PHOTO: Tell the WORLD you are an ex-masturbator thanks to "Passion for Christ" T-shirts

[Bluebear]

Good heavens, this is creepier than the "silver ring thing"!

====


http://www.p4cm.com/p4cm/

A happy client writes:

Simply stated.... How might I assist in this mighty endeavor? See, I, myself am an EX-homosexual... Ridiculed, mocked, abandoned, questioned and disrepected, but here.... Standing on the mighty rock which is the word of the Utmost.. calling out, crying out, screaming ou... JESUS, pull this from me. Kill this in me, so that I mght have a new life in you. Bend me, Break me, Mold me, Create me.... Keep me safe in thy shelter O' GOD... I need thee, I plead to the, I call on you in humility, asking that you simply turn your ear and hear.... JESUS, Savior, Master, Redeemed, Creator, I BEG OF THEE... KILL this in me that I might live... And HE did. I am living proof, and I shall scream it from the depths of the valley, to the hight of the clouds... I AM SAVED... I AM FREE... I AM AN EX---- ex- drug abuser-YES, ex-thief-Yes, ex-doer of iniquity-YES, ex-lost,soul Oh YEs, EX-HOMOSEXUAL---YES, YES, YES... and YES!!!


If there is anything my husband or I can do, simply contact me.

Thanks-

Christina

http://www.p4cm.com/p4cm/events/ex-homosexual#comments

[SoCalDem]

1. Their future employers will be happy to know that factoid

:rofl:

[TlalocW]

2. Oh. My. God.

My Christmas shopping is done for the year.

TlalocW

[Mz Pip]

34. Perfect party favors

for the upcoming engagement party my son and his fiancee are having at my home. :evilgrin:

[panader0]

3. They seem awfully young to quit.

[Bluebear]

7. They're still smiling.

Something is not adding up. :)

[TorchTheWitch]

36. Because they're fucking instead

Why oh why do fundies want so badly to repress a completely natural and healthy urge?

[Arkana]

136. Because their children are naughty children and their private bits

create concentrated evil that makes baby Jesus cry.

Kinda like what old Catholic parents used to tell their children instead of "Everybody Poops".

[FiveGoodMen]

147. Saddlebacking, actually

[blondeatlast]

86. You didn't get to the part about the "juicy" ministry? In the comments--I kid not.

You cannot make this stuff up.

[redqueen]

117. Wha?

I didn't see that...

[TahitiNut]

129. They discovered that oral sex is even better than Rosy Palm and her five daughters.

:rofl:

[bertman]

10. Hell YEAH!!

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

At their age I was just getting going good.

[ZombieHorde]

4. If I ever lose my arms or hands I am getting one of those shirts. nt

[Bluebear]

8. I'll get one when I turn 90.

Maybe.

[tblue37]

150. Probably not. Ernest Borgnine announced on TV (Leno or Letterman, I think)

that he stayed so energetic because he jerked off a lot.

[Marr]

20. HAHAHA!

I love it.

[alsame]

5. I totally misunderstood that photo - I thought it meant they were

no longer masturbating because they were now having sex with each other.

[ZombieHorde]

9. LOL!

[POAS]

103. That may not have been the intent BUT

that is how it will be used...you betcha...yup!

[alsame]

133. Right? They look like a healthy, happy young couple that

...er...enjoy each other. :)

[XOKCowboy]

6. Very small market they are targeting...

if you ask me.

[asdjrocky]

11. Not with those smiles their not.

[Kitty Herder]

37. Now they've got each other.

They don't need self-stimulation anymore. ;-) That's what that picture makes me think.

[MichaelHarris]

12. Ted Hagert

will bend you, bend you right over and he has three of those shirts.

[firedupdem]

13. I've seen it all. My 15 yr old wouldn't go near that shirt! n/t

[Ellen Forradalom]

14. I think TMI4C is more like it

More than I wanted to know, that's for sure.

[arcadian]

15. Would I have to stop right now at this very moment.

to qualify?

[Malikshah]

21. OK. You asked for it. I am in awe of your dexterity and typing abilities.

Not one typo or grammatical error.

Truly a divinity among us mere mortals.

Might I ask, oh divine one, how long it took to type your response? ;)

[dixiegrrrrl]

32. While you are deciding, do stop if your vision becomes blurry...

remember the warning...

[av8rdave]

108. Funny...when I took the FAA physical where the Dr. finally told me I have to have glasses

I looked up from the vision tester and said, "Oh my God, my mother was right!"

[Jamastiene]

110. DUzy!!!!!!

:spray:

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:
:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:
:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:
:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

[Stephanie]

16. The ad copy is appropriate, anyway.

Check out "P4CM TV" as people from the movement give you some live, uncut, behind the scenes footage of The Movement. Get an inside look of what goes down after church. In this episode we discuss the new Ex-Masturbator shirt.

[beac]

30. "Get an inside look of what goes down after church."

Well, that explains the no-more-masturbating. Oral Roberts would be so pleased!

[blondeatlast]

87. Don't miss the comment about the "juicy" ministry. I swear to L'il Jeezy;

see it for yourself.

[Adsos Letter]

17. I would NEVER wear one of those shirts...

...even if it were true...

[vixengrl]

29. It is a "TMI" Conversational Melt-down, isn't it?

("Too Much Information.") If people don't mention their masturbation, why make note of quitting?

:shrug:

[Stevenmarc]

18. I AM FREE ... I guess that one is for the Ex-Prostitute

[reggie the dog]

50. I thought that shirt was for people who renounced religion!

[Marr]

19. I suppose they make sense for couples to wear.

Those two appear to have met each other, and abandoned the solo show. Good for them.

[Lilith Velkor]

35. It could be a way for saddlebackers to detect each other.

[TWiley]

55. saddlebackers LMAO !

Love the name Lilith too BTW !

[City of Mills]

22. The truth -

[riderinthestorm]

23. Liars!

This is creepy and wrong on so many levels....

The "ex homosexual" for starters.

Then the LIE that these beautiful young teens are NOT masturbating (rigggghhhhht).

But to the OP, the silver ring thing has never struck me as funny. It's fucking creepy. Just like this article.

There's a twisted minority of zealots that think like this and embrace all of this creepy shit. To me, they aren't funny. They're sick.

[Bluebear]

24. You are 100% correct.

In fact, I amended the OP to reflect what you are correct in pointing out how creepy, weird, sick this whole thing is.

[Amonester]

33. To me, they're sick AND "scary"

since masturbation is good at preventing prostate cancer, AND at cardiovascular conditioning...

These Young Dudes Should Be Educated About The Benefits, Not Fear-mongered About Silly Fairy Tales (Aimed At Controling Them For Profits).

[ThomCat]

47. Exactly right. They're just twisting people into ashamed, perpetual

liars, who will hate their bodies.

What possible good do they think will come from this? :wtf:

[FiveGoodMen]

148. "There's a twisted minority of zealots that think like this"

And a lazy, wishy-washy, worthless, silent majority that refuses to call them out.

[Touchdown]

25. I think I've seen that guy in "Blackdraft"

At least he wasn't masturbating in it.:evilgrin:

[Cheap_Trick]

26. Current masturbator

Well, not right at this moment.

[tularetom]

27. I've lost 75% of the vision in my right eye

But I haven't stopped yet.

[dixiegrrrrl]

96. Switch hands.

[Jamastiene]

139. It'll even up the vision in the other eye.

Good thinkin' :thumbsup:

[Wiley50]

28. I used to work on a tourist drift fishing boat. Only union job I ever had

I baited the hooks for the squeemish customers who didn't know how to do it right anyway

Started out an apprentice baiter

then worked my way up to journyman

and before I left I was a Master baiter

God, just remembering gives me a wonderful feeling all over

and I can almost feel the squishyness on my hands.

Anyone got a tissue?

[nichomachus]

93. Masturbating has so many positive benefits

1. You don't have to look your best

2. You don't have to call the next day.

3. You meet a much better class of people.

[av8rdave]

109. And you get to be intimate with your favorite person!

[KakistocracyHater]

31. ex-crazy, I doubt they have that

the true parts of the 12th House are coming out & looking !crazy!. I apologize to any moderate Christians/Muslims/Buddhists/Jews, etc. it's not you so much as it's them. Ex-Christian I "sense" with my Third Eye is unavailable too.

[Starry Messenger]

38. Oh man.

I don't think these are going to be popular in their intended audience. }(

[Downtown Hound]

56. I don't know

Going back to what I used to be like in high school, I could totally see myself wearing one of these just for the comedy value.

[Starry Messenger]

127. I teach high schoolers.

I'm not sure what I will do when someone inevitably shows up in one...I will be laughing too hard.

[Vickers]

39. Yeah, but when he *did* beat off, he wore his ring finger right off.

:spank:

[slay]

40. I don't want either of them masterbating my Ex!!

I mean, we just broke up. :rofl: :rofl:

[FloridaJudy]

41. That shirt looks like a guarantee

That a teen will find himself head down in a toilet or trapped in his locker before the school day is out.

[XemaSab]

66. Or getting some hot action under the bleachers

;)

[readmoreoften]

42. I want an Ex-Christian shit.

They go one of those? Nah, I was never a Christian. Anyway, I don't think we have to worry about these shirts being all the rage.

[TWiley]

53. I got one that says ... So many right wing Christians .... So few Lions

I wore it to a college BBQ once, and had plenty of conversation. Normally, I leave it in the closet unless I am looking to stimulate some chatter.

[FloridaJudy]

99. My says "Hell Bound Liberal" eom

[Shardik]

43. Christian Fundamentalism:

The doctrine that there is an absolutely powerful, infinitely knowledgeable, universe spanning entity that is deeply and personally concerned about my sex life.

[readmoreoften]

44. I dare them to walk around in my neighborhood wearing that shirt.

It's a Bloods neighborhood, so they'll be welcome for wearing red, but damn.... that's an assbeatin' in the making. Or, ya know what, someone wearing that shirt might be so fucking scary that people just might keep away.

[readmoreoften]

45. Shouldn't this be shirt be handed to them by a parent during some sort of ceremony?

What about 'family values'? :shrug:

[SeattleGirl]

46. You're fucking kidding me!

Wonder if their schools will tell them not to wear them, because of the "obscene" word masturbator.

But hey, maybe it's okay, 'cause it has "ex" in front of it.

:eyes:

[DUlover2909]

48. dorks.

:silly:

[reggie the dog]

49. you have got to be kidding me

sorry, but why is masturbating a bad thing???? I love watching my wife do it. Does using a vibrator count?????? As a current masturbator (no not while I am on DU) adn a current drug abuser (I smoke weed so christians say any use is abuse, and yes i do that while on DU) i think these people are fucking crazy. Long live orgasams even self induced.

[last_texas_dem]

57. Because God got pissed at Onan

for "spilling his seed on the ground" instead of having sex with his sister-in-law as God had commanded him to... or something like that. I can't remember whether Onan ended up getting smoted (not sure if that's the word. haha) down or not, though...

[reggie the dog]

79. well why not just cum in the shower, or on a rag or something

that way nothing would hit the ground!

[Jamastiene]

113. Or in his own daughters as Lot did.

Yes, yes, that fine upstanding citizen who stood up to the hordes of gay people in the story of Sodom & Gommorah fucked his own daughters because that was the "right" thing to do.

Talk about the sickest story in the world...and I ain't talking about any gay people or masturbaters.

