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Pacifist Patriot
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Sun Jul-13-08 04:41 PM Original message |
First wedding I will decline to officiate. I'm still reeling after the call. |
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EFerrari
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Sun Jul-13-08 04:42 PM Response to Original message |
1. So creepy. You didn't need that gig. n/t |
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Pacifist Patriot
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Sun Jul-13-08 04:44 PM Response to Reply #1 |
2. This is weird. As more time passes my body is actually starting to have a physical shaky reaction. |
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ayeshahaqqiqa
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Sun Jul-13-08 04:45 PM Response to Reply #2 |
8. shake off the bad vibes she had hanging around her |
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EFerrari
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Sun Jul-13-08 04:46 PM Response to Reply #2 |
9. I'm so sorry. And you know once you got there, it would only have gotten worse. |
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spanone
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Sun Jul-13-08 04:59 PM Response to Reply #2 |
24. it's amazing that an educated person would feel in anyway comfortable asking that question |
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DarthDem
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Sun Jul-13-08 04:44 PM Response to Original message |
3. Good Choice |
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ayeshahaqqiqa
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Sun Jul-13-08 04:44 PM Response to Original message |
4. No, I don't think you are |
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Pacifist Patriot
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Sun Jul-13-08 04:46 PM Response to Reply #4 |
10. I was surprised too because most people get my contact information from my website... |
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Catch22Dem
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Sun Jul-13-08 04:44 PM Response to Original message |
5. Bravo for you! I hope you don't find my question rude, but |
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Pacifist Patriot
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Sun Jul-13-08 04:49 PM Response to Reply #5 |
15. Let's just say it was most fitting. *grin* |
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Catch22Dem
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Sun Jul-13-08 04:53 PM Response to Reply #15 |
22. You're awesome! |
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Pacifist Patriot
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Sun Jul-13-08 04:55 PM Response to Reply #22 |
23. Cool! That'd be my second DU union. ;-) |
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cbayer
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Sun Jul-13-08 04:45 PM Response to Original message |
6. I think you are right to decline. |
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midnight
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Sun Jul-13-08 04:45 PM Response to Original message |
7. No, you are not off base! |
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Ikonoklast
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Sun Jul-13-08 04:46 PM Response to Original message |
11. Tell her 'Human' |
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krispos42
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Sun Jul-13-08 04:49 PM Response to Reply #11 |
16. That's the one |
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knitter4democracy
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Sun Jul-13-08 04:47 PM Response to Original message |
12. I don't think you are, but I can sorta understand her. |
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zanne
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Mon Jul-14-08 07:42 AM Response to Reply #12 |
78. I wanted my union with my husband to be sacred... |
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Bettie
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Mon Jul-14-08 07:59 AM Response to Reply #78 |
82. We were married by a judge at the courthouse.... |
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zanne
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Mon Jul-14-08 08:05 AM Response to Reply #82 |
83. Both our families were Catholic... |
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knitter4democracy
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Mon Jul-14-08 09:18 AM Response to Reply #82 |
88. Are we SILs? |
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knitter4democracy
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Mon Jul-14-08 09:18 AM Response to Reply #78 |
87. Good idea! |
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Pacifist Patriot
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Tue Jul-15-08 06:08 AM Response to Reply #87 |
94. Easily 1/3 of weddings I officiate have 10 people or fewer. One of the things... |
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zanne
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Tue Jul-15-08 08:07 AM Response to Reply #94 |
95. And, for women who don't enjoy being the center of attention... |
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knitter4democracy
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Tue Jul-15-08 08:35 AM Response to Reply #94 |
96. Those sound perfect. |
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grasswire
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Sun Jul-13-08 04:48 PM Response to Original message |
13. the minister in my family got a call... |
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MiniMe
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Sun Jul-13-08 05:49 PM Response to Reply #13 |
40. I would tell her that i would officiate, but I would not backdate papers |
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Pacifist Patriot
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Sun Jul-13-08 06:26 PM Response to Reply #40 |
46. My contract explicitly states that I cannot legally perform a valid marriage ceremony... |
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grasswire
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Sun Jul-13-08 07:36 PM Response to Reply #46 |
55. yep -- this was a next-day call |
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yardwork
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Sun Jul-13-08 10:52 PM Response to Reply #13 |
62. I hope they went forward with their wedding. It's exactly what gay people do all over the country. |
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Pacifist Patriot
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Mon Jul-14-08 05:48 AM Response to Reply #62 |
75. I've performed a number of symbolic commitment ceremonies for heterosexual couples... |
