How to handle RW crap about Socialism - and a game to play too!

[havocmom]

(Reposted as OP at request of a DUer I rather enjoy. - This is something I wrote on my personal blog back during the campaign.)

Edited to add: do it in your best Jeff Foxworthy voice

Memo to those who feared Obama would make us a socialist or communist nation:
IF you have ever driven on a road which was built, maintained, patrolled for safety using public monies.... YOU may be a socialist.

IF you helped your elderly parents sign up for Medicare so you would not have to pay for all the healthcare they need... YOU may be a socialist.

IF you have ever eaten ANYTHING you did not grow yourself, anything which was grown with any governmental program to help the producer, shipped over any public roadway, inspected for your safety at any point.... YOU may be a socialist.

IF you sent your kids to a public school... YOU may be a socialist

IF you home-schooled, but asked for any help from any public official along the way, or if you used a public library rather than write, print and use your own books... YOU may be a socialist.

IF you are a proud Libertarian but have EVER ventured off your own property, used anything you did not grow, harvest, manufacture yourself on that property... YOU may be a socialist

IF you are a Libertarian or anti-government voter who ever invested in buying stock, held a bank account, owned or used American currency... YOU may be a socialist.

If you have been anything but a hermit in a loincloth, you may be a socialist. If you define socialism as any form of taking tax money from people to provide people with the services and infrastructure, you are lying to yourself about how ruggedly independent you are. You are dependent on the society and the society takes care of many needs.

If you want help me make a list of groups who may be socialists, leave a comment and add to the list. It is Friday, end of a very long week, we could use an exercise in consciousness raising that could provide us with a bit of humor too.

[leftstreet]

1. If you call the Fire Department, you are a Socialist

:o

[muntrv]

2. If you support the troops outside Blackwater/Xe, you are socialist.

[Cerridwen]

3. If you work for any government office or agency...

I'm always astounded at anti-"socialist" government employees.

Congresscritters are the worst for that stance.

[Quantess]

43. Yes, and that includes the military.

And elected officials especially.
Bobby Jindal, you feed at the taxpayers' trough. Congratulations on being a socialist.

[H2O Man]

4. Thank you for this.

Nominated.

[havocmom]

10. from you, sir, a pleasure

thanks H2O Man

[Joe Fields]

36. self edit. wrong spot

[Why Syzygy]

5. Union member or beneficiary of their collective bargaining.

ie make above $3.35 per hour.

[pnutbutr]

6. If you define

socialism as any form of taking tax money from the people to provide people with services and infrastructure you don't really understand socialism.

[havocmom]

12. it's the wingers' who have the problem

if they don't like a program it's 'socialism'

[pnutbutr]

14. validation

so you validate their misconceptions about socialism and push them even further away from the truth.

[JHB]

28. No, he's mocking those misconceptions...

...by pointing out how often and unexpectedly they apply.

[havocmom]

30. Thank you. I gave up dealing with either the density or the ideology

which would be out of place around here. ;)

Could be a humor impairment too, but I doubt it.

[pnutbutr]

33. one can be

a democrat and still understand the problems associated with implementing true socialism. The intent of my post was to say that a few social programs and ones use of those programs in no way implies that person is a socialist or even that the policies are = to socialism.

[JHB]

34. So was havocmom's

I might add, the open mockery which ran throughout her post was rather more clear in making that point than yours were. Yours came off as if the writer was either a troll or too dense or ideologically rigid to perceive that the OP was mocking the RWinger's definitions.

If that wasn't your intent, well, please do better next time.

[gratuitous]

7. If you've ever eaten at a restaurant

And relied on the County Health Department to inspect and assure the wholesomeness of the food you were served . . . You might be a socialist.

[bvar22]

8. The list is extensive.

(Needs to be transcribed into the Foxworthy format)

the following are "Socialist" Programs...publicly funded programs providing communal services or protections. Many of these programs are in danger of being privatized.)


I like being reasonably sure that when I turn on my faucet, water comes out.

I like knowing that when I buy gas, I get a real gallon. (Bureau of Weights & Measures ?)

When I eat at a restaurant, I like being reasonably sure there isn't a rat turd in my soup. :( (Health Dept.)

