Illinois Governor Blagojevich reads "'Twas the Night Before Christmas"

[underpants]

'Twas the night before $#*@!~g Christmas, when all through the $#*@!~g house

Not a creature was stirring, not even a $#*@!~g mouse;

The $#*@!~g stockings were hung by the chimney with care,

In hopes that $#*@!~g St. Nicholas soon would be there;

The children were nestled all snug in their $#*@!~g beds,

While visions of sugar-plums danced in their $#*@!~g heads;

And mamma in her 'kerchief, and I in my $#*@!~g cap,

Had just settled down for a $#*@!~g long winter's nap,

When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter,

I sprang from the $#*@!~g bed to see what was the $#*@!~g matter.

Away to the window I flew like a flash,

Tore open the shutters and threw up the $#*@!~g sash.

The moon on the breast of the new-fallen snow

Gave the lustre of mid-day to $#*@!~g objects below,

When, what to my wondering $#*@!~g eyes should appear,

But a miniature sleigh, and eight $#*@!~g tiny reindeer,

With a little old driver, so lively and quick,

I knew in a $#*@!~g moment it must be St. Nick.

More rapid than $#*@!~g eagles his coursers they came,

And he whistled, and shouted, and called them by name;

"Now, Dasher! now, Dancer! now, Prancer and $#*@!~g Vixen!

On, Comet! on Cupid! on, Donder and $#*@!~g Blitzen!

To the top of the porch! to the top of the wall!

Now dash away! dash away! $#*@!~g dash away all!"

As dry leaves that before the wild $#*@!~g hurricane fly,

When they meet with an obstacle, mount to the $#*@!~g sky,

So up to the house-top the coursers they flew,

With the sleigh full of $#*@!~g toys, and St. Nicholas too.

And then, in a twinkling, I heard on the roof

The prancing and pawing of each little $#*@!~g hoof.

As I drew in my hand, and was turning around,

Down the chimney St. Nicholas $#*@!~g came with a bound.

He was dressed all in fur, from his head to his $#*@!~g foot,

And his clothes were all tarnished with $#*@!~g ashes and soot;

A bundle of toys he had flung on his back,

And he looked like a peddler just opening his $#*@!~g pack.

His eyes -- how they twinkled! his $#*@!~g dimples how merry!

His cheeks were like roses, his nose like a $#*@!~g cherry!

His droll little mouth was drawn up like a bow,

And the beard of his chin was as white as the $#*@!~g snow;

The stump of a pipe he held tight in his $#*@!~g teeth,

And the smoke it encircled his head like a $#*@!~g wreath;

He had a broad $#*@!~g face and a little round belly,

That shook, when he laughed like a $#*@!~g bowlful of jelly.

He was $#*@!~g chubby and plump, a right jolly old elf,

And I laughed when I saw him, in spite of my $#*@!~g self;

A wink of his eye and a twist of his head,

Soon gave me to know I had nothing to dread;

He spoke not a word, but went straight to his $#*@!~g work,

And filled all the $#*@!~g stockings; then turned with a $#*@!~g jerk,

And laying his finger aside of his $#*@!~g nose,

And giving a nod, up the $#*@!~g chimney he rose;

He sprang to his $#*@!~g sleigh, to his team gave a $#*@!~g whistle,

And away they all flew like the down of a thistle.

But I heard him exclaim, ere he drove out of sight,

"Happy $#*@!~g Christmas to all, and to all a good-$#*@!~g-night."

[Subdivisions]

1. He's a $#*@!~g asshole. n/t

[dixiegrrrrl]

2. That picture reminds me of some one else....

A young Robert Blake maybe??????

???????????

[dysfunctional press]

4. if robert blake and jack lord had a love child together....it would look like blago.

nt

[terrya]

3. LOL

I have to recommend this.