. n/t

[Emit]

80. LOL. n/t

[SammyWinstonJack]

107. !

:rofl:

[BlueEyedSon]

10. Sure they are

[beam me up scottie]

16. Uh, no they're not.

No more than the catholics I grew up with worshipped Mary in a bathtub.

[PSPS]

Hey! I resemble that remark!

I grew up catholic. I used to have a girlfriend named Mary. And I worshiped her in the bathtub on occasions too numerous to count!

[beam me up scottie]

36. ROFLMAO!!!

:rofl:

Actually, I was thinking more along the lines of this:



But yours works too!

[Kutjara]

39. A thing of beauty is a joy forever

And that picture is truly beautiful. I stand in awe of the mind that created it. It's a powerful reminder of why we need to lock our doors at night.

[beam me up scottie]

41. That?

They're all over the place in rural northern Vermont and Canada.

Kind of hokey, but harmless.

[Kutjara]

46. Note to self:

Avoid rural northern Vermont and Canada. Coming from a family of Roman Catholic icon-hoarders, I have a visceral fear of such displays. Reminds me too much of the paintings of Jesus and the Saints with the eyes that followed you that adorned my childhood bedroom walls. <shiver>

[beam me up scottie]

52. Yikes!

I remember those.

All very baffling to an atheist kid.

And probably to catholic ones too.

[Kutjara]

73. Had religion pile ceiling-high on my head

Was sent to various loony religious schools (including one run by BDSM Jesuits - bad bad bad), grew up in a house with more baroque religious iconography than an Italian Cathedral.

Made me into the world's most resolute athiest. My view: even if there is a God, I wouldn't cross the street to piss on him is he was on fire.

[beam me up scottie]

91. Wow, another new atheist!

Yay!

Somebody from the club must have been out knocking on doors and handing out subversive literature.

Welcome to DU! :toast:

[patrice]

76. Primitive.

I like it.

[beam me up scottie]

88. BWAHAHAHA !!!

Perfect!

[patrice]

90. Perfect what?

I've actually seen those things scattered along the northern edges of the Great Lakes and up into Canada.

Have you ever seen one before?

[beam me up scottie]

97. Yes, I have.

I grew up in northern Vermont, right on the QUebec border, and they are EVERYWHERE.
Or they were, most of the kids I grew up with don't have them in their yards.

I loved your descriptive term "primitive".

[patrice]

105. Oh.

I had a friend who found one once somewhere. It was very different, not painted much at all, just kind of grey stone, but it had the most unusual eyes. Very Byzantine looking face and eyes. It might have been a folk artist. I've never seen another like it. That was a long time ago too.

[patrice]

45. Did you see proud2Blib's pictures of the Immigration rally today in KC?

They had Our Lady of Guadelupe on the hoods of their cars. Who's gonn' so no to Our Lady?

It's a representation of the wife of Our Father.

I give up.

It's A cultural thing . . . .

[beam me up scottie]

53. No!

ROFLMAO!!!

[patrice]

74. Have you ever been around "low rider" car communities.

I've seen them in Tulsa and Denver. Very proud. Beautiful.

The Church is Real to many of them.

[beam me up scottie]

98. No.

I can yuck it up with the best of them when it comes to poking fun at the holier than thou fundies, but I'm not really comfortable belittling faith in general.

That kind of devotion is a little unnerving, though.

[patrice]

104. I can't imagine getting all that excited about some sagging sheetrock,

no matter what it looks like.

It is good if they become better friends because of it, because they all talk openly about the sagging sheetrock/sign amongst themselves and listen to different points of view, but each retain his/her right to decide what is meaningful for themselves. Just as I would when I say "Fuck -whatever".

[beam me up scottie]

106. You know,

I think you nailed it when you said it was a different culture.

I don't view catholics, even devout ones, the way I view, say, southern baptists.

None of my friends EVER tried to convert me, or pass judgment on me.
We never even talked about religion.

When I moved away from home and met the enemy, ie: fundies, I was in shock and have felt threatened by them ever since.

I have a lot of problems with the Pope, the Vatican and Church policies, but I haven't met any catholics who didn't feel the same way I do.

As a matter of fact, the catholics I grew up with made fun of the Pope and Mary of the Bathtub all of the time.

[patrice]

111. Remember The Name of the Rose?

Laughing is not heretical. It's good for us and no more an impediment to the Truth than red robes and a fussy attitude about rules.

The Catholic church I was raised in all of the way from first grade to eleventh (I graduated from a public high school), never discouraged our questions. It was considered a component of your maturity as a Christian to figure out what Christianity means for yourself. We were told to look for answers and choose accordingly, because our souls were our own responsibilities. Questioning and looking for answers was considered a mark of maturity.

