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...with his wife, singing a song about green cards. Apparently, after driving past a road crew with some Hispanic males working in it, they spent the remaining time in the car coming up with hilarious lyrics about illegal immigrants set to the tune of Feliz Navidad.
Having learned from previous bitter experience that it was pointless to try for anything like a civilized debate with my uncle (he once told me that gays had no right to marry but interracial couples could because those couples were “people”), I had no intention of calling him out for his tasteless behavior. He must have seen the look on my face, however, so he insisted on discussing his views on immigration. Sadly, like many bigots, he used this election cycle’s GOP Fear Tactic® of “illegal immigration” to mask his latent contempt for all immigrants (at least the brown ones- legal or otherwise). During the course of his tirade, ostensibly against those who enter our country illegally, he mentioned his hatred of government forms and retail products with both English and Spanish text, immigrants who took jobs from “real Americans” and how his taxes were being wasted on social programs used by immigrants.
Personally, I try never to interrupt anyone, regardless of the provocation, even if they constantly interrupt me; first, it is rude, and second, it drives home the point that his argument is probably not that convincing if he refuses to let anyone else get a word in edgewise. Despite my uncle’s constant interruptions (and his wife telling him to shut up and let me speak), I was able to explain to him that new immigrants often need some help acclimating to our society and multi-language labels and forms were a small price to pay; that most or all the “good jobs” the Hispanic immigrants (deep down, I knew that Mexicans were all he was concerned about) are taking in our particular area are lowly kitchen, janitorial and fruit-picking jobs; and that everyone at some point gets something from the government, pointing out that, as a Veteran, he received 100% free healthcare which was paid for entirely by taxes. Using his argument, I asked him if people who do not qualify for government coverage should resent their taxes going for his personal healthcare.
At this point, he slapped his hand hard on the table, mumbled something under his breath and left me alone with my aunt who apologized for his behavior. She and I talked about immigration for a little while longer until I had to leave to pick up my son from preschool. At this point, my uncle came out of his office and started to harangue me about just why he deserved his free healthcare, how he spent eight goddamned years in the navy, how he had to hold a (whatever rifle they issued naval officers at the time) in Saudi Arabia guarding against Shiites who wanted to kill him and HOW DARE I question his service to this country and just how stupid liberals like me were, etc.
I walked past him half-blocking the exit, hoping to be able to control my own temper while he was yelling at me. Unfortunately, I eventually snapped, not only calling him prejudiced but extremely selfish and that all he cared for was himself, all while we were walking to our cars.
As I later explained to my father (who runs the company for which my uncle and I work) I never even wanted to talk to my uncle in the first place, let alone have the whole thing disintegrate into an ugly shouting match at the end. Frankly, I could have said a lot more to my uncle at the time but knew it just was not worth it, since my uncle thrives on conflict.
I do not feel bad about what I said, but I am ashamed at myself for losing control. What is it with these goddamned conservative Republicans (yes, my bigot uncle is one of Bush’s 28-ers) that they cannot have any debate on any issue without turning the whole thing into a perceived attack on their personal integrity while simultaneously bringing out the worst in their opponents?
“The GOP- Bringing out the worst in people since 1854.”
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