Grandma: Octuplets mom obsessed with having kids

[Contrary1]

"LOS ANGELES - The woman who gave birth to octuplets this week conceived all 14 of her children through in vitro fertilization, is not married and has been obsessed with having children since she was a teenager, her mother said.

Angela Suleman told The Associated Press she was not supportive when her daughter, Nadya Suleman, decided to have more embryos implanted last year.

"It can't go on any longer," she said in a phone interview Friday. "She's got six children and no husband. I was brought up the traditional way. I firmly believe in marriage. But she didn't want to get married."

<snip>

Her daughter's obsession with children caused Angela Suleman considerable stress, so she sought help from a psychologist, who told her to order her daughter out of the house.

"Maybe she wouldn't have had so many kids then, but she is a grown woman," Angela Suleman said. "I feel responsible and I didn't want to throw her out."

More: http://www.examiner.com/a-1825757~Grandma__Octuplets_mom_obsessed_with_having_kids.html

[aquart]

1. The mother saw a shrink because her daughter is insane?

Oh, goody.

[YDogg]

2. many members of NAMI are family members of those with problems

http://www.nami.org/


Just sayin'.

[elleng]

4. Of course.

Family members seek help for their family member and themselves; its natural.

[elleng]

3. Its a start.

Lay off.

[LisaL]

19. The daughter is living at home.

It has also been reported the daughter is a graduate student. So I imagine gradma at the very least participates at taking care of all those children.

[LostinVA]

42. That's really, really normal to do

[msongs]

5. so, is this woman obsessed with paying for them herself? nt

[Catshrink]

7. I'm "obsessed" with the thought of paying for her obsession.

Does this underscore the need for adequate funding of mental health services?

[grasswire]

6. and what doctor did this to these children?

This makes me ill. I suppose that family services will have to take those children, eventually. My heart breaks for the babies.

[One_Life_To_Give]

8. 6 Kids, 1 Autistic and now 8 more?

Pleanty of families struggle with 1 autistic child. Nevermind an additional 13 in the house.

[nc4bo]

9. Gramma doesn't seem so thrilled (understatement). Grampa says he's financially well off enough to

take care of his daughter and her herd (Really? In a 2 bedroom house?) :wtf:. Daughter is perfectly content on being a breeder and AI or whatever artificial means of conception allows her to breed at will without the support of a good father to these children.

Who is picking up the tab for all of this breeding?! Who is going to take care of these kids especially since the odds of them having complications throughout their young lives (due to multibirth) will probably going to be higher than average?

Sounds like typical fundamental Christian values to me.

:wtf: is REALLY going on in this household?!

Apologies - I'm a Pro-Choice Dem but this particular case has me saying :wtf: over and over again.

[supernova]

11. Agreed.

I feel similar to you about the :wtf: aspect of this case.

And the people here the past couple of days who have mentioned child hoarding have a point, I think.

This is not wanting an individual child to love and nurture (even more than one).

This smells for all the world like some kind of OCD.

And that poor grandma. I feel sorry for her and these babies who won't get the attention they deserve.

[dixiegrrrrl]

67. The article says she "gets paid for it...."

whoever and whatever that means. Article did not say.

[marshall]

10. Isn't Suleman an Arabic name?

She'd be better off keeping a low profile, before one of the fundamentalists declares a fatwa on her.

[nc4bo]

12. Is it? All info is so sketchy. Poppy had an accent but I couldn't place it

Does it really matter though?

The whacko's over at freakville have been saying how wonderful it is - such a miracle!! or so I've heard from the brave souls who go over there then report back to us on DU.

[Lifetimedem]

32. The grandfather is from Iraq

he is quoted as saying he was going back to earn some money.

I am wondering if she is a multiple wife of a Muslim man (they practice polygamy)

That could explain the source of the sperm ("husband in iraq??) and the fact she gets "paid" to have them.

No one can afford 6 kids and and college without having an income.

[LisaL]

33. What husband in Iraq? Grandma says the mother isn't married.

It's grandpa who may be heading off to Iraq.

[OmmmSweetOmmm]

44. I don't know about her Mother but I did read that her Father is originally from Iraq.

[NashVegas]

13. sounds Like Grandma Realized She Doesn't Want to Provide Free Babysitting For 14 Kids

Bless her heart.

[Merlot]

14. Pharmacists and doctors can now opt out of a procedure if they find it goes

against their beliefs. They can not prescribe birth control or morning after pill. They don't have to perform abortions.

Yet no doctor thought that implanting embryos in this obviously mentally ill and financially challenged woman was a problem?

[marshall]

17. Doctors don't have that option--they must treat everyone

Just this past August the California Supreme Court ruled that fertility doctors must provide services to lesbians and cannot opt out because of their religious beliefs. There could be a similar protection in this case.

[Merlot]

21. You mean the doctor can't say "8 embryos is a health risk to you and the child?"

I thought doctors first motto was to do no harm? 8 children born at the same time could kill the mother, and the children will probably have developmental problems.

