White House Adds Eight Inches To White House Fence

[The Sushi Bandit]

WASHINGTON, DC—Citing a need for heightened national security measures, President Bush had eight inches added to the 12-foot fence that surrounds his residence at 1600 Pennsylvania Ave.

"The president has always been a staunch advocate of domestic security, and this brave decision says to any potential burglar that if you want to get into his house, you are going to have an extra eight inches of fence to contend with," said White House press secretary Tony Snow at a news briefing Monday, adding that the president will also leave the television and the lights on every time he and the first lady go out. "In addition, the president got another guard dog, and, from now on, the garage doors will always be closed."

While Snow denied rumors that the Bushes were considering moving to a safer nearby suburb, he confirmed that the new "This White House Protected By A Homeland Security System" sign on the front lawn is indeed just a clever deterrent

http://www.theonion.com/content/news_briefs/white_house_adds_eight

p.s. PARODY!

[hedgehog]

1. How can anyone write parody anymore when the truth is so absurd!

The people at the Onion must have one of the hardest jobs around these days!

[jobycom]

2. LOL. Cute! nt

[LisaM]

3. Their headlines are so believable!

Especially when you consider that one of the first things they did, in early 2001, was to limit the number of tour groups coming through the White House on a daily basis. The peoples' house!

[no_hypocrisy]

4. Why not electrify the entire damned thang and get it over with??

[Robbien]

5. You know this is a crazy world when one has to wonder

about a headline such as this one. Upon reading it you think "is this true? Could be."

[jmowreader]

6. Obviously Bush outsourced the Secret Service

Eight inches of fence? While this sounds like something Bush would plausibly DO, were I a burglar I'd be more worried about all the people with guns walking around the premises.

[benld74]

7. Now if they could only add 8 points to *'s IQ