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Octuplets' mother had depression, suicidal thoughts while starting a family

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kskiska Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-06-09 10:07 AM
Original message
Octuplets' mother had depression, suicidal thoughts while starting a family
(snip)

Born in Fullerton and raised in La Puente, Hacienda Heights and Rowland Heights, she grew up in a "protected and sheltered" home environment, Suleman told a state-appointed doctor who was reviewing a workers' compensation claim. She enjoyed schoolwork and earned grades that were "well above average." She described herself as "half Arabic, half Lithuanian" and said she was brought up Protestant and continued to practice her religion. She is portrayed as an outgoing woman with many friends; a former cheerleader who liked reading and writing.

Not long after high school, Suleman began her quest as a single woman to have a family of her own. In 1995, she had the first of three ectopic pregnancies, a condition that routinely ends in miscarriage and can be dangerous to the mother. The records are unclear about whether those pregnancies were the result of artificial insemination.

A year later, she married Marcos Gutierrez, a produce manager. She also earned a psychiatric technician license from Mt. San Antonio College and began working at Metropolitan State Hospital, a psychiatric facility in Norwalk. It was there that she sustained the injury that led to the workers' compensation claim.

(snip)

When she became pregnant again in 2000, she was so nervous after multiple failed attempts that she didn't want to talk about it to anyone, she told a psychologist who was evaluating her as part of her workers' compensation claim.

"I thought I would jinx it," Suleman told Dennis A. Nehamen. "It's the most wonderful, best thing that's ever happened in my life. . . . I was still thinking it's too good to be true. . . . When you have a history of miscarriages you think it will take a miracle."

During her pregnancy and after the birth of her first child, Suleman's records indicate, she experienced wild mood swings. Despite her joy at being pregnant, she told Nehamen, "It was during that time I became depressed and I just wanted to die."

Nehamen said in his report that the depression was not related to her back injury, but stemmed from "the powerful and uncontrollable emotions associated with her pregnancy -- both the fear that it would end and her elation that it might be brought to fruition and she would realize her dream of having a child."

more…
http://www.latimes.com/news/printedition/front/la-me-octuplets6-2009feb06,0,1617934.story
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Bunny Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-06-09 10:16 AM
Response to Original message
1. I 'm waiting to have the doctor who implanted her identified.
I would really like to know more about how and why he/she did this. Clearly this octuplet mom should have been screened before implanting her with EIGHT embryos, and I would very much like to know why this apparently did not happen.
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kskiska Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-06-09 10:20 AM
Response to Reply #1
3. She claims that 6 embryos were implanted
for each of her pregnancies.
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Bunny Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-06-09 10:23 AM
Response to Reply #3
5. That's even more ridiculous. I wonder if she had these procedures
done in another country?
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LynneSin Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-06-09 10:41 AM
Response to Reply #3
10. Thing is - no sane or reputable fertility doctor would plant more than 2-3 tops
Even Sextuplets risk danger for both the mother and unborn children. And if the mother is hesitant about selective reduction it saves having that issue if all 6 of the eggs manage to take.

So really, who is this doctor - his/her license needs to be pulled. There are guidelines out there as to how many eggs can be used IVF because of health reasons. Fertility doctors are not there to break world records and create media sensations. They are there to help mothers who cannot have children deliver a healthy baby, sometimes 2 healthy babies each time IVF is used.
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TwilightGardener Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-06-09 10:17 AM
Response to Original message
2. This woman shouldn't have had ANY kids until she got herself
straightened out with some psychiatric help--she sounds at the very least bipolar.
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nc4bo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-06-09 10:20 AM
Response to Original message
4. Saw a clip of her this morning on a cable station - CNN or MSNBC.
I imagined if you could cover her head with a scarf she'd have made a pretty good Virgin Mary impersonator.

:puke:
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TNDemo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-06-09 10:41 AM
Response to Reply #4
11. I know this is really petty,
but did she have her lips done?? They looked like they had been surgically plumped up.

Love your avatar.
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Hell Hath No Fury Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-06-09 01:52 PM
Response to Reply #11
14. It appears she has had some significant plastic surgery...
including her nose, lips (wildly overfilled) and some other work. What she has had done looks completely unnatural. :(
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TNDemo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-06-09 07:12 PM
Response to Reply #14
19. She is searching for happiness apparently -
through her looks and now through her children.
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Shakespeare Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-06-09 07:24 PM
Response to Reply #11
20. Trout mouth. WAY over-injected lips.
I'm curious when she had in the injections done, too.
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FedUpWithIt All Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-06-09 10:24 AM
Response to Original message
6. She just assured her children some of the same issues that plagued her own childhood.
Edited on Fri Feb-06-09 10:36 AM by FedUpWithIt All
"I just longed for certain connections and attachments with another person that I -- I really lacked, I believe, growing up," Suleman said. "I didn't feel as though, when I was a child, I had much control of my environment. I felt powerless. And that gave me a sense of predictability. I -- reflecting back on my childhood, I know it wasn't functional. It was pretty -- pretty dysfunctional, and whose isn't?"