I still love the Mass. But the Church is responsible for Bush's War and the Infantilization of Women. Though I agree on a lot of theological and ethical issues, I'm pretty mad at them for the regression they've displayed since John XXIII died.

I'm a member of the church with no walls now.

[beam me up scottie]

119. It's weird,

none of my girlfriends go to Mass at all now.
They had their kids baptized but that's about the extent of their relationship with the church.

I think growing up when they did as liberated young women, made them immune to a lot of the guilt that their mothers willingly shouldered.

They weren't having any of it.

[immoderate]

112. I wonder if Jesus can heal the wall.

Needs some fixin'. :shrug:Can they recommend a carpenter?

--IMM

[patrice]

115. It's gonna' take a Real Handy-Man.

Not many of those left these days.

[BlueEyedSon]

67. They are idolators, pure and simlple

and idiots

[patrice]

29. Thank you for that.

I'm no great lover of Religion, but let's not mis-characterize things for our own advantage (like those whom we struggle against do all of the time).

[beam me up scottie]

37. Uh, please don't tell the other atheists.

They'll make fun of me.

:D

[patrice]

42. I appreciate honesty.

It's a useful contribution in the middle of so much Incompetence and Ir-responsibility.

[beam me up scottie]

44. It's easy for people to forget

how it feels to be misrepresented.

[patrice]

47. Some people think I think I'm better than they are, because of my vocabu-

lary.

They are wrong. I just like words.

[beam me up scottie]

60. Anti-intellectualism.

We've been discussing how that appears to be making somewhat of a comeback in this country.

We haven't been able to agree on the cause, though.

Is it a symptom or the problem?

[patrice]

68. I've know it for a long time.

But I lived in a big Catholic family, so we were expected to make the family proud. I have many brothers and sisters; all pretty much like me, but different temperaments. All excellers of one type or another.

[beam me up scottie]

70. I always wondered what it would be like to have a sister.

Would she have been competition or an ally?

My brothers are very different from me, and each other, actually.

It sounds like your parents raised individuals, too.

[patrice]

81. We're pretty solid.

I'm closer to the ones nearer my age, though none of us is a stranger to the others. You get pretty assertive when you're raised in a group like that, so we're kind of different from each other too.

Mom and Dad listened to Opera and some popular Jazz; they always were kind of midwestern Bohemians, though their families were German and Irish immigrants. My Dad helped start his Union, because he usually was foreman on their jobs. All of us had music lessons and we still have lots of active music in our family. That keeps the sisters kind of connected too, at certain times of the year.

[beam me up scottie]

94. Wow.

Sounds like something out of the movies.

My mom was an immigrant and my father's parents were also.

[patrice]

99. Re "Americans" - All of us are travelers.

Here in the "U.S." . . . From the start, I mean.

Everyone except the Anasazi (sp?) and maybe the Hopewell?

I'm very proud of my Irish and German heritage.

The Irish are a race of Poets.

[beam me up scottie]

102. I'm German.

On both sides.

Well, my mom was born in Transylvania but she was a German citizen when she moved here.

I'm also proud of my heritage and I despise the morons who expect everyone to blend in when they come here.
Overzealous nationalism is just as bad as fundamentalism.

[patrice]

108. I'm proud of Germany too.

Their country is Wonderful to visit!!!

I AM proud of my German blood too. There is a rich German cultural heritage too.

I have thought long and hard about what happened in WWI. I don't really know personally what "forgiveness" means in that context. It isn't mine to say. I can understand what happened there though and how they came under the influence of a psychotically Paranoid individual. No one should forget that happened. And HOW and Genocides come about in General.

[beam me up scottie]

109. My mother

was a child refugee during WWII.
She lost two of her brothers in the war, two others were trapped behind the Iron Curtain until 1990.
I will never forget the stories my mother told me.
She witnessed the worst depravity of men on all sides of the conflict, including the American soldiers who regularly raped women in the refugee camps.

War is not like a spaghetti western, all white hats and black hats.

[patrice]

113. Yeah, I've been reading Howard Zinn.

Nothing much is as "they" say it is.

War in particular! I watched Lord of the Rings Again recently and it reminded me of one of the things Tolkein was telling us (also in The Silmarilion): Evil is "defeated" in the suicidal struggle between opposed forces fighting to possess its Absolute Power.

[beam me up scottie]

118. I think I'm going to go back and

re-read a lot of the books I enjoyed so much so many years ago.
I'm sure I will get more out of them now, especially the science fiction authors my dad introduced me to when I was still a kid.

[frylock]

43. ha ha..

[beam me up scottie]

61. I can hear his voice now!

:D

[Kutjara]

7. Jesus?

It looks more like an ultrasound scan of someones penis and testicles. Or one of those diagrams of the urinary system.

[JuniperLea]

18. Hehe!

I bet you're good at Rorschach:)


http://skepdic.com/inkblot.html

[smirkymonkey]

27. LOL! I was thinking something along the same lines.

Ovaries and a uterus??

[patrice]

49. Right!

It's a message for Wymyn.

[GoneOffShore]

54. I was going toward Fallopian tubes

and uterus.

I wanted to be an ob-gyn but I didn't have the Latin, so I became a miner instead.

[Monk06]

124. penis and testicles?

I see a uterus, fallopian tubes and ovaries. But that's just me.

[TexasLawyer]

13. That's just as I'd pictured Him

except somewhat more sheet-rocky.

[Berserker]

66. OMG it's Ah-nold

to me it looks like a body builders pose.

[patrice]

83. Sagging Ahnold.

[sakabatou]

Uh... what about the commandment about idols...

I hear that that commandment has yet to be observed in right-wing/fundie churches...

[beam me up scottie]

2. Sheetrock Jesus?

:popcorn:

[patrice]

50. That's make a good band-name.

For a garage band.

[Guaranteed]

56. God damn, it would.

I gotta write that down. :P

[beam me up scottie]

57. You know,

it would.

I think I'll send it to Dave Barry.

[theHandpuppet]

72. I'm still waiting for SNAP-ON Jesus

'Cuase I want to be a tool of the Lord!

[patrice]

93. Me too.

Part of making him what I know of as "real".

Make him get down from that stupid cross.

[beam me up scottie]

100. I'm having visions of pez Jesus.

Please tell me there isn't one.

[kath]

116. Well, I was VERY fond of Christ-on-a-Trailer-Hitch

back during the Schiavo Circus.

Anybody have a picture of Him? Puh-leeze??

[beam me up scottie]

120. You got it:

[kath]

121. wow, thanks!! Cracks me up every time!

(and I can use every laugh I can get)

[quaoar]

122. Here's Our Lady of the Underpass

[Kutjara]

3. It must be the Endtimes

How else can you explain lunacy like this? We'll all be baying at the moon and clawing out our own eyes by the end of the week.

In other news, I've just noticed that, from certain angles, my ass looks exactly like the Virgin Mary. Fundies are invited to get in touch if they want to kiss it.

[JuniperLea]

5. The mind is a powerful thing!

I have no doubt some people are being healed. I have every doubt that a Deity would chose to show up in sheetrock, concrete stains, potato chips, tortillas, toast, or any other manner of matter.

Belief in anything is a powerful force.

[BlueEyedSon]

12. you forgot "grilled cheese"

[JuniperLea]

20. Darn!

Biscuits too...


Although I once had a bedroom door that had cool woodgrain patterns that looked like the devil... we got to be good friends, me and Lucifer. He let me call him Lu.

[Kutjara]

26. What I loved about the grilled cheese sandwich...

...was that it had a bite taken out of it. I can just imagine the guy who made it saying, "Well I'll be...looky there! It's the face of our Virgin Mother right there in that grilled cheese sandwich. It must be some kinda sign from the Lord Almighty about the Endtimes or something. Hmmm. It's a fine looking sandwich though." <chomp>

[verse18]

35. That's funny,....

'cause it's true.:)

[kath]

117. Was that the one that was for sale on Ebay?

[valerief]

22. Yeah, just look at a crowd of Bush supporters and you know it's true. n/t

[patrice]

51. Now if "we" could just learn how to "see Him" in Others - All Others.

the Animals and Trees too.

[Gabi Hayes]

6. all it takes is a little bit of spray Kilz

buh bye

[realisticphish]

8. Jesus (no pun intended)

Look, I'm Christian, but that's just plain stupid.

It doesn't even look like Jesus (neither the real one, nor our bastardized, western, blue eyed version)

[JuniperLea]

21. Danged ol' graven images anyway! n/t

[Kutjara]

28. Yeah...

...have these bare-knuckle boxers forgotten that, since the Bible forbids such images, 'God' is unlikely to go around creating them so credulous slackwits can worship them?

[patrice]

55. Yeah . . . What was that First Commandment?

[patrice]

96. Have you seen this?

http://www.nature.com/news/2006/060403/full/060403-7.html

[realisticphish]

103. of course

(though I first saw it in a times article)
where did you think I got my sig picture :D
It's been discussed a LOT on the biology/evolutionary blogs i read

[xchrom]

11. ...

