New Rules for Reporters

[SoCalDem]

Effective immediately, all reporters must be barefoot...and beltless. (banning shoes might lead to the throwing of belt buckles)

Each reporter will scanned and asked to remove all projectiles from pockets ..i.e. no pocket change, lighters, money clips, keys..

Press conferences will have trays available for the storage of said "dangerous" items.

Metal or large eyeglasses will be confiscated, as well.

No writing utensils will be allowed. (too pointy/spear-like)

Female reporters with underwire brassieres may be asked to remove them.

It goes without saying, that all electronic devices will no longer be allowed (sharp edges)

Reporters with holes in their socks or women who are afraid that their keys could be an invitation to the return of "key parties", can ask for, and receive a CD of the press conference.

Edited to add:

False eyes and teeth must be removed as well.
...:sarcasm: (as if it's needed)

[dipsydoodle]

1. You missed out

removable glass eyes.

[SoCalDem]

2. Thnaks.. I added them..and teeth too..n/t

[jazzjunkysue]

3. ...wigs, artificial limbs, false teeth,

[nevergiveup]

4. I have no problem

with all reporters being required to be naked during working hours. It will give new meaning to the concept "freedom of the press".

[eleny]

5. Maybe * should get some chicken wire like they used in honky tonks

:rofl: