Dick Morris: “I’d Pay To Suck The Polish Right Off Hannity’s Toes”

[20score]

At Fox And Friends this morning Dick Morris was making his case to replace Alan Colmes on Hannity and Colmes. The tension between Steve Doocy and Dick Morris was obvious, but what wasn’t obvious to Morris was the fact the Doocy had secretly made overtures to Sean Hannity to take second chair. According to a source close to Hannity, Steve Doocy thinks he is “just the milquetoast Sean needs.”

“Look, I’m there all the time already,” whined Dick Morris. “I can agree with Sean about anything and no one knows Sean like I do… we have a certain, chemistry.”

“Oh, come now,” said Steve Doocy. “Why wouldn’t Sean pick someone that has experience hosting a show? You’re a guest, a professional guest, like right now. Why don’t you just embrace it? He could pick anyone. Why you?"

“Well, we already agree on everything Sean believes,” said Dick. “And like I said, we have something special. Plus, look at me,” he said holding his arms open. “I make Sean look good. There is nothing I won’t do for Sean – why I’d pay to suck the polish right off his toes!

“Oops,” Dick said to a stunned silence. “I meant to say ‘I hate the Clintons.’ Let’s talk about how much I hate the Clinton’s.”




Dick Morris is receiving his first “Golden Glute” award for being an ass enough to say that Obama’s stimulus plan will “vindicate all the dreams of liberal Democrats for higher government spending.” This is in his latest article.

IMO it’s way past time to change that right wing meme and replace it with the truth. Helping the economy or people is not “dreams of higher government spending.” It’s helping people. And by extension the country. The privatization people should be challenged on our ground.

(Thanks to Suich for suggesting Morris for the Golden Glute award!)

[Tommy_Carcetti]

1. Funny. I was this close to actually thinking it was real!

I mean, it's Fox News after all.

[20score]

5. It's not too far off.

[ihavenobias]

6. Exactly.

K & R

Dick Morris is the worst. Well no, Hannity worse but still. Oh, and Glenn Beck. I think I actually might like Glenn Beck the least.

[madrchsod]

2. gross out post of the day...lol

[20score]

8. I was hoping to get points for comedy. That and the award itself.

(Just an excuse to do satire, really.)

[opihimoimoi]

3. When did Dick get anything right? He is a Pompus ass and did he say SUCK?? OMG

[emilyg]

22. He's an expert on SUCK.

Vile little man.

[Warren DeMontague]

4. Thankfully, I've already had lunch.

Thanks for the image. Ick.

[Ilsa]

7. How did Bill Clinton ever let this asshole through the door? nt

[Captain Hilts]

11. He needed to know how assholes think. They didn't vote for him. nt

[zehnkatzen]

9. Ya know, "Hannity and Douchey" has a certain appropriate ring to it. n/t

[PassingFair]

10. Harold Ford!

He's as good a douche bag as any of 'em.

[20score]

13. Thanks. I'm hoping people will nominate possibilities for satirical pieces. That and hoping to get

the award known on DU.

[Downtown Hound]

12. There's no need

I'm sure Sean would let him do it for free.

[Initech]

14. Great... now I'm going to have that image stuck in my head for the rest of today.

:puke:

[punkin87]

15. K & R! LOL!

Help you make it up the greatest ladder.
(Least yours is funny and there was effort. Those two word or one sentence OP's bug me.)

[20score]

16. Thank you!

Yeah, those two word posts bug me when they get rec's.
(Maybe it's just sour grapes but, damn....)

[punkin87]

19. Naw, you're right. It's okay to put them up, but they shouldn't get recommended like

you'd learn something.

[johnfunk]

17. I'm hoping for a miracle: "Hannity and Chomsky"

Now THAT would be must-see TV...

...or, barring that miracle, as a replacement for Billo after his next sex harassment meltdown:

[20score]

18. I'd love to see that!

[Suich]

20. Very funny, 20score!

Morris is such a toad!

:thumbsup: :thumbsup:

[20score]

21. Thanks, Suich!

[Orsino]

23. Red-blooded, two-fisted Steve Doocy knows from milquetoasts.

He eats 'em for breakfast.