:eyes:

[JuniperLea]

14. Something so outrageous, well how 'bout Adam and Eve

Creepy Jackalope Eyes


An elaborate tale
So convincingly real
Things can seem so amazing
’til you get up close
And see they’re no big deal
Like the stars in the sky
Or the one on the stage
Just a big ball of gas
And a regular guy
Fresh out of minimum wage

In a jackalope space
On a jackalope high
I’m staring you down
Creepy jackalope eye

Many things in this life
Are not what they appear
Yeah I look like a hare
But if you stop and you stare
I’m related to a deer

I got a jackalope face
I’m a jackalope guy
And I’m staring you down
Creepy jackalope eye

Is it so hard to imagine
Is it so hard to believe
Something so outrageous
Something so far fetched
Well how ’bout adam and eve?

I know you gotta have faith
I know the need to hope
But the truth is always in place
It’s right in front of my face
The mighty jackalope
(yeah)

In a jackalope space
On a jackalope high
I’m staring you down
Creepy jackalope
And I’m staring down
Creepy jackalope
And I’m staring you down
Creepy jackalope eye
Freaky jackalope eye
Creepy jackalope eye
Creepy jackalope eye

[Kingshakabobo]

15. I had a leaky roof that caused water to get behind...............

...........the drywall paper and cause a bulge to slide down my wall. Mine looked more like a woman's breast though.

[Kutjara]

34. You fool!

Those were the Virgin Mary's tits! You had a duty to turn your house into a pilgrimmage site so that everybody could bask in the glow of the Sacred Mammaries.

You selfish, evil, bastard.

[patrice]

59. Right!

[valerief]

19. What if he's really Shiiterock Jesus? n/t

[patrice]

65. As in Bushiterock?

[NYC]

23. I think the grilled cheese sold for $20,000.

..."I don't care if it's a piece of dried Sheetrock," Pastor Ella Roberts said from the pulpit. "I don't care if it's a piece of toast or a potato chip! I care about God! If He can die on a cross and rise in three days, who are we to question His actions?"...

I wonder how much for an ice cream sundae.

[smirkymonkey]

33. No F-ing way!!

You're kidding, aren't you?

Someone actually paid $20k for an old grilled cheese sandwich with a bite taken out of it?

If this is true, we are surely at the end times. :banghead:


P.S. Hey, how much do you want for that Sundae?

[NYC]

38. A casino bought it for $28,000.

Something about bringing good luck -- or -- it was the patron saint of gambling.

‘Virgin Mary grilled cheese’ sells for $28,000
Online casino wins eBay auction for 10-year-old 'holy' snack



A woman who said her 10-year-old grilled cheese sandwich bore the image of the Virgin Mary will be getting a lot more bread after the item sold for $28,000 on eBay.

GoldenPalace.com, an online casino, confirmed that it placed the winning bid, and company executives said they were willing to spend “as much as it took” to own the 10-year-old half-sandwich with a bite out of it.

...she took a bite after making the sandwich 10 years ago and saw a face staring back at her. She put the sandwich in a clear plastic box with cotton balls and kept it on her night stand. She said the sandwich has never sprouted a spore of mold.

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/6511148/

[smirkymonkey]

58. Does no one see the irony in this?

Virgin Mary? Casino?

Idiots. :eyes:

[Kutjara]

86. Oh I don't know.

You could call the craps tables "Holy Rollers"

Or maybe I'm just virgin on the ridiculous (ba-boom!).

[patrice]

69. Rise in 3 days? - The tomb was empty. That's indeterminant at best..

Besides, "we" aren't Christian for a "reward". No quid pro quo. It's kind of a madness.

[rzemanfl]

24. The streaky window "Virgin Mary" in Clearwater was way better

than this.

[jbnow]

25. At least there is this:

150 or so church members have never been more unified. There's a feeling of love that continues to inspire many folks who walk in the door, she said

Unless they unify is some judging, hateful thing then good for them. If the reminder of the possibility of miracles makes them for loving, let it be.

If there is a God who is involved with humanity it would be a good time for him to show up...not as an image in toast or drywall. Some big, miraculous way. Especially on some broadcast speech of bush or sermon of a right winger and berate them for their lies and misleading and just tell people what is true.

Honestly if the right wing met Jesus they wouldn't like him. And if
heaven does not reject them they will reject heaven if they keep their in life attitudes. They wouldn't like the company there, all the liberals and atheists walking around heaven all happy.

