I am filing for bankruptcy - I paid the attorney's retainer yesterday.

[Minimus]

I have always prided myself on paying my bills on time and having a very high credit score but now all of that will be behind me.

I have been unemployed since November 2008 and am now on unemployment - getting the max amount but less than half of what I used to earn.

My husband and I separated last year and through mutual agreement he kept the house. He tried and tried to refinance to get my name off of the mortgage but unfortunately was never able to get a bank to do it. He lost his job and is making way less than what he used to make. He has struggled to keep up with the modest mortgage payments (we had a small house - not more than we could afford) and has borrowed as much from his family as he can, but finally just had to quit paying the mortgage. He is actually going to move back up north and live with his parents for a while.

Since my name is still on the mortgage they started calling me - and then other creditors decided to raise my interest rates since I am now not "credit worthy" (some upped the rates even before this happened though).

My ex and I both had to take money from our IRAs/401Ks last year to help make ends meet so we are really getting hit with the penalties on our 2008 taxes. I guess the IRS will just have to take monthly payments and add on interest and penalties.

I spent the day calling all my creditors informing them that I am filing bankruptcy. Surprisingly most of the people I spoke with were pleasant and very understanding.

Today has been a sucky depressing day - I will be 45 years old in a few weeks and I have to depend on my parents for support. The bankruptcy will be on my credit report for 10 years so I will be 55 years old before I can even think about having a decent credit score again.

I know there are many worse off than me. I am living in a house owned by my parents and they help out with my living expenses. Thank goodness I have them and they are in the position to help me. And thank goodness I do not having any children. I feel so bad for any families going through financial difficulties. It has to be so hard on children.

Thanks for listening to my bitch session.

[SoCalDem]

1. Take heart, Minimus.. It will not be as bad as you imagine.

My best friedn did this in 2003 (I think that was the year).. She fretted and fumed and fussed, and felt awful about DOING it, but once it was done, she said it was like the weight of the world lifted from her shoulders..

Paying CASH for things felt good, and she could finally sleep at night..

Her "ruined credit" was a myth, because less than 5 years later she was able to rent a nice place without so much as a raised eyebrow from the leasing agency..

Banks started offering her credit immediately after the BK (probably different these days, though), and once the payment parade was over, she could do a sensible budget, and live within in..and have a savings account..

I still help her with the big things...like $3200 interest free to help her finally leave the lout who put her into bankruptcy..but that's another story)..but over all she's happier than ever and not a bit stigmatized..

and you will be fine too :hug:

[Minimus]

4. Thanks for your words of encouragement.

And for the :hug:

[ikojo]

6. 2003 was before the Biden supported

bankruptcy reforms passed in 2005.

[Ichingcarpenter]

11. The new laws suck, I'm glad the OP has a place to live

bankruptcy isn't as bad a foreclosure. I think the whole

'credit report' crap will be worthless in 2 years with 1/4 of the
nation's credit in the crapper.

Hell, the banks should have two forms of IDs these days
since they are bankrupt.

My heart goes out to the OP.

[rwheeler31]

18. Is fico another idiocy?

[Ichingcarpenter]

25. It will be irrelevant

except to the banking and financial system that existed before.

[SoCalDem]

31. I don't know my Fico...OR care...

we pay cash for what we buy, and have only one credit card (Discover), which we use for small things every month or so, to keep active (it's got a $13,900.00 credit limit) so if we ever had a true emergency, we have it, but we don't need to use it.

The house we are in, is the ONLY house we will ever have for the rest of our lives...there's nothing we need a FICO score for..

[Ichingcarpenter]

37. I don't care either on my Free Credit report . com

Since I think my foreclosure is worse than a bankruptcy.

I really think the whole system will have to be rehashed and what exists now will become irrelevant within 2-4 years.

[TorchTheWitch]

41. So true! I filed around the same time

I felt terrible about doing and dragged my feet for a couple more years until there was just no other option, but immediately afterwards, it really was like the weight of the world had been lifted. I wish I had done it sooner. Things are a million times better for me now and I've never had a problem with credit (I never was more bombarded by credit offers than right after I filed!), but I didn't ever really use credit for the most part anyway. My debt was mostly medical bills I couldn't hope to ever pay off in my natural lifetime although I spent several years going hungry while trying to.

Don't feel bad, Minimus! It isn't anywhere near as bad as you imagine, and you'll feel sooooooo much better when it's done! A new beginning is a billion times better than continuing to slog it out. I was even able to rent a house only a couple months after filing, and my landlady had no problem with it at all.