A doctor couldn't refuse to implant 8 embryos? Really?

I remember when my dad was in the hospital in great pain. The doctor actually didn't want to give him pain killers beccause it could cause addiction. Dad was never going to leave the hospital, was incoherant and on multiple machines. The doctor had the right to make that decision.

[marshall]

24. That's not a belief, it's a medical opinion

Under the current law I do think the doctor would have the right to only implant one, two, or three embryos, but not to tell the mother that she is not fit for the procedure because she isn't married or she already has too many children or she doesn't have a job or her mother doesn't like the idea. The law as followed now protects lesbians (among others) from the capricious exclulsion by religoius doctors based on their "beliefs".

[Hekate]

59. It's not an opinion, it's a medical fact. Higher-order multiples are at huge risk...

... for death or lifelong disabilities. The human uterus was NOT made for lots and lots of babies all at once.

Hekate

[FarCenter]

22. But best practice is to implant no more than 2 or 3 embryos

The UK only allows 2 at a time, Italy 3.

[kestrel91316]

26. Some people will do literally anything for a buck. I still maintain

the doctor who did this needs his/her license yanked. Yesterday.

[notadmblnd]

30. The Dr that did this should have t o pay child support.

[varkam]

15. So Gram's only real problem is that she isn't married?

:crazy:

[LisaL]

18. How on earth did you make this conclusion after reading the OP?

[varkam]

20. Might of had something to do with this:

"It can't go on any longer," she said in a phone interview Friday. "She's got six children and no husband. I was brought up the traditional way. I firmly believe in marriage. But she didn't want to get married."

[LisaL]

23. If her daughter had a husband, then she'd likely be living with

that husband, and not with her parents.
The husband could also get a job to support his brood. So, yea, maybe grandma would be o'key if her daughter was married and had a brood then. I don't find that abnormal.

[varkam]

25. Except that she was hinting that her reasons were "traditional"

read: don't have sex until you get married because the buybull tells you so.

[LisaL]

27. There is nothing to indicate all these children were produced

through sex.
Apparently all of them resulted from IVF.

[varkam]

38. Were they born out of wedlock? eom

[LisaL]

49. Is that a trick question? Couple of posts above it seems you have

realized the woman isn't married.

[varkam]

60. It's a rhetorical question, not a trick question.

Hasn't the traditional taboo been to have children born out of wedlock? (That is also intended as rhetorical)

[marshall]

29. I imagine her problem is that she's expected to provide day care

If they were overly religious they probably would have booted the girl out when she first got herself knocked up--regardless of whether it was via artificial means or an actual man.

[LisaL]

34. Caring for six children doesn't come cheap.

Also, now the daughter has 8 more. There are all kind of reasons grandma could be upset about.
Money, child care, etc.

[Tansy_Gold]

40. Neither does IVF.

Someone is footing the bill for the fertility treatments.

They aren't cheap.



TG

[anonymous171]

16. Sounds like her daughter has a mental illness. nt

[rvablue]

31. Yes. Some Obsessive Compulsion or Hoarding? The fact that it's centered around

accruing more and more children is very, very disturbing.

What will happen to all of these poor kids once grandma and grandpa aren't around anymore?

And frankly, it's not as if she can be stopped. She is free to have more kids .... all it will take is to find a doctor willing to do it.

This whole story is freaky and sad.

[liberalmuse]

28. I don't care how many kids a person has...

as long as they can take care of them and give them the love and nurturing they need. That means not forcing the older kids to act as 'mommy' or 'daddy' and having to babysit the younger kids. That kind of thing pisses me off. If you can't comfortably feed, clothe and house your kids, then you probably shouldn't have a passle of them. I'm not saying that poor people should not have kids. Just that there are limits to how many kids a person should have if they cannot adequately care for them all. That means being there for them as a parent. That being said, I do know a lot of very healthy, well-adjusted and successful adults who grew up in large families.

[whoneedstickets]

35. I hope she considers adoption, there are many couples looking for babies...

..who would be glad to lift the burden from this woman. Sadly, I think she's probably a bit too psychologically unstable to accept this.

[4 t 4]

36. Best wishes and prayers

for Grandma Suleman and those children.

[LisaL]

43. The woman had six children already and wanted more, thus IVF.

Somehow I doubt she did that so she can adopt them out.

[SoCalDem]

37. There are women who experience "baby-love"..

They enjoy the being pregnant part..getting attention from people..and then the infancy stage of the babies, but once those babies turn into toddlers & belligerent adolescents, the moms long for another "baby"..

I always laugh at my young friends who are so hopelessly "in love" with their babies, and are sure it's because THEIR child is so special..and that their child will always be that way..