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LeftyMom
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Sun Jul-13-08 04:48 PM Response to Original message |
14. Wow. |
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morgan2
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Sun Jul-13-08 04:50 PM Response to Original message |
17. If you had some racist relatives |
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Pacifist Patriot
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Sun Jul-13-08 04:50 PM Response to Reply #17 |
18. I do have racist relatives. They didn't come to my wedding. |
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onethatcares
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Sun Jul-13-08 05:26 PM Response to Reply #18 |
33. I had racist relatives and guess what? |
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XOKCowboy
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Sun Jul-13-08 06:08 PM Response to Reply #18 |
42. PP a question... |
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Pacifist Patriot
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Sun Jul-13-08 06:21 PM Response to Reply #42 |
45. Indeed I do. My grandparents were racist and my parents are most decidedly not. |
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XOKCowboy
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Sun Jul-13-08 06:30 PM Response to Reply #45 |
47. OOoops! |
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EFerrari
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Sun Jul-13-08 04:51 PM Response to Reply #17 |
20. If I had racist relatives, they wouldn't ruin my wedding by being invited. n/t |
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deadmessengers
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Sun Jul-13-08 05:48 PM Response to Reply #17 |
39. My wife and I had that problem |
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barbtries
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Mon Jul-14-08 05:36 AM Response to Reply #17 |
72. my racist relatives |
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TheCowsCameHome
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Sun Jul-13-08 04:50 PM Response to Original message |
19. Maybe you can negotiate a settlement in their divorce instead |
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rzemanfl
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Sun Jul-13-08 05:19 PM Response to Reply #19 |
32. I handled the divorces of several people whose weddings I had |
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Warpy
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Sun Jul-13-08 04:51 PM Response to Original message |
21. Excellent choice |
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Somawas
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Sun Jul-13-08 05:03 PM Response to Original message |
25. Yes, you are. |
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EFerrari
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Sun Jul-13-08 05:04 PM Response to Reply #25 |
26. So what would you call someone who accomodates racists? |
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Pacifist Patriot
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Sun Jul-13-08 05:08 PM Response to Reply #26 |
29. That's where I am coming from. |
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EFerrari
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Sun Jul-13-08 06:12 PM Response to Reply #29 |
44. It wouldn't be good for them, in the first place. |
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Oeditpus Rex
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Sun Jul-13-08 06:38 PM Response to Reply #26 |
51. Enablers |
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Donald Ian Rankin
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Sun Jul-13-08 06:57 PM Response to Reply #26 |
53. Unfortunate. |
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EFerrari
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Mon Jul-14-08 02:20 PM Response to Reply #53 |
92. I can't speak for anyone else but I've had to negotiate a situation |
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Gormy Cuss
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Sun Jul-13-08 08:34 PM Response to Reply #26 |
58. I'd call that person naive, insecure,immature, etc. |
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Somawas
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Mon Jul-14-08 09:31 PM Response to Reply #26 |
93. Pragmatic. |
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yardwork
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Sun Jul-13-08 10:56 PM Response to Reply #25 |
63. I disagree. I think that that approach simply enables people. |
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Vinca
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Sun Jul-13-08 05:06 PM Response to Original message |
27. You should have asked if her relatives were good Christian racists. |
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mrreowwr_kittty
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Sun Jul-13-08 05:07 PM Response to Original message |
28. I wouldn't do it either. nt |
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bobbolink
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Sun Jul-13-08 05:09 PM Response to Original message |
30. And she thinks God is interested in perpetuating her biases??? |
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asdjrocky
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Sun Jul-13-08 05:12 PM Response to Original message |
31. I was a wedding professional for more than 10 years. |
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Chovexani
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Sun Jul-13-08 05:34 PM Response to Reply #31 |
36. Good for you. |
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Pacifist Patriot
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Sun Jul-13-08 05:38 PM Response to Reply #31 |
37. Wow, just wow. |
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asdjrocky
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Sun Jul-13-08 05:53 PM Response to Reply #37 |
41. Yeah, and here I am, in blue Ca. |
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Mopar151
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Sun Jul-13-08 11:21 PM Response to Reply #31 |
66. D'oh! |
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asdjrocky
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Mon Jul-14-08 07:42 AM Response to Reply #66 |
79. No kidding.... |
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TheCowsCameHome
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Sun Jul-13-08 05:29 PM Response to Original message |
34. White pointy hoods don't go well with traditional wedding attire, anyway. |
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TechBear_Seattle