[smirkymonkey]

40. Unified? You mean unified against reality?

I'm sorry, these people are really reaching. It's really kind of sad.

Can't they feel unified by a need to help the less fortunate? Unified against an unjust war? Against corporations driving people into poverty and desperation? No - instead they unify over hallucinations projected onto material objects.

[patrice]

71. Everyone is Called to the Beloved Community.

[smirkymonkey]

30. Great! Just in time for the holidays!

Hey, I have this piece of cheese that looks JUST like Jesus....




Shall we start the bidding??

[patrice]

64. We are food.

Eat Jesus.

[central scrutinizer]

31. it's upside down!!

It is really John the Baptist who was crucified upside down.

[Kutjara]

32. It does make me think that God...

...(if there is such a thing) is far more likely to be like the Norse god Loki than the Christian God. How else would you explain his/her limitless sense of mischief and irrepressible love of irony? The world is going to head in a handbasked and what does our Lord and Creator do. Imprint a 2' image of Jesus on some drywall in a dirtwater town in the middle of nowhere, then sit back and watch the local nutboxes go wild.

Got to admire the sheer audacity.

[pnwmom]

48. NOW I get it. The same people who look at sheetrock and see Jesus

are the ones who look at * and see a President.

[patrice]

62. But they don't seem to see Jesus or Our Lady in Anyone else, just*

or just in a sElect FEW, who pass their judgement, the Righteous and the Riff-Raff + Cannon Fodder.

[GoneOffShore]

63. Sneak in there with some Kilz

and a broad knife, and some spackle.

Make it disappear. They can't guard it every night. Maybe replace it with the cover of Dark Side of the Moon.

[sendero]

75. Never mind..

... that any and all images of Christian figures were pulled out of some artist's ass.

What sad, pathetic people.

[Kutjara]

79. You reminded me...

...of when the big debate about admitting women priests to the Church of England was at its height. The conservative male bigots would trot out the argument that priests had to be men because they were supposed "to represent Jesus" when saying Mass, and He had been male.

One would-be women priest (priestess? no, that's just not right) finally got sick of this and said, "Fine, so all Anglican priests should be about 5'4" tall, have long wavy hair and a beard, be of Eastern Mediterranean extraction, under 33 years old...and Jewish."

Interestingly, the Church of England now has women priests.

[Nikki Stone1]

The image looks like a DIRTY SOCK!

Can I extrapolate to all pieces of laundry?

[Nikki Stone1]

77. The image looks like a DIRTY SOCK!

Can I extrapolate to all pieces of laundry?

[Dont_Bogart_the_Pretzel]

78. I found a BIG souce of Jesus look-a-likes(?)

http://www.prattle.net/archives/cat_religious_tat.html

[Kutjara]

84. Thank you thank you thank you thank you!

I'm laughing so hard I may have an accident. It is truly wonderous to behold what some people take to be evidence of divine manifestations.

Oh dear. I'm going to have to go and have a lie-down.

Thank you again!

[patrice]

89. That is Hilarious!

Truly!

I can't stop laughing . . . .

[Dont_Bogart_the_Pretzel]

82. Here ya go!

yes I did :spray: when I saw this when I Googled "Jesus images"

[patrice]

85. Oh my eyes!!!

Arrrrggghhh!!

[Kutjara]

87. The pain!!!! Please make it stop!!! n/t

[Richard Steele]

101. Well, great! Now I have to go clean my eyes with alcohol...

...and a match.

[SammyWinstonJack]

123. Okay, something wrong there.

[cynatnite]

92. I thought this was a new type of christian rock

:eyes:

I would never have imagined that it was actually jesus on sheetrock.

:rofl:

[Kutjara]

95. You underestimate fundie literal-mindedness

If they say "sheetrock Jesus" they mean Jesus on a piece of sheetrock. No room for metaphor in their dangerously limited minds.

[Alamom]

110. See a video of these people.

http://cbs4.com/topstories/local_story_081155418.html




The elderly black man in a wheelchair with what looks to be a recent amputation, trying to reach the "miracle wall" is a real hoot. :sarcasm:


If these people believe they have had something special happen in their small church, what the hell is wrong with that? Maybe we should consider who the real faces are behind some of these stories before some of these remarks are made. Just a thought.


Small,(mostly) black congregation in a small town. Church flooded by Katrina. Probably many of their homes, too.
Who are they hurting ?

[Atman]

114. I don't care if it rains or freezes, just so I got my sheetrock Jesus.

Or this post...

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_mesg&forum=364&topic_id=899066&mesg_id=899066