I always remind them that those big goo-goo eyes, and that sweet little toothless smile NOW, is all about imprinting that image in their brain, so they don't KILL that "child" when he/she's 16 and "borrowing/wrecking" their car, or staying out all night, or "borrowing" money from their wallet, etc.:)..and that every "perfect" child eventually turns into an obnoxious teenager:)

[OmmmSweetOmmm]

46. I had a neighbor who said that God made babies beautiful so their parents wouldn't kill them.

Thank goodness my older son was incredibly gorgeous! I couldn't wait for him to get out of his baby and toddler stages. You name it, I went through it...colic, he started to run at 10 months, tantrums, "experimenting" with the electronics (ie feeding Nintendo apple juice, putting Vaseline on the projection tv screen, writing on walls with red crayon) And OMG! you are describing his growing up to a tee, including borrowing/wrecking the car, "borrowing" money....... He's 21 and still is at home, and although I do love his company, it can be tough. My youngest was the Perfect Baby, Perfect Toddler and really is quite good has suffered. At 18 I still haven't taught him to drive (and he isn't pushing), and luckily money isn't important to him. BTW.... he was nowhere as beautiful as my oldest although he's very cute now!

[SoCalDem]

48. Our middle son drew a Christmas tree on the bedroom wall of a rented house

with a PERMANENT marker... ..then he wrote his name on the beige carpet with it:)

[OmmmSweetOmmm]

63. lol! I truly understand how you must have felt. BTW...the wall with the

red crayon of course had to be repainted. It is a very visible wall that runs along one side of the dining room. He was almost 3 1/2 yrs old and I was 8 months pregnant with my youngest. I was on an important phone call and while talking saw what he was doing. I picked him up, flew up the stairs and placed him on his bed, closed his door and went into my bedroom to cool down. I can't believe I didn't go into labor after that. :)

[SoCalDem]

64. Our son's little stunt happened a week before we were moving, so

we had to scramble to re paint and were lcuky that the bedroom carpeting was NOT a match to the hallway, so we found a carpet remnant large enough, and had a friend who took pity on us, install it for free.. we had a $700 damage deposit to get back.. on the final walkthrough, the leasing agent said.."That carpet looks great..like new"..:rofl:

[OmmmSweetOmmm]

68. Although it wasn't great while you were living it, it really is a great story! Laughing here!

[all.of.me]

39. She's competing with Michele Duggar.......

Sorry. Couldn't help myself. :)

[LostinVA]

41. The whole story reminds meof Diane Downs

[bertman]

45. I don't care how you slice it, that is one FUCKED-UP situation.

[Duer 157099]

47. I think the mom is really pissed at Grandma

and this is her way of getting back at her. Typical passive aggressive behavior, no?

That's some serious revenge!

Maybe the grandma was the kind who often said "I want grandkids" or otherwise pestered her daughter... and maybe mom just finally said "Oh yeah??? OK, here ya go...."

could be :shrug:

[LisaL]

50. Have you even read anything in the OP article?

:eyes:

[arcadian]

51. Gee, thank you Grandma Obvious.

:eyes:

[LisaL]

52. WTF are you even talking about?

[arcadian]

53. Lizzy, it's pretty obvious that the woman was obsessed with having children.

Grandma ain't providin' us with any new info.

[LisaL]

54. Who was it obvious to? Not to me or many other posters.

It's a very strange situation, and nothing about it seems obvious.

[arcadian]

55. A woman who already has 6 children.

Who takes fertility drugs or whatever it was that she did to get octuplets. I think it's pretty obvious that she wants to have children to the point of it being pathological.

[LisaL]

58. Obvious? Again, to whom? People have speculated on all kinds

of reason on why she would do it.

[Texasgal]

61. Even the doctors didn't know she was going to have eight.

They thought she was going to have seven up until the actual birth when they found the 8th baby.

I honestly do not think this woman expected to have eight.

[rainbow4321]

56. Did they every explain why the babies' mom also goes by

the last name Gutierrez?? From a previous marriage? Maybe she didn't change back to her maiden name? If so, is the ex- the dad of any of the kids she had prior to the 8 she just had?

Has the doc that helped her with the IVF come forward or is that info being kept quiet, also?

[LisaL]

57. From what is being reported she was married at one time.

I don't think her ex-husband is the father.

[Duer 157099]

62. OK, how about this theory:

So, grandma says she didn't get pregnant "the usual way" - sort of implying that daughter might actually be a virgin, right? I realize she had eggs frozen and those were implanted.

Daughter claimed she was being "paid" to have these kids.

By whom?

Remember "The Boys from Brazil"??

Grandpa is from Iraq, right?

What if... there's some movement to clone Saddam or something??? What if she's the "chosen" vessel?

It could happen.

:crazy:

[NashVegas]

65. Interesting Theory

I find equally interesting the - obviously false - name used on one of the birth certificates: David Solomon.

[LisaL]

66. She has been married. She got divorced.

So I fail to see how grandma could be implying she is a virgin. And Saddam's clones (I don't think you are serious there) would all be male, obviously.