[ferrous wheel]

116. Not smoted, just got a generator named for him.

:rofl:

[Starry Messenger]

126. Fun fact.

Dorothy Parker named her canary Onan because "he spilled his seed on the ground." :D

[spin]

145. The story of Tamar the sister in law is even more interesting...

In Genesis chapter 38, Tamar is first described as marrying Er, the eldest son of Judah;<2> according to the text, God killed Er because he was wicked (although it doesn't give any further details),<3> and so Judah asked his second son, Onan, to have sex with Tamar, so that the offspring could be declared Er's heir.<4> The narrative implies that Onan didn't object to the sex itself, but performed coitus interruptus so that there wouldn't be any offspring he couldn't claim as his own, so God killed him.<5> Judah is portrayed as viewing Tamar to be cursed, and is therefore reluctant to give her to his remaining son, Shelah;<6> he first tells Tamar to act like a widow, until Shelah, the youngest son, has grown up,<6> and then when he finally does, he still won't give Tamar to Shelah in marriage.<7>

According to the text, after Judah's own wife had later died,<8> he decided to use a prostitute at Enaim; the prostitute in question was Tamar, who wore a veil, making herself unrecognisable.<9> The passage goes on to state that Judah offered to pay her a goat in arrears, but she asked for Judah's staff and seal as security towards this payment;<10> having given her this security, he made her pregnant,<11> but when he later sends the goat, she has gone and taken the seal and staff with her.<12> The text states that three months later, Judah is told that Tamar had been acting as a prostitute, and had become pregnant as a result, so he orders that she should be burnt to death;<13> Tamar sent a message to Judah with his signet ring and cords and staff; and announced that the owner of the items is the father of the children. Judah recognises them, stating that she is more righteous than he is. Judah, afterwards, takes her in to his house, but does not have any more sexual relations with her. Tamar later gives birth to twins (Perez and Zarah). Perez is in King David and Jesus Christ' lineage.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tamar_(Bible)

[TWiley]

51. EX-Masturbators because now they Fuck?

I would gladly help her out of her sinful condition.

[Hekate]

52. Talk about self- abuse! Nothing like putting ideas in the heads of everyone who sees you...

Can you imagine how much they (especially the girl) get hit on? and pretty crudely, at that.

This is either a really crappy idea or someone's idea of a joke.

Hekate

[Zodiak]

54. My step-dad is both gullible and stubborn (go figure)

When he got divorced, sex stopped for him. He was taught that masturbatin was a sin, so he did not do it, and for some reason, his body never "expressed" in a wet dream.

Well, after a few months of this, he lost his ability to pee properly. He went to the doctor, who put on a glove and made him bend over. The doctor massaged his prostate and he was "relieved".

Then the doctor told him that if he didn't start to masturbate, he'd see him in a couple of months.

Needless to say, my step-dad got a lesson in the difference between what people say and what they do.

"Ex-masturbator", my ass....not if you like to be able to pee.

[corkhead]

58. I think I will make arrangements to be buried in one...

...FROM... MY...COLD...DEAD...HANDS!!!

[cboy4]

59. I remember in Catholic school when we learned that

masturbating was a sin.

We laughed and laughed.

And I'm still laughing.

[acmavm]

73. In Catholic school EVERYTHING was a sin. Do not doubt those

old stories about patent leather shoes! I got thumped on the head in the third grade for wearing my Easter shoes to school. (I also got thumped for barfing on the stairs when I couldn't make it to the bathroom. And for wearing coulottes in high school.)

Crap, now that I think about it, I got thumped on the head a lot while I was in school.

Too bad a few priests didn't take up beating off. The church would be a lot richer than it is if they'd have kept their hands to 'themselves' (so to speak).

[cboy4]

76. I never got thumped but we had one crazy ass nun who used

to turn over desks she deemed were messy while we were out at recess.

And I agree with you about the priests.

[acmavm]

77. We had twins in our third grade class, Richard and I Forget, and

poor Richard had to use the bathroom but Sr. Mary Gabiel wouldn't let him go. So poor kid peed his pants.