:hug:

[bkkyosemite]

2. Be careful after the bankruptcy because they will want you to get credit again

why...because for ten years you can't file again. Cheer up there is life after bankruptcy and you have never been alone. Good honest people like you have been there too.:grouphug:

[Minimus]

5. Thank you.

And thank goodness for DU - and for my parents for realizing that internet connection is not a luxury but a necessity.

[AnnieBW]

38. Absolutely.

Prepare to be inundated with credit card offers, etc. Just throw them away. It's more rope to hang yourself with.

I had to file BK in 2003, because my husband was out of work for 11 months. The good news is that there IS life afterwards, and if you keep up with your payments, things WILL work out. Hang in there. It sucks now, but things will work out.

[flvegan]

3. I'm so very sorry for your situation.

[Minimus]

7. Thank you flvegan.

[davidwparker]

8. Cheer up. It's good that you have your family to fall back on.

[xchrom]

9. years ago now -- but i had to do that when my business failed.

it hurts at the time.

and it was difficult to travel.

but -- a little time went by -- and i felt so, so much better not having people hound me.



:toast: you're gonna be all right.

[cliffordu]

10. I went bankrupt a couple of years ago....

I haven't even thought about credit since....Don't care if I ever have it again.

My wife and I had to reorder our lives to live COMPLETLY within our means (meager) but I have never been happier.

Fuck the credit card companies. I will never have another card.

[norepubsin08]

39. I am so sorry for all who are going through that

I had cancer twice (14 years ago, the second time..it wasn't insured...I had 186,000 in medical and filed for bankruptcy..I know the pain of it and I also know that things will one day be better) PS: IO live in Tacoma and would love to do a DU meetup sometime-Peace Mike

[cliffordu]

40. I'm up here in Port Townsend - We should do a meet up at Fort Worden....

Nice pic-a-nic out near the lighthouse.....

I can show everybody the buildings where they filmed "officer and a gentleman"

And of course, the highlight of the tour, the building where I was born......

:rofl:

[norepubsin08]

46. I love Port Townsend

That would be a great place...with over night capabilities...I would have to figure out how to get up there...my car sucks...don't think it would make it from Tacoma...I'm willing tohold a pot luck at my place though

[norepubsin08]

47. Or we could use my church

we have a great facility for stuff like that in Downtown Tacoma

[cliffordu]

49. Sure. I can ride my bicycle anyplace in the state....

[walkaway]

12. I'm so sorry...I am next

Everything was going fine for me until Sept 18th. I had an accident that put me on my back for three months and functioning poorly since. I just paid for my last month of health insurance and my last mortgage payment. My business will be gone completely soon. I live alone and my biggest worry is for my dogs. I just don't see a future anymore.

[bkkyosemite]

14. Know you are not alone. If you need food for the dogs I can pitch in. We are in this together ....

:grouphug:

[walkaway]

19. That is so sweet.

To be honest, I'm really worried about where we are going to live and if we can be together. I never thought I would ever think about finding homes for Henry and Robbie. I have always taken great care of all of my animals and even moved for their sake. To me they are like my children but they need a real home and it seems I can't give that to them anymore.

It's really difficult to even think about. I believe Robbie ( a little heinz 57 I found on the streets) will be easy to place but Henry (my adopted Cairn) is a special case. It's going to be hard to find someone to take care of him.

Wish me luck.

[Doremus]

21. I'm so sorry. :(

Are there any no-kill shelters in your area? It would be good to begin researching that now so you'll be prepared with Plan B if need be.

We're watching our business wither away too, but if there's something I or other DU members can do please let us know. We care about you.

I'm in NE Ohio -- are you anywhere around here?

[bkkyosemite]

22. On Craigslist where I live (Medford OR) there are those just like you. Please explain your situation

as there are very caring people on there. Go to the Craigslist forum for pets if they have one in your area and explain. Also here we have a Humane Society and Foster care that do not let these pets go until a suitable caring and responsible home takes them. Tell your story as those who can will. Best of luck.:hug:

AND you hang in there. These are very rough times for many of us but we have to chin up and know we are not alone. Research possible scenario's for you. Reach out check out. Look to do possible live in work for now. Something that will afford you an option. Look at subsidized housing...start looking be strong and know a prayer is going out to you.

[walkaway]

26. I have fostered many dogs myself and I hope to find good homes for both

but Henry is a special needs dog. I just have to calm down and figure it all out. Thanks a lot. This is the first time I have talked about it to anyone and my mind is all over the place.

[Ichingcarpenter]

28. 'my mind is all over the place.'

Isn't that the truth..... I'm in the same rut and its depressing.

I have problems focusing since its overwhelming.

[bkkyosemite]

36. Take a deep breath and start a list and take one priority at a time. been there myself.

[prolesunited]

30. I know what you mean

saying it out loud makes it real. You sound very depressed (no kidding). Can you talk to your doctor or a county social worker or something to see what resources are available? Also, if you've exhausted everything, maybe you would qualify for food stamps or some other aid. Hang on.