I like being reasonably sure that my airliner won't crash into another. (FAA)

I like the knowledge that if my ship sinks, I can call someone to rescue me. (Coast Guard)

I like flipping my switch and a light coming on even when I'm in the woods. (Rural Electrification)

I like it that it doesn't flood every time it rains. (Corp of Engineers)

I like commerce being able to use our rivers for transportation. (Corp of Engineers)

I like the pictures from Hubble. (NASA)

I like believing that when I take a pill for an illness, I'll probably be OK. (FDA)

I like knowing that if my girlfriend gets makeup in her eye, she probably won't go blind. (FDA)

I like knowing that even if my bank president runs off with the money, I'll probably still be able to get my savings. (FDIC)

I like knowing that if my neighbor starts dumping toxic waste in HIS yard, I can stop him.

I like knowing that if my house catches on fire, someone will come to put it out.

I like being able to call the Police if I need them.

I like knowing when hurricane or tornado is approaching. (Weather Bureau)

I like weekends off, overtime, vacation, and a 40hr work week. (Socialist Labor Unions)

I like it that McDonalds and Wal-Mart can't exploit children. (Child Labor Laws)

I like knowing that someone is watching out for epidemics. (Center for Disease Control)

I like knowing that Farmers (Large and Small) have access to information that lets them make good decisions concerning crops and land usage. (Bureau of Land Management & Farm Bureau?)
These are just a few.
There are many, many more socialist (gasp) programs that Americans (even Libertarians) take for granted EVERY FUCKING DAY!


(added by DUer “Iowa”)

--I like knowing that I can seek assistance if my employer creates a deadly work environment. (OSHA)

--I like knowing that my parents have a decent income and medical care in their old age. (Social Security) (Medicare)

--I like it when people who are too disabled to support themselves aren't forced to be beggars. (SSI/SSDI)

--I like being able to afford to educate my kids. (Public Education) (Pell Grants)

--I like it when incompetent/impaired physicians are removed from practice. (state boards of examiners)

--I like to see snake-pit nursing homes fined and shut-down. (State Inspections & Appeals)

--I like it when a person injured on the job can get some financial help with retraining and job placement. (Vocational Rehabilitation)

---I like the security of knowing that the bridges on our Interstate Highway System won't suddenly collapse. (DoT) (OOPS! :blush:)

---I like the comfort of knowing that the heavy trucks sharing our Highways & Interstates are regulated, licensed, and inspected! (DoT)(OOPS! :blush:)

[Why Syzygy]

11. NASA is a bit iffy

it's federally funded, but made little progress until it was de-militarized.

[pacalo]

9. Keeper!

[Narkos]

13. Nice!

[tom_paine]

15. Great stuff, havocmom! K & R!

[havocmom]

19. LOL Me thinks the lad has seen it before in another venue

Thanks Tom, my friend.

[QueenOfCalifornia]

16. Rec #20

Excellent.

If you drink or use water which was cleaned and maintained by your government you may be a socialist.

If you flew in an aircraft, or ever walked or lived or drove under the path of airplanes or jets whose safety was monitored by the FAA and federally mandated air traffic controllers, you may be a socialist.

If you purchased or ate meat that was inspected by those pesky USDA people, you may be a socialist.

If you ever called 911, you called a police force whose bills are paid by your tax dollars, If so, you too are most likely a SOCIALIST.

[havocmom]

20. Great additions to the list, your majasty

Many thanks for joining in.

[QueenOfCalifornia]

23. I am most happy

to be of service....

Kick for this thread!

[RandomKoolzip]

17. Nice thread! Do you mind if I borrow some of this?

I'm debating some libertarian assholes and I need fuel.

[havocmom]

18. Written and publically posted by me for that very purpose

Be my guest. Raise awareness.

[RandomKoolzip]

22. Thank ya!

[ipfilter]

21. If you ever flushed your toilet

and enjoyed your crap getting carried away from your house, you are a socialist.

[havocmom]

24. Ah, one more case of the sweet smell of socially shouldered facts of life!

:thumbsup:

Keep it up, people. We can get a good list together. The wingers and the no-tax crowd need some schooling! They ALL benefit from socialized infrastructure.