That bitch made him keep newspapers under his desk for the whole rest of the year.

[trusty elf]

60. self-delete

[JVS]

61. Is this going to lead to shirts that say "Masturbation Recidivist" kind of like the Darwin fish?

[SalmonChantedEvening]

62. This is a shirt that says

Just whoop my ass now.

[DisgustipatedinCA]

63. Have you seen the treatise on masturbation linked from the site?

Oh my god, this is better than any satire I've read in awhile. The link listed in the OP has hyperlinks to a screed against masturbation. The whole thing is worth reading, for the tortured logic if nothing else.

http://www.dasouth.com/features/drty/450-masterbation

Excerpts:
-"I have heard it said by many, especially by "Christians", that masturbation is not sex and even if you don't have a third grade education, you can clearly see that masturbation is sex."

Here's a quote showing that non-believers can still masturbate:
-"Okay, now that we agree that masturbation is sex, then what is wrong with it? I'm glad you asked. For those of you who don't believe in God or live for Him, then this is not for you."

On the climactic aftershocks of illegal orgasms:
-"Any other orgasm achieved outside of marriage couldn't handle its intense, explosive, addictive, domineering, gripping force without repercussions. Yes, you could very well achieve and very much well, enjoy one, but not without suffering the impact of its climactic aftershocks. Yes, I just said it, Church! Yes, the tremors may feel good, but the aftermath, the consequences of an illegal orgasm is traumatic."

3 seconds to completion vs. cold, dry sheets:
-"the trap is not worth the 3 seconds it took to get it. Trust me, I've been there, and I'd rather have cold, dry sheets than to fondle my self."

Post-coital religious guilt:
-"Most people who have engaged in masturbation know that the culmination of this sexual act ends in shame. I don't have to share with you the thousands of emails of the admittance of this shame because you know all too well since you have experienced it yourself. Curled up in a fetal position, crying, because your bed is even more empty and you're lonelier than you did before you violated yourself."

Masturbation is a cruel mistress:
-"Because MASTERbation will MASTER you! You enter into a contractual agreement with it and it will govern your life sexually. It will rule and control your life...it taps you on the shoulder 3 o'clock in the morning even when you don't want it. You want to stop but you can't. You cry, you repent and say you won't do it any more but you find yourself molesting yourself again...When will it ever end? I'm here to tell you that cold showers don't work and saying you won't do it anymore won't either."

Wrap it up with a personalized sales pitch:
-"Because of that, I am offering my book not only at a deeply discounted price but I will autograph it and ship it to you the same day you order it. Because the torment of masturbation leaves your life TODAY! You will no longer have to be controlled by masturbation because you will now finally MASTER it!"

[Divine Discontent]

65. ha!

as a Christian, I laugh at their bizarre focus on masturbation. Love the last line, "You will no longer have to be controlled by masturbation because you will now finally MASTER it!" --- it's almost like someone wrote that to be funny - but as with these types, they're blind to their own self-parody! (if I said that right)

[DisgustipatedinCA]

68. Zoiks. I just got to the comments section

There are some real helpful hints here too:

-"Paul gave the solution for those struggling with lust - GET MARRIED. He said it is better to marry then to burn ."

-"But its still possible to masturbate and not think about lustful thoughts. Its difficult and unlikely sure, but not impossible."..."Heres a simple solution. If you already have kids or dont plan to have them. Go get your testicles surgically removed. Itll save you the hassle and the trouble of dealing with the temptation."

-"There is NO WAY to masturbate and not think lustful thoughts, or at least PERVERTED thoughts (imagining having "relations" with animals, or even a tree or whatever! yuck!)."

-"From my own point of view its difficult to maintain sexual integrity in a sex saturated world. Despite this their is no excuse when there's Jesus. So those of us who are struggling with this diease, find jesus and hold on tight."

[blondeatlast]

91. And don't miss the "juicy" ministry one. I'm NOT making that up, either. nt

[Starry Messenger]

120. "find jesus and hold on tight..."

