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Edited on Mon Mar-12-07 08:07 PM by The Straight Story
No, this has nothing to do with DU :)
I spent the last 7 hours outside with my daughter so she could enjoy the weather. We built fires (one out front, big one out back), walked the dog, cooked hot dogs, etc.
The mail came after we were out there for an hour. And there was also a small bag hanging on my mail box with stuff in it.
And those two things prompted this OP. Compare the two:
I got some 'junkmail' (best word I could find for it...) from a church. I am a Christian myself and on some mailing lists, so I do get things like this from time to time.
The one in the mail: (this is insane IMHO)
So I open up the envelope. Inside I find what looks like a printed out place mat. Got my interest already. Then I see:
"Please do not open these prophecies (A sealed piece of paper inside the envelope I found) until after you have placed your prayer page and prayer handkerchief back in the mail before sunset tomorrow or the next day. God will help you do this."
IMPORTANT (their caps, not mine): Only break open this sealed prophecy after you have put this church prayer and handkerchief back in the mail to this 56 year old church. IF you are not going to return the Bible handkerchief then this sacred prophecy must be destroyed unopened and unread...yadda yadda yadda".
Like I care. So of course I opened this prophecy and read it.
No, it is not about war with Iran, end of the world, or anything like that. It was basically a note telling me God wanted me, I could tap into his might power, and that I may feel the power growing in me as I read this.
Elsewhere, on another page of the letter, there were testimonials like:
"I wrote you and you sent me a handkerchief because my son was in jail, and he was going to court and I took the handkerchief to court and through god's power and your prayers, God made a way for my son to come back home with me."
"I put the handkerchief in the bible...then sent it back to you. I received a check for $3500..Another one for $2500!"
Uhhhh - yeah. WTF is up with that crap??
The one hanging on the mail box
From a local community church. Had 4 things in it.
One was a folded up advert about their church, their ministry to help and feed the poor, and some stuff about their kids' program. Really pretty well done and professional.
Second Item: A generic bible tract about Jesus.
Third Item: (This is the cool one to me) - A folded blue paper about daylight savings time change coming up - and it included the 4th item, a 9 volt energizer battery with a reminder to change out your smoke detectors.
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So I here I am with two things from two different churches. One sent me a paper handkerchief and told me to send it back to get a blessing and secret prophecy.
The other one outlined how they feed the local poor in this area (disclaimer, I know of this church as it is a 1/2 mile from my house and they do help out people here quite a bit, even if not a member), have programs for kids, and gave me a free battery for my smoke detector.
SHAME on those F'ing charlatans who send out this JUNK mail (which it's members paid for....).
Next fall I will reply - even though I am moving to CA and far away from this local church I will go online and send them a bunch of 9 volt batteries to help them get the message out and to help them remind people to change out their batteries. They did not knock, they did not ask for anything (even in their brochure) - they just left a message of hope and a battery that could save a life.
Rant off.
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