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Sun Jul-13-08 05:32 PM Response to Original message |
35. I wouldn't have done it |
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XOKCowboy
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Sun Jul-13-08 05:42 PM Response to Original message |
38. OK I can understand a bride not wanting her racist father ruining her wedding.... |
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EFerrari
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Sun Jul-13-08 06:10 PM Response to Reply #38 |
43. So, you know a racist is funding your wedding and you do what? |
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Mutley
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Sun Jul-13-08 06:39 PM Response to Reply #38 |
52. To each his/her own |
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Mutley
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Sun Jul-13-08 06:30 PM Response to Original message |
48. I most certainly would not make accomodations to those members of my family. |
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BlooInBloo
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Sun Jul-13-08 06:33 PM Response to Original message |
49. Suprised white person #4657435236475.... |
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Number23
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Mon Jul-14-08 05:52 AM Response to Reply #49 |
76. ha! |
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FourScore
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Sun Jul-13-08 06:35 PM Response to Original message |
50. It is shocking when you run into such blatant racism. |
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latebloomer
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Sun Jul-13-08 07:04 PM Response to Original message |
54. Even Jenna Bush |
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Edweird
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Sun Jul-13-08 08:20 PM Response to Original message |
56. Principles are important. |
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Starbucks Anarchist
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Sun Jul-13-08 08:27 PM Response to Original message |
57. You should have told them about the gay wedding you officiated. |
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Pacifist Patriot
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Sun Jul-13-08 08:39 PM Response to Reply #57 |
59. That would be probably okay with them.... |
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LeftyMom
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Sun Jul-13-08 11:22 PM Response to Reply #59 |
67. But their tattoos were showing! |
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Pacifist Patriot
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Mon Jul-14-08 05:46 AM Response to Reply #67 |
74. LOL! I'd forgotten that. |
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Catherine Vincent
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Sun Jul-13-08 09:49 PM Response to Original message |
60. Good for you! |
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rebel with a cause
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Sun Jul-13-08 10:46 PM Response to Original message |
61. My father was a very strict Baptist minister |
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yardwork
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Sun Jul-13-08 11:01 PM Response to Reply #61 |
64. That's an interesting story! What was shocking about their appearances? |
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rebel with a cause
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Mon Jul-14-08 12:26 AM Response to Reply #64 |
68. This was in the mid sixties and in a small town. |
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yardwork
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Mon Jul-14-08 10:52 AM Response to Reply #68 |
91. I can see why it was upsetting to your family. Would have been to me, too. |
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OmahaBlueDog
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Sun Jul-13-08 11:03 PM Response to Original message |
65. Actually, something happened like this in my family, but it ended well |
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fortyfeetunder
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Mon Jul-14-08 01:46 AM Response to Original message |
69. I recalled one wedding |
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Missy Vixen
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Mon Jul-14-08 01:56 AM Response to Original message |
70. PP, you're doing the right thing |
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barbtries
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Mon Jul-14-08 05:32 AM Response to Original message |
71. i think you're exactly right |
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ms liberty
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Mon Jul-14-08 05:45 AM Response to Original message |
73. Not at all. I'd make my bigoted relatives squirm or uninvite them. n/t |
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RedShoes
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Mon Jul-14-08 07:37 AM Response to Original message |
77. This is the FIRST* wedding you've declined to officiate, but |
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Pacifist Patriot
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Mon Jul-14-08 07:49 AM Response to Reply #77 |
81. My gender is more obvious than my race. I'll explain. |
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Blue_Tires
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Mon Jul-14-08 07:47 AM Response to Original message |
80. wow....was she related to Jesse Helms? |
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ThomCat
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Mon Jul-14-08 08:15 AM Response to Original message |
84. Wow. Good for you! |
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BlueIris
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Mon Jul-14-08 09:08 AM Response to Original message |
85. Holy shit. |
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mopinko
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Mon Jul-14-08 09:11 AM Response to Original message |
86. brides are nuts. |
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The Backlash Cometh
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Mon Jul-14-08 09:27 AM Response to Original message |
89. See. Twenty years later, nothing has changed. |
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Beacool
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Mon Jul-14-08 10:04 AM Response to Original message |
90. That's a shame!!! |
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Mad_Dem_X
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Tue Jul-15-08 08:55 AM Response to Original message |
97. No, you are not off base. |
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