It is difficult to form parental attachments when there are so many children which can leave children feeling alienated. These 14 children will have NO control over their own lives due to the extreme chaos and possible dysfunction they will live under.

In another article she says that her childhood left her feeling a lack of "self and identity".

Try being one of 14. Or better one of the "octuplets"

http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/life_and_style/health/article5673172.ece

Really sad for these kids.
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nc4bo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-06-09 10:39 AM
Response to Reply #6
9. The media really needs to expose her before they start the interview/talk show circus
To ignore that the woman has some serious issues is completely irresponsible and glamorizes this woman.

Many questions should be answered and some deep digging into this woman's history will probably answer more questions.

But seems to me that they want to make some kind of hero out of her first to gain public support. More of her story will become available I'm certain of it but public sympathy and support will be already on her side (think what happened with Sarah Palin and her kids).





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customerserviceguy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-06-09 11:29 AM
Response to Reply #9
12. This woman is no Sarah Palin
Look, I know we don't like Caribou Barbie here for a million reasons, but she didn't go out and persuade some unethical doctor to implant those kids in her.

The comparison is ridiculous.
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nc4bo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-06-09 01:12 PM
Response to Reply #12
13. What is not ridiculous is how she held her kiddies out on the stage and then
Edited on Fri Feb-06-09 01:17 PM by nc4bo
feigned outrage when some called her out on the obnoxious behavior?

THAT is not ridiculous?

Put it out for public consumption but take the lumps you're bound to receive.

This woman is out there to make money by playing on the public. The media is allowing it to happen without so much as a question as to who the doctor was, who the donor was (since it was mentioned that it was someone she knew), why the family lost their home and are now living in a 2 bedroom house, who is supporting all the kids, just lots of questions that deserve truthful answers now, not after the public sympathy brigade begins.
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customerserviceguy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-06-09 10:35 PM
Response to Reply #13
21. As I recall, the Obamas complained
when some toy company named dolls after the daughters that they trotted on stage. Politicians of every party and philosophy do it. It's despicable, but everybody does it, not just Sarah Palin.
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Avalux Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-06-09 10:36 AM
Response to Original message
7. She sustained a back injury that kept her from work and paid over 170K in benefits.
In spite of this she continued to have children; the pregnancies exacerbating her injury so she couldn't even lift her baby. Now, she 6 children and 8 babies - how the hell can she lift and carry all these children if she's so severely disabled?

Natalie Suleman has some serious psychological issues and I certainly hope the state is examining how she intends to adequately care for all of these children.

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rvablue Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-06-09 02:05 PM
Response to Reply #7
15. Ding! Ding! Ding! You hit it right on the head and now she will most
likely lose those benefits. IF she can continually lift those babies and sit in a feeding position for all of them for hours on end, that would dispute her claim that she cannot work because of back pain.
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Wiley50 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-06-09 10:38 AM
Response to Original message
8. The Amazing OctoPussy Hits the Stage. I'm so sick of this distraction! n/t
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Control-Z Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-06-09 02:11 PM
Response to Original message
16. The more I hear about this,
the sadder the situation seems. If Nadya Suleman was gambling on her new set of kids and the income they'd bring, then she was probably never prepared to take care of them in the first place. If she had all these children out of her need to fulfill something inside herself, then she will probably never find what is missing. Children need their parents for emotional stability not the other way around.

I fear the heartache if any of these babies end up with severe developmental problems. I imagine the (literally) impossible situation this will be if she doe not get an enormous amount of freebies and hands on help. And no matter how well this first year turns out, I'm afraid her growing children will not feel as miraculous to her as these tiny babies. Will she then need more babies?

What happens when she has a bunch of young people attending school with kids from traditional families? When they have opinions of their own. When they want things like other kids have. When she needs three jobs just to provide the basics. Without a celebrity income to pay for clothes and food, and beds, and a million other things, how will these kids ever feel like they fit in with their peers? It has been reported that she has already suffered from debilitating depression. Imagine that dynamic with 14 children to care for.

I keep looking for that magical answer that makes this all reasonable for her. But, really, there is nothing reasonable about the situation, at least nothing that I've heard yet. For the sake of, especially, the kids, I hope someone finds it in their heart to help out. I can't imagine them getting by without it.

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ogneopasno Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-06-09 02:19 PM
Response to Original message
17. I know I'm one of the few around here, but my heart aches for this woman because she didn't get the
help she so clearly needed. At many times, someone could have stepped in to put her on the right track, and it never happened. Because of that, she is ridiculed and mocked -- and has a ton of kids. Sad.
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vanderBeth Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-06-09 02:26 PM
Response to Reply #17
18. I feel bad for her because I honestly believe that she is not sane
Of what people have said of her, she really seems like as compulsive hoarder and that she has the maturity (possibly the same mental development) of a teenager.
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