Is that what the kids are calling it these days? :D

[Jamastiene]

125. I bet Jesus would love that!

"So those of us who are struggling with this diease, find jesus and hold on tight."

I know. I'm going to Hell, but at least I'll have lots of fun getting there.

:evilgrin:

[high density]

81. Wow. How does not masturbating help when "it taps you on the shoulder?"

It seems like a normal bodily function to me. It's like getting an urge to pee... You just do it, and after you're done, you're all set for a little while. :evilgrin:

[BattyDem]

98. "the consequences of an illegal orgasm is traumatic"

Illegal orgasm? :crazy: :rofl:

[av8rdave]

112. "Illegal orgasm"

I don't know why, but I find that term absolutely hilarious!

Sounds like something a guy in a striped shirt in the middle of an athletic field would say. I wonder what the hand signal for that is?

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

[Bluebear]

114. 'I wonder what the hand signal for that is?'

:spray:

[Arugula Latte]

137. That would be a good band name.

Kind of like Homer Simpson's grunge band, "Sadgasm."

[Jamastiene]

142. It would probably look something like this

but without the eyes rolling...well...at least without the eyes rolling that way, of course. :evilgrin:

:rofl:

[Elidor]

119. "The aftermath, the consequences of an illegal orgasm is traumatic..."

Only if you're very, very good at it.

[acmavm]

143. MASTURbation will MASTER you??? Is that for real? I guess this is just

another one of those cases where anonymous people on a website can make me embarrassed that I am of the same species.

Sheesh!

[Divine Discontent]

64. thank God I'm not ashamed of my sexuality like they are & all Christians aren't like this

but don't let that stop (as if it ever has) some from attacking Christians en masse for the strange actions of the fringe.

Who would want a shirt that says that? Strange folks indeed. I agree with the above comment - kids are begging to be picked on by wearing that! ha

[XemaSab]

67. Is that guy throwing the SHOCKER?????

:rofl:

[a la izquierda]

82. Oh my god he IS! N/T

[Goblinmonger]

89. That's why she's smiling n/t

[IDemo]

69. Maybe they should just say "I'm with Lefty"

[Solly Mack]

70. Check out the "ex-atheist" video (near the bottom at first link)

ROFLMAO

[Stinky The Clown]

71. I'll take a dozen "I Do Myself" tee shirts, thanks

[stuntcat]

72. 'cause every sperm is sacred

:eyes:



The Earth's gone to Hell, I'm so glad my life's half over.

[maxrandb]

74. With apologies to Pete

"See Me, Feel Me, Touch Me, Heal Me"

[juno jones]

75. Where's Dr Ruth when you need her?

Or even Jocelyn Elders.

Actually masturbation is quite useful for women. According to some sex therapists, many 'frigid' women are never learned to climax in the first place. I can see no wrong in teaching people how to enjoy their bodies, especially when it's going to be even more useful down the road in a sexual relationship.

If they're so against sex why do they think about it all the time and see it everywhere? Sick bastards.

[progressoid]

78. Umm...err...

:yoiks: :yoiks: :yoiks: :yoiks: :yoiks: :yoiks: :yoiks: :yoiks: :yoiks:

[peekaloo]

80. Neo-Fornicators.

the devil's in the decals :P

[Snarkoleptic]

83. Sadly, a full recovery will take years...

[Sabriel]

84. But they have more free time now.

They no longer have to spend hours shaving their palms.

[cherish44]

85. Christian Right

Coo Coo for Cocoa Puffs

[La Lioness Priyanka]

88. i am a proud ex-heterosexual

i have given up my sinful ways. praise be the lord.

[EstimatedProphet]

90. Strangely enough, there's no "EX-Fuckwit" shirt.

[nichomachus]

92. Don't these people watch Seinfeld? n/t

[JohnnyBoots]

94. I think I might order a bunch of those for the next time my Rugby club goes on tour.

[ismnotwasm]

95. Time to wear my

"Jesus Would Slap The Shit Out Of You" tee shirt again I see.