[QueenOfCalifornia]

25. LOL!

:rofl::rofl::rofl:
:rofl:
:rofl::rofl:
:rofl::rofl::rofl:
:rofl:
:rofl::rofl::rofl:
:rofl:
:rofl::rofl:
:rofl:
:rofl:

[HughBeaumont]

26. The "Self Made Millionaire" Myth . . . Debunked.

http://www.commondreams.org/archive/2007/11/07/5075

To see what's wrong with this idea, it's easiest to start with criteria that ought to disqualify a person from claiming to be "entirely self-made." After we've applied these criteria, we can see who's left in the pool. So, then, let us scratch from the list of the self-made anyone whose accumulation of wealth has been aided by any of the following:

* Laws concerning property or contracts, and the public agencies that enforce such laws
* Public schools or employees educated in public schools
* Employees or customers who rely on public transportation
* Roads, bridges, airports, sewers, water treatment plants, harbors, or other utilities built and maintained at public expense
* Mail systems built and operated at public expense
* Public hospitals and government-licensed physicians
* Health and safety regulations created and enforced at public expense
* Police and fire protection provided at public expense
* Public libraries and parks
* Any public amenities that add value to commercial or residential real estate
* Government contracts
* Government-provided business incentives
* Regulatory agencies, such as the Federal Trade Commission or the Securities and Exchange Commission, that sustain trust in the stock market
* The Internet
* A form of currency legitimated and backed by a stable government
* Social welfare programs that keep the poor from rebelling
* The U.S. military

If we use these criteria to determine who can legitimately claim to be "entirely self-made," the Forbes number drops dramatically. It's not 270 out of 400. In fact, it's precisely zero.

If not for the legal and political arrangements that we create and maintain as a society -- with contributions from us all, costs to us all, and benefits to us all -- and if not for what we call "the public infrastructure," nobody could accumulate wealth. In short, there can be no private wealth without common wealth.

[havocmom]

27. Excellant!

Thanks for the great material

Folks, we will need to work hard to debunk the GOP crap that will be used to obstruct the change the voters want. Arm yourselves with concepts and FACTS to turn back the propaganda EVERYWHERE you hear it.

President Obama is a wellspring of energy and he has assembled an amazing team, but fixing the damage to America will take much effort from all of us. Show your love by being vigilant when the talking point crap hits the air everywhere.

[JHB]

29. If you ever chartered a corporation, or bought stock in one...

... YOU may be a socialist.

[Lugnut]

31. K&R n/t

[Stellabella]

32. If you've ever been warned of an approaching storm and taken shelter,

YOU are a socialist.

National Weather Service!

[TornadoTN]

35. This is a great post - thank you very much

I believe I'm going to get this one circulating around the right-wing office that I work in.

[Joe Fields]

37. I was going to write a thread about what services republicans don't like....

if it involves the slightest hint of socialism, and my list was similar to this, but now I don't have to. Thank you. It's just too easy to poke holes in phony philosophies.

[ejpoeta]

38. if you have ever had a child with develepmental delays or learning disabilities

and availed yourself of services provided by the school, such as speech therapy or developmental therapy in which therapists come to your house or the school to work with the kids, you may be a socialist. If your child has a one on one aide in school to help them get to and from class/lunch/bathroom, you might be a socialist.

-----
i have a very right wing sister and brother in law who watch faux "news" and piss and moan about 'welfare queens' and how awful the dems are. they have a daughter who has had a lot of problems and have had therapists and everything paid for by the school or unless there is some other program that pays for it. I think its great that my niece has had the extra help she needs, and she is flourishing because of it. I wonder if my sister realizes, based on 'principles' just who would make sure such things are provided. and who would tell them to get bent. hmmm...

[havocmom]

39. Hope your neice continues to flourish, with continued 'socialist' help

Live in a very RW county and a high % of locals have only hatred for 'gubmint' workers, but they sure do count on those gubmint programs and they sure love them their WIC vouchers so they can keep some of the money they would be spending on food for truck payments and beer.

My RW brother just LOVED being able to get Medicare and runs to the doctor for everything. He gets to the doctor on well tended roads, not a trail he blazes through the wilderness himself. He loves getting that Social Security check in the mail too. Never gives much thought to that whole process either.

It is enough to make you cry when they carry on about how put upon they are to have to pay a couple grand a year to the taxman. They NEVER see all the wonders of what they get back, do they?

[ejpoeta]

40. wanna hear the irony.... my sister and brother in law both work for the 'gubmint'.

in the IRS!! LOL!

[havocmom]

41. OK, that's rich! LOL

someone most dear to me works for a federal agency, and does so in an area filled with bigots inside and outside the office. Can't wait for when the picture of the new President arrives for the office. :rofl:

edited for typo

[havocmom]

42. delete cuz I need coffee

[Blue_Tires]

44. If you're a constitution-quoting, freedom-loving individualist libertarian

but hate the 'anti-american' ACLU, then you're just an ignorant RW jerkoff...