I wish there could be a private DU forum for us to post

[grace0418]

emails we'd like help refuting. I remember I posted one once because I wanted help coming up with a really good response, and got flamed for posting it. I could see their point, because DU is open for all to read, freepers could read the email too and it would get even greater exposure because they'd pass it along. However, I'm not always good at coming up with the perfect response. And some of the stuff my father-in-law sends me needs THE PERFECT response.

You should see the incredibly racist stuff he forwarded me yesterday. It took me some time, but I eventually sent back a response. I countered a few of the inaccuracies in the email, but then decided that the overriding issue was that it was easily the most racist observation I'd read in a long time. And I couldn't understand why anyone who calls himself or herself a Christian would think up, write out, or forward such an email.

[sandnsea]

1. Your father-in-law??

That's simple.

"Keep your KKK shit to yourself."

How hard is that?

[grace0418]

4. It's not that simple. Because he is someone I care about and isn't inherently a bad

person, I'd rather educate him than just tell him to fuck off.

[sandnsea]

5. He isn't an idiot, he knows what he's doing

Nothing stops that shit faster than calling it what it is in its most blatant terms. Otherwise you're just an enabler.

[grace0418]

10. Actually, he doesn't always know what he's doing. Like I said, he isn't inherently a

bad person. If you met him, you'd think that he was kind and sweet and mild-mannered and generous. And he is. But he's also very easily frightened, very superstitious (he comes from a very superstitious culture and moved to America in his mid-30s), and very gullible. So when some asshole sends him a racist email full of "facts", he doesn't take it with a grain of salt, or think to research those "facts", he just gets freaked out and forwards it.

Believe me, I didn't sugar-coat my response. I called it racist and unbecoming of a Christian to be saying, thinking and forwarding. I'm not religious but he is VERY religious, so I made sure to point that out. It's just that sometimes I want to say more than just "That's bullshit dad, and racist to boot. Stop sending that stuff." I'd rather educate him so that he can realize what he's doing.

I have to chuckle that agnostic, Euro-mutt me is educating my ultra-religious, non-white father-in-law on racism and what it means to be a Christian, but so be it.

[elleng]

11. Discussion short of vulgarity

does NOT make an enabler.

[sandnsea]

17. Yes, it actually does

That is exactly how manipulative people maintain their sick behavior, by getting other people to take responsibility for them in 100 different ways.

And telling someone to keep their KKK shit to themselves is hardly vulgar. I didn't say anything about telling the father in law to fuck off, that was her language.

[sandnsea]

8. Propaganda & Debunking Forum

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_topics&forum=284

[Iggo]

13. Cool!

[grace0418]

14. Interesting, but it doesn't seem like

people read it very often. And it's still open for anyone to read.

But thanks for posting it, I didn't know it was there.

[Idealism]

2. It is a hard thing to understand

Humans are highly imperfect creatures, some more than others. Try not to let it get you down because all you can control are your own thoughts and beliefs. There will always be others who let long-smoldering prejudices and hatred rule reason, and they will continue to justify that in different disgusting ways, but you have no power over them. You can help them see the light, but unless they want to change- they won't.

Try not to beat yourself up over it, you are a good person, which is all that any good person- of any religion- can ask of themselves. :fistbump:

[grace0418]

dupe

[grace0418]

6. That's just it. I do want to help him see the light. And I believe that eventually

I can. I just can't always think of the perfect words.

Thank you though. :hug:

[Idealism]

9. What makes you think he will read these perfect words?

If he is as ignorant to the truth as you suggest, why would he get more than one or two sentences deep in an email that isn't to his liking? Our attention spans have been decreasing for years, largely thanks to computers, and we have a tendency to shut our brains down when we are reading something we deem silly or untruthful.

You can't pound it into his head, he has to want to see it, and who knows what type of event that will take for him to wake up? I am sorry to say but the time you would have to invest just to find "credible" enough sources for him to debunk some statistical claim, etc would be fruitless unless he can bring himself to belief it. Good luck though, I don't mean to discourage you, just steel yourself and realize it is a long process!

[grace0418]

12. He does. He reads everything. He just gets more bullshit than truth in his email

inbox, so that's what he believes. That's always been the right-wing tactic: repeat a lie enough times, really beat people over the head with it, and it becomes truth. People think that the truth will win because it's The Truth, but I don't think that's necessarily the case. I think some people have to be told the truth, repeatedly, in order to have it penetrate their bullshit-addled skulls.

[Idealism]

15. Its utility has diminished since the election but

I would direct him to FactCheck.org if he wants politicians claims on both sides debunked. Great website, non-partisan and experienced.

Other than that, if you want to pm me the email I can perhaps give you some suggestions :)

[Trajan]

16. Email Inboxes - Toxic Portals full of lies ....

My brothers tried to send me bushels full of that rot .... I expressed how dismayed I was that they could be so weak and needy as to uncritically accept what any huckster would send to their email box ....

I get nothing from them now ....

I will never change their heads .... THEY need to do that ....

[cynatnite]

3. Oh, it's probably the same racist shit that everyone else has gotten...

We don't need a private DU room for that. Post it if you want. If someone doesn't like it...ignore it. Someone will almost always respond with something helpful.

[leftstreet]

7. "block email from this address" n/t