[bkkyosemite]

35. Just the other day there was a special needs doggy that got adopted off of CL...best wishes.

[glinda]

27. Try not to give them up. I mean, if you only have two. We have five and I worry!

My brother had to declare bankruptcy about 11 years ago. He is doing ok now. Well as ok as people can.
But if you can get unemployment and maybe a cheap place to rent that you can keep your two pooches.... Geeeeze!!!!!!!!!!

[Jane Austin]

33. What state do you live in?

Need to know so I can offer suggestions.

[northernlights]

45. Where are you?

Some areas are setting up food pantries for dogs and cats. I know I just read about one right in my poverty-stricken Maine village.

[TuxedoKat]

48. Wow, this is a great idea.

I mean, I'm all for helping people too, but people need help for their pets and to keep their pets too. My GS Troop was looking for a project for their Silver Award to help animals and the environment... maybe we could do something like this. Pet food costs have gone up dramatically too. It seems like every time I turn around cat food has gone up at the grocery store.

[MrsBrady]

13. you have every right to bitch

good luck to you.

[elocs]

15. You do what you have to do, then get on with your life.

Been there, done that. My 10 years are up in August (I will turn 57 that month). Great timing--oh well. My credit score is good at 741, down from a high of 765 in August, all of which is hard to understand since I have not worked full time since last May.

[SheilaT]

16. While I am no where near bankruptcy,

I have had financial changes in my life: divorce, move halfway across the country, difficulty finding a permanent full-time job, and ex losing his job and cutting his support payments to me. I've learned I can live on a lot less than I thought I needed. I've rediscovered the joys of the public library. Entertain myself in ways that don't involve spending money.

Things will get better. Friends are always a treasure.

I'm 60, and I thought I'd be coasting at this point, and I'm going to need to work for ten years just to build up my social security to a decent point. I stayed home for 25 years raising two sons. and it's reflected in my ss payment. But I'm in good health, have many years ahead of me.

Every day is an adventure.

[BlooInBloo]

17. :(((

[defendandprotect]

20. My friend recently filed bankruptcy . . . the attorney was $2,000--!!!

[bkkyosemite]

23. My cousin is right now attorney wants $700 retainer.

[defendandprotect]

24. I was shocked . . . and I thought you could file papers yourself . . .???

This was NJ ... in December . . .

I told her to check around for better rates and I tried to ask here if anyone

paid for this recently -- anyway, she couldn't wait because she was being dunned

for some time and had a car payment she had to protect. Someone where she works

recommended this firm to her.

I'm still not sure how bad this rate was -- terribly bad if your $700 is anywhere

near average.

[Javaman]

56. Once upon a time one could...

but the bill 2005 that changed the bankruptcy law changed all that.

[defendandprotect]

29. GOP's "third world America" is staring us in the face . . .

they've been working on this for decades -- as we were being warned!

Bad news no matter where you turn --

Hope you have some good news soon!!

[1776Forever]

32. The boat you're in is very crowded unfortunately - Let's hope for better days ahead!

Filed this month too - No way out with medical bills and no full-time jobs in site for us in Florida. We hung on as long as we could!

Hang in there - You are not alone and we are only doing the best we can.

:grouphug:

[SeattleGirl]

34. Our bankruptcy was final in December.

You have to do what you have to do.

I believe in personal responsibility, but sometimes things happen that are out of your control (the mortgage mess, the faltering economy, getting laid off, etc). And sometimes those things eventually get to be so overwhelming that no matter how hard you try, no matter WHAT you try, you just keep falling deeper and deeper into a hole. And at some point, you may find it necessary to say STOP, and to take a radical step toward getting out of that hole.

That's the conclusion we finally came to, so we filed for bankruptcy.

Wasn't my first choice, but I am glad we did it. We have rent and household bills, but that's all. Anything we want to buy, we'll pay cash, except for big item purchases like a car (which, thankfully, we do NOT need to purchase right now).

