Ergo, I cannot buy a delicious home in San Francisco. Ergo, I am screwed forever
http://sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/gate/archive/2007/06/15/notes061507.DTL&nl=fixI did not get in on the ground floor of Google. I did not grab 50,000 shares of Flickr before it was bought for $8 bazillion by Yahoo, thus instantly affording me a fleet of new diamond-encrusted Aston Martins and a set of solid-gold teeth.
I do currently own a nice fistful of Apple stock which I bought at 17 (!) and which is now worth a small carload of iPhones, but in this ridiculous and demeaning and utterly depressing San Francisco housing market this equates to enough money to buy roughly 9 square feet of a former meth lab in an industrial loft in the outer Mission.
(There is some good news: I plan to release my first book sometime in late 2019, after which I will quickly make numerous millions of dollars after Oprah has me on to tell me how my soul-altering tome caused her to forsake skanky celebrity interviews in favor of yoga and cold sake and sex toys and books that aren't just painfully maudlin coming-of-age, rite-of-passage examinations of oppressed sexually abused lesbian sisters from broken raging alcoholic families from the South.)
But until that time, if I want to live in San Francisco, if I wish to have some semblance of space and hope and urban love with enough money left over for Peet's and good wine and relatively decent porn, I must do what all commoners like me must do: I gotta rent. ...