[auburngrad82]

97. You mean I can no longer have sex with Jennifer Anniston???

Or Kim Kardashian, or Jessica Simpson, or the hot chick who works at the dry cleaners, or-

Aw, shit.

[Dukkha]

100. You can pry my member from my cold dead hand!

NEVER!

[Karenina]

101. This is SATIRE, right?

:hide:

[begin_within]

102. They should at least have an alternate style

[POAS]

104. I want an "EX-Christian Hypocrite" shirt! n/t

edited for stupid speeling error.

[JuniperLea]

106. Hey! I'm one of those! eom

[progressoid]

131. They have those too!

?v=0

?v=0

[JuniperLea]

105. Do they come with matching liar liar pants on fire panties?

Cuz they would have to be telling the truth to Jesus, right?

Edited to say... how about a pair of hairy-palm gloves? And a seeing eye dog.

[Jamastiene]

107. Well lookie there! The faces of the Future Liars of America Club.

Future? Hell, they are lying through those pearly white teeth now.

Liar lie lie liars!
You liar lie lie liars!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hJca_-PsXJA

:rofl:

They are sooooooooooooooo lying.

[TK421]

111. I'm confused.....

"You cry, you repent and say you won't do it any more but you find yourself molesting yourself again...When will it ever end? I'm here to tell you that cold showers don't work and saying you won't do it anymore won't either."

WHO THE FUCK cries when they flog the dolphin? I sure don't! Hell...what's the opposite of crying?

The Kleenex ain't for tears, buddy!! :rofl:

[Elidor]

115. Funny, they sure look like a couple of jerkoffs to me

Being that stupid should be painful.

[rug]

118. This is what happens after a divorce.

[Rob Gregory Browne]

121. I feel sad for these people, but...

...if this is what gets them through the night, so be it.

rgb

[dembotoz]

122. perfect gag bridal shower or bach party gift.

see how much they blush.

[SidDithers]

123. Picture fixed...

:evilgrin:

Sid

[VOX]

124. I will not masturbate. I w-will n-not mastur-b-bate. I will not...I will...not..not...I will..will..

:nuke: :nuke: NOT MASTURBATE after this one last session! :nuke: :nuke:

O8) Promise. Swear to God. O8) I say "never again" to that nice natural feeling of release and relief. O8) NO NO NO NO. :evilgrin:

[defendandprotect]

128. Right . . . don't touch your own body . .. it's not legit unless you give someone else . . .

access to your private parts!!

But, even at that, wait until you are 21 and don't use a condom!!!

Human sexuality provides a release for stress -- an awakening --



PS: Is "Christian-Evangelical" synonymous with insane?

[AnnieBW]

130. Do they have an "Ex-Catholic" one?

Or "Ex-Christian?"

[Jamastiene]

134. We should go ahead and make a bunch like that.

We are going to need major funding to fight this extremely weird behavior. Have you heard about that other bunch who are going to search for still living dinosaurs who are guarding Noah's Ark? :crazy:

[Crabby Appleton]

132. Do they have any Master-Masturbator shirts?

I need a 2XL please

Kthxbai

[Arkana]

135. Oh my God

I'd love to get one that says just "Masturbator".

[eowyn_of_rohan]

140. Buy this, and make an X over EX with a permanent marker!

[eowyn_of_rohan]

138. ROFL!!!!!!

OMG

[prostock69]

141. Unbelievable. Why do people feel the need to advertise they don't

masturbate? Is that supposed to make them special? This is how fucked up religion is. Truly, I am amazed.

[krabigirl]

144. what total effing loser would wear this shirt? LOL!!!

[Kaleva]

146. Like smoking, I've quit hundreds of times.

[Stevenmarc]

149. EX-Diva ...ROFL

Someone needs to tell that derivative spoken word wannabe that you actually need to be a Diva to become an EX-Diva