Conservative demands

[angrycarpenter]

We have your country and we will kill it if our demands are not met. They are as follows.

Drill an oil well everywhere that liberals like.
Lock everyone up and throw away the key.
Declare bush emperor for life.
Remove all of the cash from all bank accounts and give it to us.
Declare protesters non-persons and shoot them dead.
Insure the death of anyone who is sick and cannot afford medical care.
Build walls around all ghettos.
Declare Islam a criminal activity.
Declare Christ as the sole founding father of America, burn all history books that say otherwise.
Declare all gays guilty of treason and hunt them down with the army.
Make it illegal to insult the rich.
Make it illegal to help the poor unless they are white Christians.
Make evangelical church attendance compulsory.
Put Reagan's face on all currency and name all public buildings after him.
Make it illegal to teach a lower class child anything except obedience.
Put a bounty on the head of all homeless.
Make all teens pull up their pants under penalty of conscription.
Build a wall around the entire country.
Imprison and torture Michael Moore.
Remove the name FDR from any and all historical records.
Make racial discrimination not only legal but compulsory.
Euthanize anyone with a bleeding heart.
Streamline the voting process by having only one name on the ballot.
Make it legal to shoot anyone who looks at you sideways.
All history books will be rewritten to reflect the truthiest history of America.
Pay raises for anyone who works will be forbidden.
Forming a labor union will be punished with forced hard labor.
Speaking any language but English will be punished by deportation.
The rights of the rich will be defined as "anything they want to do".
Make it legal to shoot any kid who walks on your lawn.
The blame for any problem will be placed on liberals or foreigners.
It will be required that you fear us at all times.



Give us what we want or we will take it from you and punish you for your resistance. The shredded remnants of the constitution are enclosed to prove that we are serious. You may signal you acceptance of these terms by voting for McCain this November.

[liberaltrucker]

1. Resistance is futile

NOT!

:patriot:

[otherlander]

2. They're locking them up today

They're throwing away the key
I wonder who it'll be tomorrow:
You or me?

[Jack Rabbit]

3. Hey, Republicans! You and your Duce can eat my shorts!

Liberty Leading the People by Eugène Delacroix (1830)
from Mt. Holyoke College

[Fairnessaboveall]

4. That's why they lose in 2006, and will lose in November

Americans are sick of their lies and ineptitude.