Chin up, Minimus. There are a lot of us who are in similar situations. We can lean on each other when we need some support. :hug:

[Minimus]

42. Thank you - and to all DUers for their words of encoragement.

Just one of the many reasons that I love DU!
:grouphug:

[fight4my3sons]

43. we went through it two years ago

My husband lost his job unexpectedly. We have three very young children who were not in school yet. My dad paid for the bankruptcy lawyer ($1500). It was not what we ever wanted to do, but we had gotten so far behind that it was unavoidable. We now track every single penny that we earn and spend in a Money program. It was a stressful time, but it was a relief when it was done. Hang in there. :hug:

[Native]

44. I'm in FL where you get to keep your house - can't tell you how many people

I know who are in the process or have already filed. I'm talking people who could actually afford not to. Why? Because financially it was the best way to get out from under debt. Attorneys in our state know exactly how to set you up to keep just about everything. I know people who have actually made deals with builders (who are so desperate they are providing their own financing on their custom homes), slapped money down with them, let their existing homes go into foreclosure, file bankruptcy to eliminate all credit card debt (after running it up with the intention of filing), funneling cash out to relatives, etc..., and then laughing all the way to the bank. Really pisses me off to hear this crap, but it's almost become epidemic in our area (hard hit county). The stigma is rapidly dissipating - some people are even bragging about it. Your situation is not unique, it is what the laws were put in place to do (help), and you have every right to take this option. Check out what other countries provide their citizens in this respect. The U.S. isn't the most generous.

[closeupready]

61. There are people who do that, but please recognize most people who file are struggling,

not scheming to defraud others. That is an offensive right-wing meme.

[TuxedoKat]

50. I'm sorry you are going through this

Have you seen the posts on DU that the US Census is hiring? In some places it is for temporary work, but in some they have permanent positions. I applied for a temp position with them myself recently and they recently called me to see if I was still interested. Good luck and hugs. www.census.gov

[Minimus]

52. I was one of the first to apply in my area- back in Nov 2008 but have not heard from them as of yet.

Thank you.

[TuxedoKat]

55. I'd give them a call

because when I took the test earlier this month they advised me to call if I didn't hear from them in a few weeks. It will show you are interested and move your paperwork to the top of the pile. Good luck again and hugs, here's a heart for you.

[Thickasabrick]

51. I went bankrupt in 2000. Since then I have financed 3 houses and

have pretty good credit now even with the bankruptcy on my credit report (it will drop off next year from my credit report). The first two house mortgages had somewhat high interest rates but paying those regularly allowed me to get a normal interest rate.

The reason I'm telling you all this is that it sucks pretty much for 2-3 years as far as getting credit but after that, it's just a minor inconvenience. With the numbers that are going bankrupt now, it might even be easier to come out of it than it was for me.

Hope that helps and good luck....you will be fine.

[TheCowsCameHome]

53. Sad commentary on the situation of many in the US today.

I wish you well.

[WhiteTara]

54. my bankruptcy clears this year

I never felt the least bit bad about filing. I felt like hell when I lost my company, but I have a great life now and my credit is great.
good luck :hug:

[LibertyLover]

57. I understand only too well and you have my sympathy -

I filed for bankruptcy in December. The house is in foreclosure because I can't pay the mortgage, buy food, commute to work, pay the bills and keep my husband in the style to which he is accustomed on my salary. Oh, he talked a great game about getting a job once our daughter was in school full time, but somehow he always had something better to do first - like tweak his crossbow or mold bullets for his new Civil War era gun or build an Adirondack chair for his daughter from his first marriage or try and get his back to stop hurting. I begged and pleaded with him to find a job, but somehow the time was never right - our daughter was out of school for the summer or it was almost the holidays or he didn't like the hours a job was offering or his shoulder was bothering him. Now, unless a miracle occurs, we will loose the house, our dogs and I will loose my self-respect because I couldn't provide for my daughter.

[Hassin Bin Sober]

58. I've recently walked two friends through the process and it' s not the end of the world.

Some thoughts.

Don't stress out about your court date or "creditors meeting."

The meeting will take two minutes. The attorney told my friend she will be done so fast she won't know what happened. You sit down, raise your hand, state your name and answer a few questions. The creditors don't even bother to show up. She was out in literally two minutes or less. They are very busy.

You'll be in a room full of people going through the same problems so don't feel embarrassed.

The phone calls from the creditors will cease almost immediately after filing. The creditors are so afraid of being accused of trying to collect a debt from someone under the court's protection they will stop sending statements on debts NOT in the bankruptcy - like an auto or house you are keeping.

You WILL receive a lot of mail, from companies that buy the public court records, trying to sell you their pre-bankruptcy required classes or auto dealers ... toss 'em all in the garbage.

The pre-filing and pre-meeting on-line classes are a joke. Don't sweat 'em.

[madokie]

59. I wish you didn't have to.

I'm real happy that you can if need be. Thats one of the recent laws they need to revisit.

[RebelOne]

60. Actually, you didn't have to contact your creditors.

Your attorney takes care of that. I filed a Chapter 13 about 2 years ago. I couldn't file a Chapter 7 because I am working full-time, plus collecting social security. And according to the bankruptcy laws, I made too much money, so I had to file a Chapter 13. The payments are made automatically from my pay check. But I have another 4 years before it will be paid off.